Demented Scribblings About Stuff

Nano 2011~Chapter 8

2012-01-18T13:03:00.000-08:00

It was a long time later when I got up. It was almost dark! I flew down the stairs. I needed to check in at work! I needed to make something to eat! I needed to feed the girls…What to do first! Argh!

I stopped at the bottom of the stairs because I smelled wondrous food. The girls were all head deep in their bowls on the porch, and my stag man was talking on the phone. “Is that my boss?” I whispered and he nodded, passing it over.

“Sorry I didn’t check in earlier, but I had to go see my mother, she’s in the hospital.”

“I’ve heard.” My boss responded. “I am sorry. You’ve been having a tough time. You have a couple of weeks vacation time, would you like to use it?” I thought about it, then shook my head even though she couldn’t see it over the phone. “I’ve known you too long. I didn‘t think so.” She laughed. “Your new friend sounds like a helluva catch. Enjoy yourself.” I KNEW I was blushing and I hoped he couldn’t hear the conversation. We hung up and I looked around. He had set the table with the plastic silverware and plates.

“Know I cooking our trust not you. Out take good is.” He must’ve come across my stash of menus. There was some pizza, and Chinese, and a salad, and a meatball sub with provolone, just the way I liked it. I kissed his cheek unthinkingly.

“Thanks.”

“Your money used I.” I shrugged. That was okay; I had plenty in the bank and I was happy that he had. If it had been my ex I know I would’ve hit the ceiling, but my deer man had been thinking of me. And he had told me about it even if it had been after the fact. And when had I started thinking of him as “mine?”

He must’ve just closed his eyes and picked things on the Chinese Menu, but he did alright. The Mongolian Beef was hot as Hell and as he bit into a pepper because I didn’t warn him in time, his eyes filled with tears and he gulped down some water and I handed him a piece of bread. My Brahma would eat those claw over talon if I let her. She liked spicy food. My Leghorn had a sweet beak.

“Things fire are.” He commented once he was able. The Sweet and Sour Chicken was excellent and the Feta and Spinach pizza with White Sauce was good too, even if it was salty as the Dead Sea. We split the sub and salad and would still have enough left over for another meal. I stuffed the remaining food into the fridge.

Once we were done, I put some scraps down for the girls, and did the dishes. We sat outside on the front steps watching the sky darken towards night and the stars appear. He had his arm around me and I just nestled into his side. This is what a couple SHOULD be like…I thought. My ex had never touched me unless he wanted something and that was usually sex. Yuck. A couple of families walked by with their dogs and kids. One of the dogs was a Deerhound and I figured there might be an issue, but the animal must’ve gotten a clue that this particular deer might be a bit different, and yanked his owners quickly away. One of the oldsters came across to say hi and ask about my girls. I went inside and brought out a half dozen eggs for him. “I was a friend of Jim too.” I obviously heard the last of the conversation. “She’s a sweet girl. And loves her chickens. What happened to you? There was a cop car here this morning.”

This was one of the good older neighbours. I gave him the short story. “If you need me to go to bat for ya, I can. I was a cop way before any of these kids were around. You’ve never caused any trouble and I know you’ve stopped some before it got started.” I thanked him, handed him the eggs and he started back up the street.

“Friends many have here you.” My deer man stated. That was true. I had made more friends since I had moved to my house than I had all the other years I had been on the planet. Living in an apartment in the city wasn’t really conducive to meeting people anyways, and the folks I worked with, most of them were older and had families already. There was no way I was going to meet people at my mother’s church: I had been only a couple of times and the men, though married, had looked at me like I was the all you can eat buffet. No thanks.

I really liked his People that I had met so far, well the good ones anyways. I wasn’t sure about the Crow woman…

I changed my clothes and got ready for bed. He had washed up a bit and brushed his teeth with an extra toothbrush I had found in a cabinet. I changed his bandage too. He seemed to be healing well and quickly. I looked him over again. He really wasn’t hard on the eyes. I don’t know if I would ever have approached him, because I would have considered him so far out of my league that I wasn’t even in the same ball park…Hell, I KNEW I wouldn’t ever have. I sighed.

He tucked the sheet around his lower half again. I got in and snuggled up right against his chest. This was something special and I was going to treasure it for as long as it lasted. The thought made me sad. Once he was all healed up he’d be going back to the Park. I could still see him whenever I wanted, but it was really nice to have a non-insistent bed mate who was considerate of my needs, not even trying to force sex on me…I was pretty sure that if it was someone else, I’d be fighting them off.

I dawned on me as I was falling asleep that when we were at the hospital he was dressed in a button down, short sleeved Oxford shirt with Khakis, but when we were at the house, he had been wearing a t shirt and denim cutoffs. Maybe that was part of the Glamour. Hmmm…That prolly meant I’d been wandering around with a naked guy the whole day. Oh man. And I hadn’t even peeked!

Doing my research I understood the different powers of the Fair Folk, well some of them anyways. Glamour was a biggie. They could look like almost anything they wanted. Or make an illusion to make something NOT appear as it was. Shapeshifting, like Pookas or WaterHorses or Selkies, could be a part of the Glamour. But my deer man’s Shapeshifting seemed like it was just a part of him, a physical thing. The last thing that I found was that if one of the Fae looked you right in the eye, they could have a power over you, like what he had done to my mother, and also to me to make me sleep.

I was right too, about the Fair Folk and going into their world/time/space. As long as you didn’t eat or drink you could be rescued. The Fair Folk could take people for servants, or nursemaids, or for their skills, or for breeding stock. Yuck. There were also half-Fae that could travel between both worlds without a problem. But for full humans, once you partied it up there you were screwed.

Iron and steel still seemed like a huge no-no. Allegedly bells and cats, Holey Stones, running water(ala Vampyres) St Johns wort, Ash and Rowan berries would keep you from having to deal with all of that, along with Bread and the trappings of Christendom, like hymns, holy water and wearing a cross. Not gonna happen.

“C‘hoar Bihan? Think you too much. Sleep now.” I wasn’t going to turn and look into his eyes. But I scrunched even closer and he wrapped his arms tighter around me.

There was plenty of time to ask all the questions I might have in the morning, and it was good to have someone to sleep with. My ex usually made me leave after he had gotten his rocks off and I’d head off to the couch after a very hot shower.

I felt myself relax as he stroked along my ribs and kissed the back of my head. I had another dream of the Fairie Court. This time my ex shot me!! I woke up with a pounding heart and jumped out of bed. I felt around for the bullet wound, but I hadn’t been hurt outside of the dream.

“C‘hoar? Okay are you?” I shivered with a sob and turned into his arms. “Dream bad did have you?” He whispered words in my ear and kissed my lips for the first time. Tender and gentle seemed to be the only words to describe his kiss.

“Better now.” I murmured against his lips. He chuckled and gave me another quick kiss.

Waking up was soo much better when there was someone next to you. I rubbed his ear and touched the closest antler before heading downstairs to start getting ready for the day. I had been noticing that his hair had been sort of changing colour and went online to see if that was normal…well for deer anyway. They went from a reddish-brown in the spring/summer to a taupe in the fall to a grayish-blue in the winter months. He’d lose his gorgeous antlers in the winter too. Bummer. And then there was the Rut: when all the male deer tried to see who’d get all the female deer. That went on from October to November. I wondered if he would go look for some does too, like the rest of the bucks. Did I really want to know though? Prolly not a good idea to ask.

We had to go to a doctor to have the stitches taken out. It had been a week since they had been put in and even with his shape shifting they hadn’t pulled apart. The doctor was really nice about letting us just walk in. I paid the co-pay and we were out in just a few minutes. I took a before and after picture for the court date which was coming up in a couple of days.

Of course, now that THAT was getting close my mother had decided that she needed to blow up my phones with calls. After the first few, I didn’t even bother picking up. She had wanted to know if I was still fucking that foreign pig and why didn’t I settle for my ex…Well that was what I had done, settled for second or third or hundredth best. As for having sex, that hadn’t happened and I was fine with that…We were friends, not friends with benefits. My girls seemed to adore him and he liked being with them too.

The court date went as expected. I was no good, I was a whore, I was stalking HIM, etc. Of course, my mother didn’t help matters. She was acting as if it were a revival meeting rather than a somber proceeding, yelling out AMEN when my ex was making his points. I wondered how she got out and how she had gotten to the courthouse.

The cops got on the stand and gave their accounts. The ER folks brought along their 8X10 glossies. My stomach did a flip and I was glad that I had been on the other side of him as they had dug around in his arm.

I told my part of it, leaving out PePe’s shape shifting, naturally. I said that another walker had told me that my friend was being held at gunpoint on the dock and that he might need help. I also got to tell about the stalking and harassment that he had been doing, including all the phone calls, following me into the dressing room of the store, and having the gun. I also brought my copy of the divorce decree and the pictures of the damage he had done to my car.

My deer man said that he had just been walking along the path when this man came up and told him to stay away from his wife. He had only seen him one other time and that was because he had been scaring his friend, meaning me, and had told him to leave me alone.

My ex said that it was all a misunderstanding, that he loved me (all of my Park friends almost died laughing on that one) and wanted me back.

The cops played the 911 recording to refute that lie. Both my mother and my ex said that it was my deer man’s fault and that I had been cheating on my ex with him. Which was absolute bullshit because I hadn’t even KNOWN about the Park People until after Mr Jim had died which was AFTER I had left him and filed for divorce.

My ex would be going away for a year or so when all was said and done. Thank God! He might get some time off for good behaviour, but I wouldn’t have to see his pasty round Saxon face for quite a while. Gods, that was racist of me.

My mother broke into hysterics, wailing like a beansidhe. It hadn’t helped that she had worn all black with a hat and veil, like she was in mourning. Cy made fun of her, changing her clothes into a humungous picture hat that would’ve blocked Shaq’s view of the proceedings and a Civil War looking dress complete with hoopskirt.
The men had dressed business casual with my stag man wearing three piece suit and a silk tie too. Jamaica had a Burberry suit on. The Crow woman wore a black power suit.

My Park friends clustered around congratulating us. The charges against the pair of us had been dropped too since we had done nothing wrong. My deer man had been trying to keep me from harm and that was part of the Good Samaritan rule. Tripping over and getting sprayed by a skunk had just been bad luck. PePe had snickered at that.

We had a celebration with my friends, my boss, some coworkers, the cops, and a couple of the neighbours that had been Mr. Jim’s friends. We had a BBQ. My deer man was very good with the open fire and that was great. I would never have dared, being afraid that I would burn down the whole place. There was music and singing and lotsa food.

The bash had gone on for a while and folks started leaving quite late. I had had a great time. I cleaned up so that critters wouldn’t help themselves, tossing the paper plates and putting the plastic cutlery into the recycling bin. I put the food away into the fridge, but there wasn’t that much left because I had made up doggie bags for the invitees. But that was okay.

I was tired from all the emotional ups and downs. I was yawning and practically tripping over my own feet when I gave up. Anything else would have to wait for the morning or at least when I got up. My stag man carried me up the stairs and put me on the bed. “Sleep just, C‘hoar Bihan.” I didn’t need much prompting. I rolled over and was out.

I woke alone. WTF? I looked out the window and he was supervising the rest of the clean up. I choked my heart back down to where it belonged. PePe, Tham, and the Woodpecker boys were helping. My girls were clucking around their feet. It was an interesting scene of domesticity.

Nano 2011~Chapter 7

2012-01-17T16:57:00.000-08:00

I woke to my stomach growling. It was past noon, so it was time for lunch. I got up, went to the kitchen and threw some tuna salad together. I had plenty of tomatoes, and celery, and used a tiny bit of onion for extra flavour. I called “Lunch!” from the bottom of the stairs. At least my deer man wasn’t picky, unlike my ex who would pick out anything the might’ve resembled a mushroom or a pepper or an herb…if not flat out refuse to eat it.

I was thinking through the meal, so it was rather quiet. "Pan" didn’t seem to need to fill the silence with aimless prattle, again unlike my ex. That was two items in the Plus Column.

My phone rang and I damn near jumped out of my skin. I raced to it and snapped out a Hello. It was the police! I guess my "loving mother" got crocked to the gills and crashed her car into a utility pole…just great. I wasn’t thrilled about the fact that she had been drinking, let alone drinking and driving, but she had been admitted to the hospital for her slight injuries and, since I was on the list of contacts, it was up to me to go. The first one on the list was locked up and therefore unavailable.

I sat back down in my chair. She wasn’t going anywhere fast, so I could finish lunch, and take my time. They were going to call when she either got put into a room or released so I could drive her home. I gave them my cell number. This wasn’t the first time this had happened either, though. When I had gone to college, I stayed on campus even though it made sense for me to have stayed home because it would've been cheaper. I went on a field study trip to Chaco to play amongst the dead things and she pulled the same shit. I got a call on the satellite phone that I needed to go home IMMEDIATELY for a family emergency. She was fine, just drunk as a skunk(sorry PePe). Everytime I had tried to get away from her, she just added another strand to her web of lunacy. I had FINALLY broken free when I got the job at the firm. My ex had kept her up to date when we had gotten married, obviously. Now that I was free from him, she had lost that inside source. I wondered if THAT had set her off this time…I looked to my deer man who was just watching me. Betcha HE had something to do with it. Betcha my ex had called her and said that he had gotten beaten up for no reason…he certainly would’ve left out the gun slinging, threatening, his property part…and made it out to be all MY fault.

“News bad, C‘hoar Bihan?”

“Not really. My mother’s in the hospital. She crashed her car into a pole.”

“To see go?”

“Yeah.” I didn’t want to, but I would because it was the right thing to do. He wouldn’t force me to go either, but he’d come with me even if I didn’t ask him. I just sorta knew that.

We finished lunch, and he took the dishes to the sink, which, for some odd reason, was stone and not steel…It took a bit of work to keep nice.

My car had been finished and I could pick it up anytime. The rental place driver could take me there so I could get it. I apologized that there was blood on the seat, but then we had been assaulted. And yes, I had taken pictures of the damage. That would be part of the case. My deer man came with me. He watched the driving very carefully from the front seat. No way he‘d fit in the back.

“Thinking of getting your license?” I asked. He shook his head. We picked up the Tempo which had been nicely detailed too. I paid, and while there, the hospital called again. My mother would be staying for a while, on suicide watch…lovely. Fucking Gods damned drama queen! She had tried one time stabbing herself in the stomach because one of the shows she was hooked on got cancelled, but then called 911 because it hurt. Duh! She had been committed involuntarily, but checked herself out after a couple of days. I wasn’t going to be taking care of her. I had my birds to take care of that gave me so much more joy.

The hospital was on the way back from the body shop, so we swung by. I wasn’t expecting to stay long at all. I already felt the little acid pumps in my stomach firing away. I asked at the desk to find the room for Katherine Arbiter and had to say that I was her daughter and show ID. The tall man with the gentle eyes and his arm in a sling following in my wake would’ve gotten noticed anywhere. I took the elevator to the 7th floor. She wasn’t in intensive care, but on a general floor right near the nurses’ station.

I told the gal at the kiosk who I was, and asked how my mother was. The disgusted look on her face before she turned on a fake smile, told me all I needed to know. The old bag was up to her usual head games. The deer man squeezed my shoulder. There was a policeman taking her statement when we stepped in. She was telling the cop that something furry had run across the road in front of her and she had crashed trying to miss it, because she loved animals so much. (She hated them, and I had never had a pet, not even a fish, or a dust bunny, or a pet rock.) When the cop asked again, it was because she dropped her cigarette in her lap. (A bad habit I had never taken up, thanks.)

“Oh, look! It’s my beloved daughter come to tell you it’s all a misunderstanding! Tell Officer McGinnis, Lizzie.” I cringed. I ALWAYS hated that short form of my name; I had had some scrapes in school because it sounded too much like the derogatory word for girls who really liked girls.

“Good afternoon Officer McGinnis, what was her BAC?(Legally drunk in our state was .08) And how fast was she going?” I KNOW I sounded peeved, because I was.

“She blew a .17 (Damn!) She says she was only going 35, but witnesses say she was going…” He flipped a couple of pages in his notebook. “60 on Main Street and she was weaving in and out of traffic, crossing the centre line. She has to attend a hearing, but I think the Registry’s gonna pull her license, because it‘s the 7th time she‘s done this.” She’d drive without it…I KNEW that for a fact because she’d done it before. And it was more like 10th. If I took her keys, she’d hafta get around somehow. The “faithful” ladies from her church would prolly shun her because true forgiveness wasn’t really part of their make up. There was public transportation, or she could take a taxi, or Gods forbid, she could walk or ride a bike. I KNEW that she’d want ME to chauffeur her ass around, without my ex able to do it, and I wasn’t going to. I was here ONLY because we had a slender as a hair blood tie. And I wished again that I had gotten to know my father’s family because there was no way they could be as fucked as this one was.

“It’s a mistake Lizzie! You KNOW that! I’m a good driver!” I cringed as she started whining. “I wasn’t speeding! I don’t drive fast and I certainly follow the rules of the road! I’ll show you RIGHT NOW!!” She rattled the handcuffs. “If this pig would just let me out…”

I had my father’s last name and I guess I rather looked like him, not that I remembered him at all. I was a “ginger” which hadn’t helped a damned thing in school either. I had heard all of the “soulless ginger” jokes and they had hurt way down into my heart too. Having no back up at home either…I felt the tears coming.

“Oh my Poor Little Lizzie. So upset over seeing your mother held captive by the Town Gestapo…” Of course she would think that…her own little fictional world had no semblence to the real one. I reluctantly went over and hugged her just to be nice. No wonder she didn’t like fairy tales, she lived in one of her own making.

“See Officer, my daughter loves her old mother! She knows I’m a good person!” She was damned near strangling me and I was struggling to get away. My deer man had to pry her arms off me. I was going to have finger marks on my throat because she was warning me not to say a word to contradict her…Man, she had another think coming. I had had more than enough of histrionics, drama and bullshit, and her up and down roller coaster of emotions. She was prolly untreated, un-medicated bipolar and I had looked into that too, but she had never taken care of herself.

I stood, cleared my sore throat, and took a deep breath. “My mother is delusional. She has DUI’d before, in fact a dozen times that I know of. She’s doing this because I’m finally divorced from the man that SHE wanted me to marry. She’s a drama queen and all this is just for show. She’s never been a mother, let alone a good one. The only reason *I* was called is because my ex is in jail for shooting my friend here and isn’t able to do it himself.”

My mother was interrupting by groans and cries and shrieks like a demon tortured by Holy Water and an exorcist. She was rattling the steel handcuffs that held her to the bed again, but she wasn’t going anywhere.

“You lying fucking WHORE!” She spat finally. The Officer made a hasty escape, knowing an ugly domestic scene was about to happen.

“I’m on my deathbed and you have the BALLS to lie to an Officer of the Law? And to bring another man into see me?! Are you flaunting the fact that you‘re a slut?” Ferfucksakes!

“Mother, I am divorced finally. I got my decree in the mail. You just never understood that I never even LIKED him. YOU did! My friend came along with me just so you can see what damage my ex inflicted. He shot him and he could’ve died! You and my ex belong with each other! You’re a match made in Hell!”

“C‘hoar…” The deerman stated, then stepped around me. “Pan Stanwood am I…” I still hadn‘t talked to him about that. He held out his hand to her. She took it only because she didn’t have much of a choice. “Friends we are just. Park, daughter and I met at. Work there do I.” A bit of a stretch of the truth. “Walking was she, ex mate assignation thought we having and to shoot her tried. Skunk tripped over he, off gun went and hit got I. Hospital took me she and jail in is he.”

“You are FUCKING a foreigner!?” My mother shrieked at me, raising her decibels to jet engine. Dear Gods she never ever would get it… “You just dumped one man to shack up with another! My daughter that I raised with love and caring has turned into the town whore…How can this be? Where did I go wrong?” The woe is me speech just set me off.

“Listen, you stupid bitch! I raised myself! You were too busy being what you THOUGHT you should’ve been instead of being what you really should’ve been, caring, loving and helpful. I went to school and graduated at the top of my class. You even had the NERVE to show up drunk at my high school graduation. You’ve tried to fuck up my life since I was born, and I’ve done well in spite of you. I am happy.”

“You’re FAT!” She yelped. She had taken diet pills all my life and also did the binge and purge route…just so she could stuff herself into the stylish clothes she couldn’t afford.

“Be that as it may, mother. I am contented with the life I’m leading now. I am comfortable with where I am now.

“I’ve only wanted what was best for you!” Bullshit! She wanted a good appearance for other people.

“And you, you job stealing wetback piece of shit!” My companion stepped back from the venom in her voice. “I KNOW this is your fault! You’ve twisted her thoughts. You’re gonna fuck her, knock her up and leave her, just like her father did me! We women always think the cute ones are the best and they‘re the worst of the worst with the women hanging all over them and fertilizing wherever they go!”

“What knock up is?” He seemed genuinely puzzled. “Call phone?” If it hadn’t been such an odd situation, I might’ve laughed.

“Get her pregnant, you stupid Limey pig!” She yelled.

“English, not am I. Brittany from.”

“Whatever…You’re gonna use her for your fun, then go home to your wife and kids wherever the fuck you’re from…”

“Unmated be I.” We could both tell she was gearing up for another antiforeigner/only wanting a green card rant…He stepped back to my mother’s bed, and took her hand once again. At the touch of the metal handcuffs, his hand flashed to hoof for a second. But I was the only one who saw. He had fixed his eyes onto my mother’s and said a few words in Brythonic. She immediately sagged into sleep.

The audience that had clustered outside the door scattered as we left. The officer hadn’t gone too far, just flirting with a candystriper. Any encounter with her made me feel slimy and exhausted. “Sorry about that.” I muttered walking by. “The next time, don’t call me…Cross me off your list. I don‘t want to have anything else to do with that woman.” The cop paused mid flirt in shock.

I got to the elevator and pushed the down button. This was the end of the relationship. I couldn’t go through another one of her “episodes” again. It wasn’t worth it to me, or to my own mental health.

“Sorry am I, C‘hoar Bihan. Mean spirited is she.” Ya think?! I just pressed my head into his chest. He hugged me, then pressed the button for every floor. Each time the door opened, he looked both ways and let the other people in before letting the door close. It was a very slow trip to the lobby.

“What jack ass hit every button?” A fellow rider bitched. The deer man looked to the floor. I grabbed his hand as soon as the doors opened the final time and we beelined to the entrance before there was a mob after us. I opened the car doors and we got in. I went straight home. I felt the need to shower her miasma off me.

Unfortunately, that would be postponed for a bit because in the driveway was a police car. Shit. Now what? My ex was suing my stag man for pain and suffering. And ME, for harrassment and I was slapped with a restraining order. As the hysterical laughter threatened to boil over, I managed to explain that my EX was the one who was stalking ME. This was a different officer than than the ones I had been dealing with, so I gave this one the names of his Brethren in Blue that were in charge of my case. This day was certainly turning into a cluster fuck of the first water. I checked on the girls and saw that they were okay. At least someone was; it certainly wasn’t me…

I ran upstairs, stripped off my clothes, threw on my bathrobe and headed right into the downstairs bathroom. I turned the water onto Lobstah Boil and got in. I shook out my ponytail and grabbed the shampoo. It was Amber Scented and one of my favourites. I lathered up and rinsed, then got out my scrubbie and scrubbied away. I felt so unclean that I swore I could’ve used a potato peeler and taken off a whole layer of skin.

“C‘hoar?” His voice in my bathroom made me cower behind the clouded glass doors. “Rain falling heard I. Okay see were you.”

I managed to get soap in my eyes and that was stinging and I had been crying too, so I was a mess, I knew. As much as I wanted him to leave me alone until I was together, I found myself throwing myself at him and just bawling. He spoke soothing words to me in his native tongue and I finally calmed down. He placed me back into the shower and helped me rinse off. He took a towel off the wooden rack and patted my back dry. I did the rest myself. “Rarity are you, C‘hoar.” I KNEW he had been peeking and blushed. I wasn’t a your usual redhead. I wasn’t a carrot top, nor a strawberry blonde or a rusty red or even a chestnut colour. My hair was dark brown nearing black, but had a reddish wine tinge to it. And it was natural. I had never dyed it and it was always a shock for someone to look at me. With dark hair you would’ve expected that I’d tan easily. Nope, I’d burn to a crisp unless I used 50,000 sunblock. I would’ve been great vampyre material except for my eyes. They were a navy blue near the iris with silvery grey at the edges. It was more like an animal than a person. Another sticking point in school was the colour of my eyes. Needless to say, school was NOT fun and I had my head in a book most times. I was Valedictorian and maintained straight A’s all the way through. I was in a class by myself though, not a jock: too uncoordinated. Not cool: you already KNEW that though. But I was ostracized from the brainiacs too: my knowledge wasn’t THEIR knowledge. The only place I sorta fit was the Goth, Hippy, Druggy, Metal bunch and they only let me hang out with them because I knew where most of them were coming from.

I also had a star and crescent shaped birthmark on my hip. Except for the fact that it was pink, anyone who saw it, and those were few and far between except for health professionals, thought it was a tattoo.

My deer man had drawn his breath in when he saw it and I quickly covered up. He turned me around and looked again before asking, “What this is?”

“A birthmark. My father had one too.”

“Sire your lives still?” I shook my head.

“I don’t know. I don’t know anything about him really except for what my mother told me.” And most of that was colored by hate and bitterness, I was sure. She had said at one time that he was handsome and that he had courted her in an old-fashioned way. I took THAT with an overly large grain of salt.

“Out find you for, C‘hoar.”

“I haven’t been able to find him or anything about him.” Being an accountant, I could use a few methods not available to outsiders.

“Ways other have I.” I looked quickly into his eyes. I’m sure he did.

“Name know?”

“Braddock Dorset.” My deerman suddenly had a serious expression and I didn’t like it one bit.

“What’s the matter? Do you KNOW him?”

“Know OF him, do I.” That didn’t sound good either… “Worry not now this about, C‘hoar. We rest now.”

I slipped the robe on and the towel off. My hair was still damp, but it would dry soon enough. I felt weak from the adrenaline that had been going through my body as I had resisted the impulse to push my mother, bed and all, out the window of the hospital room. I’m sure I would get let off on extenuating circumstances. I went upstairs and he followed too closely. I was really conscious that I had known the deer man for less than two weeks; he was sleeping in my bed, eating my food and I still had no idea who the Hell he actually was…And I realized it didn’t fucking matter! I was comfortable with him, something I had never been with most people. If I had been one of those New Ager types, I woulda said that they disturbed my aura or something, but it was like they rubbed me the wrong way. I dunno.

I didn’t feel that way around PePe or Bo and Jamaica, Carl and Colin, or Mel, or Cy, or Tham. In fact I rather LIKED them. Which was odd for me. I didn’t like anyone enough to be happy to see them. But I did the Park People.

I grabbed some clean clothes, ran into the other bedroom, and dressed. I sat on the edge of the bed and brushed my hair. He took the brush, set it down on the night stand and looking directly into my eyes, spoke Brythonic. I felt as if I was on a cloud, just snuggled and nestled in.

Nano 2011~Chapter 6

2011-12-18T19:18:00.000-08:00

I tossed and turned for most of the night, finally falling asleep just in time to hear my Leghorn hen gearing up for a rusty hinge style crow. And tapping on the window? Oh ferfucksakes! I pulled my pillow tighter over my head. I needed to sleep!!

When the tapping got louder, and another bird joined in, it was deffo time for me to haul my ass out of bed. I turned on the coffee pot, let the girls out in a roiling tumble of feathery bums.

The two annoying birds were Carl and Colin, a Gold Shafted Flicker, and a Red Bellied Woodpecker, respectively, as they introduced themselves. I tossed some mealworms on the windowsill. They gulped them down, then shimmered into people on the back steps. I was rather getting used to that shape shifting strangeness.

“News flies fast.” The yellow haired man stated.

“We are here to see if you were okay.” the red bearded man said.

“I’m okay, but it would’ve been nice if you had waited until it was a decent hour.”

“We are sorry.” The pair really didn’t look the least bit sorry.

“Bullshit!” I snapped. They both broke up laughing. I handed them more worms for the road. I washed my hands and poured my first cup of the day. I peeked out at the girls. Both woodpeckers were watching them also.

“How is your King?” I asked as we went down the stairs. They looked at each other.

“He was hurt by your mate.” Colin stated, staring at the brick patio.

“That idiot is NOT my mate any longer.” This day was not starting out well. “I divorced him. I have NOTHING to do with him any more.”

“Cora will peck his eyes out.” Eww. Carl nodded in agreement. Not that my ex didn’t DESERVE to have his liver eaten. But I didn’t want any of the People to get sick either.

I needed to see the deer man, to make sure HE was alright. I turned, went back inside, and threw some clothes on. Carl and Colin were obviously waiting. “Where does he go during the day?”, I asked.

“He sleeps in Big Meadow.” Colin informed me. I really wanted to ask if he slept alone, but it wasn’t any of my business. I knew that TRUE deer were crepuscular, feeding at dusk and dawn and active at night. It was a bit after dawn so he should be back in the Big Meadow, so that’s where I’d head first.

The Big Meadow was just like it sounded, a big freaking meadow. There were saplings, thistles, tall grasses, multi-flora roses, and other neat things. I was going to call his name, but I didn’t know it. Dumbass on me. I sent my wakeup callers to go in and find him. It was a couple of acres and there was no way that I could locate him without some help.

They flew away in a search pattern like feathery Coast Guard helicopters. I waited and waited. It wasn’t either of the Woodpecker boys that came back, it was Sy, the Blue Jay girl. She shimmered into person-ness. "I am so glad that found I you. Our Tigernae needs help.”

“But I thought iron didn’t hurt you.” I managed to say, with my throat tightening up.

“He didn't want to worry you.”

Fuck! I was gonna kick his ass when I found him for lying to me!

The Woodpeckers were hanging off a Buckthorn branch, looking down. Sy took me by the hand, dragging me into the brush surrounding the Big Meadow. He was lying curled up halfway between person and deer…any other time I probably woulda been scared shit-less. He looked rather centaur-ish, only with deer legs and antlers, with his man’s torso and arms instead of horse bits. I wasn’t even thinking of looking any closer or at any other parts than I needed. The bandage that had been put on by the paramedic had been soaked through. Hell, he was going to need more than just another band-aid. He was going to hafta have that looked at: he was going to the hospital whether he liked it or not. Somehow or another, three birds and a person were gonna stuff him into a teeny car made of iron, (At least a Fiero was made of plastic)and take him to a vet or to the people hospital to get taken care of. We decided that I would drive to the end of the street, and they’d bring him along the secret path and we’d go...somewhere! I had no idea what kind of ID "The People" would have and asked.

“We have a place where our "normal" papers are kept.” Carl responded.

“Could you get his for me please? We’ll need it for the ER.”

He flew off to get them and was back in a flash of black, white and red. I shoved them in my pocket and ran back to get the car. I was out of breath when I got to the rendezvous spot. I cursed the smallness of the Bug as they shoved him into the car.

Dammit!! I hadn’t given my birds a thought! Shit! “Can one of you stay with the girls? I don’t trust that Larry won’t try and get them.”

The deer man shimmered into full human form and held it for a couple of minutes before he changed to deer and back again, then to half, then to human…I took his hand and he turned his head to look at me with glassy eyes. “You lied to me, you jerk. But we’ll fight about that later. I have to take you to the hospital or at least the vet right now…I have your papers and you should be okay. I can have the bill sent to my house, so don’t worry about that either.”

I stopped quickly at the house to grab my wallet, and check on the girls. Carl, Colin, and Sy were already perched on my chair watching the chickens so I knew they’d be okay. I also dialed the police station informing the watch commander that since last night, the man that had been shot had gotten sick and I was taking him to the hospital. Since it was a gunshot wound, it would be photographed as evidence for my ex’s trial.

It was a short trip, being as the fact that I blew red lights and stop signs and drove like a freaking maniac. I burst through the doors and got some orderlies to help me with getting him out of the car. He was extremely pale and there were now blood smears on the front seats of the rent a bug and on me. Oh boy. I wondered if they could detail that out. They got him into a wheel chair and rolled him inside. I pulled out his papers so that they could check him in. I told the girl at the desk that he had been shot last night and patched up, and the cops knew about it, but obviously something went wrong. They took his vital signs, and typed it into the computer. The check in nurse handed me back his papers. He had his Blood Type listed, the mysterious Cora Crowe as next of kin, and I finally saw his name. My eyes could’ve fallen out!! Pan Stanwood! What an absolutely horrible made up name! Pan was a GOAT man not a DEER man!! I’d hafta talk with him when this was over.

Since I was the one who brought him in, I begged the staff to stay with him, saying that he’d want me to be there. I hoped I wasn't lying.

I had to go over the previous night’s adventure to the ER staff. They plopped him onto a gurney and started an IV. I think I was the only one who caught the hand turning into a hoof for just a second, even though the nurse seemed to stop what she was doing and stare. Dammit! Steel needles, steel bed, all sorts of electronic junk. Oh brother. This was going to be interesting. Iron, iron everywhere, and not a drop of bronze…I think I was getting loopy from lack of sleep and obvious worry. I even thought about asking whether they could find some obsidian knives…

I sat quietly on a stool in the corner. They pumped him full of blood and the usual D5W (I watched Emergency growing up), whatever the dextrose and water solution was called these days. They peeled off the soaked bandage that had been put on the previous night. I felt light-headed like I always did around blood, but determined to see this through. The stitches had pulled open, understandably shape shifting prolly didn’t help hold things together. They swabbed the wound out with something that looked like iodine. Except for some whitening of his lips, he didn’t say a word, but I could tell it stung like Hell.

The nurse dragged over an X-ray machine so that they could see what might be the deal inside. I got booted so that they could do it with out frying everyone’s DNA. I wondered if they could see deer bones or people bones or some of each…They didn’t use film anymore, it was all digital. The bullet could be seen quite clearly even by these non-professional eyeballs. They made a copy of the X-ray for the cops who had now arrived to take their own pictures. It was a steel jacketed hollow point. More fucking iron! Dammit! The cop was explaining that hollow points expanded when they hit the target to cause more damage.

I shivered. "What if it had actually been AIMED at either of us?"

“You’d prolly be dead.” the cop replied. “If he could have aimed correctly. His sights were so off, he’d have been more likely to lose a couple of toes.” I was relieved, sorta.

But I really just wanted the stag man to be okay. A doctor was finally called in and they would be extracting the projectile and saving it for evidence. The cop had his little baggy ready. They put a local anesthetic into "Pan's" upper arm, which got furry and brown for split second because of the damned needle. Couldn’t they have used a sea urchin spine or something? I was the only one watching, thank the Gods. He reached out to me and I took his hand and held it as they worked. It was very close to the humerus and a couple of nerves, but except for a few flinches, grinding his teeth and crushing my phalanges, he was very stoic about their digging around.

When the bullet was washed off, examined, photo’d and dropped into the baggy, we could both relax a bit. At least my ex wouldn’t be getting out any time soon. He was being held in the County lockup. He had no ties to the community and could probably connive someone (cough-my mother-cough) into bailing him out and helping him flee.

The doctor gave him a tetanus shot in addition, then stitched him up very well layer by layer, (I felt more queasy than I thought possible) gave him a prescription for antibiotics, put his arm in a sling, and we walked out with a supply of bandages and more instructions about keeping it clean and dry, how to look for infection, etc. They took him out in a wheelchair, I paid his co-pay with my charge, and a nurse waited until I got the car and brought it around. We got him folded into the Bug and I took off for home.

He shimmered into deer-ness as I waited to make the turn to get onto the main street. I poked his side. A little kid was staring with his mouth open, yanking on his mother’s arm and pointing…My deer man raised a hoof in greeting. I poked him again, HARDER. He shifted into a person. Obviously he couldn’t help it in his weakened state. “But mommy he WAS a deer! And he was in that CAR!!! The lady was driving him and he waved at me!!! MOMMY??!!!” I just KNEW he was gonna be put into time out for lying…even though he was right. Sorry kid!

Carl and Colin were waiting when I pulled up. They wrestled him out of the car, being extremely careful not to touch it themselves. They headed for the backyard. I stopped them. “Wait a second. He’s not going anywhere except straight up to bed.” I pointed them towards the house. I unlocked the door and told them to put him in my bedroom. The second one was sorta messy and I needed to make up the bed, so mine would do for now. There at least was a half bath tucked into the roof line on the second floor so he wouldn’t have to go up and down the stairs if he had to go. Then I wondered if he was house-trained. At least I had Pet Stain remover for when my birds had their infrequent accidents that would help me in that regard.

I was glad that I had gone for a wooden sleigh bed rather than the wrought iron one which had been my other choice. We saw him safely in the bed and I told the Woodpecker boys to keep an eye on him while I went to fill his prescription. There was a phone on the night stand, and the TV remote, a radio, and a bunch of books stacked on the floor. I could pick up the RX in a couple of hours, and maybe hit the market if there was something he wanted, or maybe the pet shop, or the feed store, in case he wanted some wildlife food.

I got back to the house, checked on the girls, and headed upstairs to look at the patient. In sleep, he had gone back to deer form. That must make sleepovers interesting, I thought.

Sy flew onto the window sill and shimmered. “He's very weak. He will heal better this way.”

I hoped so. If I had had any visitors, I’m sure they’d wonder why there was a White Tailed Stag in my bed with his front leg in a sling. It was hot enough that I was thinking of turning on the ac, but I turned on the fan instead. It had plastic blades so that might be okay, I figgered. I faced it so it wouldn’t blow on him, but still could move the air around.

I went downstairs. The birds had all flown away after they saw that their leader was in good hands (What was I, Allstate?). I tried working; I really did, but after an hour, I said fuck it, called in and left a message to tell my boss that I wasn’t feeling well and could I take a couple of days off? I would still check in though.

I grabbed my very late second cup of coffee, and sat out with the girls. They clustered around me and I broke off bits of a stale piece of bread that was going to be toast if I had had time this morning. I HAD really wanted to eat it, but whatever…My Silkie/Cochin rappelled up my leg, snagged the whole thing off my lap and ran for the hills with it. Mayhem or mayHEN, if you’ll pardon the pun, ensued. I laughed so hard at her trying to fend off all comers to her ill-gotten gains that I thought I would pee myself. I heard a clunk from the upstairs window and there was my deer man watching me watching my girls. He obviously had forgotten his lovely rack and whacked the window. He smiled sheepishly and waved. I reciprocated.

I sat for a bit longer, before I went back inside to see what my house guest was up to. I ascended the stairs. He had gotten back into the bed and was resting.

“Are you hungry? Would you like me to make you something to eat? If I don’t have it, I can run out and get it.” REAL deer eat shoots, leaves, and whatever they can filch from your garden. “I have things to make a salad if you’d like…”

“Meat more needs to heal, ponder I.” He probably had that right. So I’d make a run to the grocery story when I picked up his meds. I found some nice tender steak tips marked down, I’d slice em really thin and stir fry them with some oriental veggies. It was close enough for lunch time anyways. It took a while at the pharmacy. I was picking the drugs up for someone else, and they wanted to make sure it was kosher. I had left my home phone and I rather hoped he knew how to use one because they called him. They finally let me pick up the drugs and get on my way.

Once back home, I gave him a dose of the antibiotics. He said that he didn’t need anything for the pain, but would ask for aspirin if he needed it. I didn’t know what a deer’s pain threshold was, or what an NSAID might do to him either. So I’d wait until he needed something. I had baby aspirin in my Chicken First Aid Kit, if it came to that.

I made lunch, the girls came in looking for theirs too, so I gave them some of the veggies. Then shut them into the porch so they couldn’t beg and jump and make pains in the asses of themselves. The dippy Leghorn complained about the ill treatment, not that they didn’t have fans, a radio and a TV of their own…sheesh! Spoiled brat poultry!

I plated the food, then called up the stairs to tell him lunch was ready. I was half way up when he started down. He was back in person form which was good because I had read somewhere that cows could only go UP stairs. I didn’t want to know if it was the same for deer. I only had stainless steel cutlery, but I scrounged up some plastic forks from various fast food places. He smiled approvingly as he settled on the wooden chair. Everything was bite sized so we didn’t have to use knives. I was thinking of him using the arm too much. At least it was his right arm and he seemed to be left handed, like me.

“What this is?” He sniffed at the plate.

“It’s steak tips and veggies stir fried with some teriyaki sauce over rice.”

“Good smells does it.” he commented. I hoped he wasn’t allergic to anything in it as he polished off the serving.

“I have more if you’re still hungry.” I offered.

He held up the plate.“Not eaten this day have I.” He commented as he started in on the second helping.

I sat across the little table from him, trying to stare at him without looking like I actually was.

“Closely looking are you. Sire and Dam tell you not rude is?” My eyes flew to his face. I was busted and blushed enough to make me feel like Rudolph and his red nose. “Care I not. Look wish all you.”

“I hate to think how many people have just stared at you…and it IS rude. I apologize.”

“Friends are we. Fine is it, C’hoar Bihan Durotriges.”

I had done a bit of research. “C’hoar Bihan translated to “Small Sister” or in Breton/Brythonic. I could deal with being called his Little Sister, I guess.

Once lunch was done, I did up the dishes, scraped the few scraps from MY dish into the girls’ bowls and let them back out again. The deer man stood as I finished rinsing the pan. He was taller than I had thought or my ceilings were very low...prolly six of one, half dozen of another.

“Go, must I.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Mated are you to another. Unseemly is it.”

Ferfucksakes!“One more time! I am divorced!! I HAVE NOTHING to do with that asshole who shot you! The matrimonial bonds are broken. I am NOT married anymore!”

I led him into the living room and sat him on the couch.

“Understand this do not I. Mated for life is.”

“Not in the human world these days…Half of all marriages end in divorce.”Or death if you read enough true crime books.

“A shame is that.”

“Some people shouldn’t get married in the first place, others grow apart over the years.”

“Yourself?” he prompted.

“My mother wanted grandchildren and butthead was the likely candidate…”

“Like dam your do not you?” That was a touchy subject.

“Not one bit.” And I found myself pouring out all of the hurt and shame and anger that I had had growing up, including being sent away for a whole summer because I had “issues”. That BITCH was the cause of my whole year‘s worth of magazine subscriptions of “issues”. I was fine being myself, but she wasn’t. Having a “normal” daughter who had a “normal” marriage with a “normal” man would keep her standing with her gossipy old klatch of church going harpies.

He put the non-hurt arm around me and I put my head on his shoulder. It was a wonderful feeling. I had never had such a GIFT given to me. I tried not to break down and cry, but my throat closed and that was ALL I could do. I had never told ANYONE about all that shit. I had thought I’d take it to the grave with me. I was soo embarrassed. I tried to stand, but he wouldn’t let me.

“Release this to needed you. Never Dam yours meet again you.” My deer man was right in that. I would not be speaking to my mother unless it were life or death, and the next time I saw my ex it would be in court, where I hoped he’d be sentenced for a very long time in jail. "Pan" sounded really angry about how I had been treated growing up. Wow! I had told all the professionals the same thing and they had sided with HER…noone had evah sided with ME!

It was getting dark and the girls were straggling in. I had to make sure that they were all present and accounted for. He finally let me up so that I could see to them. Everyone was fine and got their evening lovins. When I turned around he was standing in the doorway to the porch watching. He seemed to do that a lot. Prolly wondering how the other half lived. I must’ve been a curiosity to him as well.

"The People" couldn’t go into a "Natural’s" house unless they were invited. Sorta like Vampyres…the real, blood sucking ones, not the new age, glittery ones. I guess there were lotsa rules. He was able to come into my house without an invite because it had been a special circumstance, I guessed. Other than that, it would’ve been like he had hit a brick wall, or a force field. Carl and Colin had been able to because they were with me and their leader.

He hid a yawn behind his hand. It was still early for me to go to bed, but the day had been a bit of an adventure and I was tired, too. I gave him another antibiotic and sent him on upstairs. I made sure the back door was locked, and the front door too. The windows were okay open.

I didn’t have anything guy-ish for him to wear to bed. He’d have to sleep au naturel. I cleaned off the other bed, and turned down the covers. I shouldn’t have worried. He turned into a deer and settled down on the floor. Guess you couldn’t get too much more au naturel than that. I came in to get something cool to wear for the night because I only had the one fan. “Your room is this? Sleep here must you. Might not insist I?”

“I can take the one just across the way. It’ll be okay.”

“Insist do I.” He stood and shimmered into person-ness. I went quickly into the other bedroom and changed. I returned to my bedroom. He held out his hand, and I took it. He brushed a quick kiss onto my cheek and I climbed into my bed. He shifted back into deer form and laid his head on the mattress next to me. I touched the cool nose, the bristly whiskers and the rough smoothness of his antlers. I turned onto my side so I could get a better view. I noticed a couple of holes in his ears…I ran my fingers over them.

“How’d you get those?” I queried, still running my hands through his somewhat stiff fur.

“Told you captured when?” I nodded. “Tagged was I.” Ouch.

“Did it hurt much?” I kissed my fingers and touched the holes again.

“Pinch like it was. Earrings made I have to fit. From my antlers made.” Neat.I would like to see them sometime. But at least I knew he didn’t have any ickies, like Chronic Wasting Disease, or whatever else deer could get. They tag wild herds to keep track of them too.

“Glad it wasn’t too bad then.”

“Caged was part worse.”

“Again, I’m sorry about that. I guess they were trying to help the deer population and didn’t understand about your People.” He nodded.

I put my arms around his neck and gave him a hug. I must've fell asleep like that. In the morning, I had a human bed partner. Sort of. He was in that half way mode. So the arms that held me were human, and the chest my head was on was human too, all the way down to his waist, but the rest of him was deer. I felt myself tense at the strangeness of having a man in my bed, even if he was a stag, too. He raised his head. “Okay are you? Mind you did not hope I? Comfort needed you. Gave I.” I scratched under his jaw and rubbed his closest ear when he went to full deer. I rolled back over and moved closer to him. I felt safe and warm and just loved and cared for, something I had really never known.

It was quite late when we finally arose. I heard my Leghorn crowing so I knew she was going to be in a bad mood. My night shirt had ridden up and I was glad that I had left my underwear on, but I still could feel the heat of his legs against the back of mine. I reached back and it wasn’t a deer leg I felt, it was a human one! I jumped up and promptly fell onto the floor because I had been tangled up in the sheet. He shimmered into deer-ness and stood in a protective stance on three legs.

“Wrong what is?” he questioned.

“You…you…you were a guy!” I yelped. He looked at me as if I had lost my friggin mind. Maybe I had…it was okay when he was a full deer, or a half a deer but not when he was a full person. What the Hell is wrong with you Elizabeth?! I asked myself.

“That I am also.” He stated calmly. I felt like all my nerves were standing on end. I had to get out of there PDQ!I fled to the kitchen, turned on the coffee and let the girls out. My Leghorn pecked my leg to express her displeasure before she followed her sisters into the yard. I turned around for a second and heard a sharp BaGawk that was soon followed by more! I grabbed the baseball bat.

“You fuck!” I yelled before I was even out the door. I almost stumbled over the phalanx of feathered bodies at the bottom of the stairs. It looked like Larry had brought a friend. Crap! A bunch of chicken loving compadres…a fox, a raccoon and a possum.

“Leader ours is here, heard have we. Keeping for hostage you are? Hurt is he?”

I heard another call and the birds were falling all over themselves to get back in the house. It was Jamaica and Bo along with Colin,Carl,Sy and Cora. I felt that they were friends, or at least interested in keeping things going smoothly. Larry’s bunch, not so much.

“Here am I, Larry.” His words from behind me made me jump out of my skin. “Plotting still see I. Brought rebels more.” He turned his gaze on to each in turn.

“Pete” The fox bowed his head.

“Lola” The raccoon bared her teeth.

“Virgil” The possum immediately flopped over, playing dead. I think I would’ve too, if I had been on the receiving end of that commanding voice.

“Leader weak, needs leader new. Keep to times up.” Lola stated, obviously agreeing with whatever Larry thought. Stupid bitch.

“Kept us safe not have I?” The deer man stated, coming closer to the opposing team. His allies shifted nervously. I still had the bat and I would be damned if anyone would hurt my friends.

“Yourself not.” Larry said. “Cihuatecuhtli killed you almost.”

“Fault hers not.”

“Same. Matters fault not. Did it she did.”

I felt a squeeze on my leg. “Tham!”

“Don't be foolissh. If Larry harms you, it will harm him. Not good.” The Garter Snake said when I picked him up. He coiled around my arm.

This was a fucking Mexican Standoff and I wanted no part of it. It was time that I took back my yard. “Larry, Lola, Pete, and Virgil! Welcome here you are not! Invited you are not! Leave you must!”

All of "The People" looked amazed that I said the words, and in the correct formal way.

“Gasst Ssacre!” Tham swore from my elbow.(I presumed he meant Holy Shit.) The two canids, and the raccoon froze and the possum writhed. All four winked out of sight, like mist in the sun. The deer man’s allies shimmered into people and gathered around me. I was hugged more times than I thought possible. The young birds didn’t know their own strength and I knew I’d have a few bruises, but it was worth it to see the admiration in the stag man’s eyes. I had never realized that reading a crap load of rituals in books would’ve been such a good thing.

He kissed my cheek in front of all the others and I once again felt loved and respected. Tham said something that I didn’t catch. Everyone nodded. The deer man seemed to see me differently for the first time. I didn’t quite know how to interpret the look.

“Your night things still are in you.” I blushed…I hadn’t even thought of anything other than keeping my girls safe. Putting real clothes on hadn’t even crossed my mind.

“Would you all like to come in for breakfast?” I had no idea what I would be serving, but I could figure something out. I had plenty of eggs still, so maybe it was omelettes all around…It was probably late for the birds of prey to be having breakfast, but everyone came into the kitchen.

I seated them at the dining room table and started cooking. I made toast and eggs and brewed another pot of coffee. These were the first guests I had in the house besides the deer man who I had to remind to take his antibiotic. Somehow or another they all had clothing anyways. Naked folks hanging out in my kitchen might’ve really sparked some interest. I sent the girls back out so they wouldn’t beg. I set up plates and plastic silverware.

“Recalled iron, ar keniterv.” Sy said. Ugh...more words for me to look up.

“Ar plach good is she.” the deer man stated fondly, smiling at me.

“Cook good too iss sshe.” Tham stated, patting his stomach. I thanked him with a kiss on his scaly cheek. “I don't think I need to eat for a month.” Colin and Carl looked like they’d never been in a house before. They hadn’t either. They rather talked over one another telling me how they had never remembered being in one even as little boys. I was shocked and I‘m sure it showed on my face. They were children once? Hmm…a mystery to solve. They looked like they were teenagers. Sy looked around that in her late 20‘s. Bo and Jamaica looked a bit older. My house guest might’ve just hit his mid 30’s, near my own age.

I caught the deer man’s warning look out of the corner of my eye. The Woodpecker boys shut up. Interesting that was too…

Sy offered to do the dishes…I didn’t think she had a domestic bone in her body, but it was nice of her to do it. I had another cup of coffee and sat at the table, looking at all the new friends around me: a snake, some birds, and a deer. My mother would have an absolute fucking COW and I was down with that. Sy took my cup and I went upstairs to get dressed. I tossed on an old Tshirt that had a Mountain Lion on it and some old shorts. I would’ve LOVED to have a shower but I had company. I came back down and only the deer man was left. “Thanked again you did they. Reciprocate will to have.”

“That would be nice…” I hedged. I had no problem eating almost anything. I could’ve gone on Fear Factor and chugged the worm shake.

“Tired still am I. Rest more need ponder I.” Prolly was a good idea.

“Okay you go back up and take a nap.”

“Me join you will?” Man, was I tempted. I still had to call into work to check in. I did so, then watched the girls dirt-bathing. It was so peaceful. My birds would be fine if I wanted to join him in bed. There wouldn’t be anything going on. I wouldn’t let it.

I found him in the bed. He had the sheets tucked around his bottom half. I wasn’t going to see if it was deer or human, but he had put his hurt arm back in the sling and that was human all the way up to his chest and face. “Antlers my like do you.” He said, as they shimmered into existence. The tines were bare, but the parts closest to his head were covered in velvet-like skin.

He almost purred as I scratched around the base of them. He pulled me close and once again I felt comforted. “Reason no except like I.” The feeling was mutual: I DID like having someone who I could touch and whom I didn’t mind being held by. He kissed the back of my head and I scooted a little closer, being careful not to be in proximity to his lower half. I didn’t need that to be added into the mix.My deer man, I still couldn’t think of him as Pan Stanwood…sheesh. I kissed his cheek, running my fingers along his antlers before I left. He had gone fully to deer in his sleep.

I checked on the girls. They were in wallows that had to be halfway to China. I left a note on the bedside table. I wanted to get a walk in because the weather was calling for Tstorms in the afternoon.

I suited up, took the rent-a-bug and drove to the Park. It almost seemed like something was missing…well, one of the big draws was sleeping in my bed at the moment. And it looked like I was going to have an escort. The Skunk man was leaning against the Welcome to the Park sign.

“Don't walk too fast.” the skunk begged, as he hugged me.

“I never got to thank you for helping us the other night…”

"It's nothing. You can call me PePe.Like Pepe LePew." I laughed. He shrugged.
We started our walk. It took a while because he kept stopping to rest, but we did alright.

"Is our Tigernae okay? Was he badly hurt?”

“He’ll be fine. The doctors took the bullet out. He just needs to rest and heal.”

I know we got some odd looks, especially when Tham and a Turkey, who told me to call him Mel, joined us. Guess us “Naturals” needed the protection…

"Ar vignoness Dorsset told off Larry.” Tham was telling my companions. “The wordss sshe knew.”

Mel shook his head and set his wattly neck to wobbling. “An enemy she has made.”

“Guys!” I stepped in front of the animal person trio. “I didn’t do it to piss off Larry and his gang. I did it to keep my birds safe from him.”

“How did you know the words?” PePe questioned.

It was my turn to shrug helplessly. “I just did.” There was lots of speculation over that. We had made it all the way back to the start. I thanked them, got into the car and headed home. How DID I know the correct words to say and how to say it so that they just went poof? I must’ve read it somewhere…

I thought back to the Changeling stories in Irish legend and Carl and Colin…was there some truth to that then? I pulled into the driveway, checked on the girls, then went in and sparked up the laptop. Too soon, I was plinking away, reading legends from all over the world. Could my deer man’s "People" really have just stolen all these innocent children? Fuck. I couldn’t help shivering. The poor parents with children that just up and died for no reason…not knowing that their REAL children had been taken away and fostered somewhere/sometime Else.

What the Hell had I brought into my house? Did Mr. Jim know all of this and was okay with it? Fuck fuck fuck I swore, before I burst into tears. I LIKED my deer man.

“C‘hoar Bihan? Okay you are?” He put a hand on my shoulder.

“No…and I don’t think I’ll ever be again…” I sniffled.

He looked over my shoulder at the picture on the screen. It was of a devil stealing a human child and replacing it with one of his own. “Is this what you do? Steal children and replace them with pieces of wood with a Glamour on them? Leave a Faerie child who will die within a few weeks because the parents don’t know how to take care of them?” I was screaming at him. He folded my more than unwilling body into his embrace.

“C‘hoar. Ever not gentle you with?”

“You’re a fucking deer.” I mumbled into his chest. “I’ve never heard of a were-deer.”

He chuckled and I heard the vibration in my heart. Dammit.

He closed the offending window, and took my hand. I didn’t want to go anywhere with him, so I dug in my heels. “Way hard me make this do.” He took me in his arms again. “Eyes please closed.” I didn’t want to do anything he told me. So I kept my eyes open and regretted it. It was almost like going through a StarGate, a WormHole and the scariest roller coaster evah! All at the same time. When we landed he let go of me and I hit the ground. I think I left half my internal organs back at the house. I was woozy and nauseous and dizzy and absolutely awestruck.

It was like the forest where Hansel and Gretel got lost mixed with our Park. He dragged me along the pine needle strewn path. My footfalls were quiet thuds, while his made practically no sound at all. There was birdsong from all around and I could distinguish the different birds’ calls.

I heard a “caw” of a crow from above and a ebony skinned woman shimmered in front of us. “I cannot believe you brought her here.” She scolded.

“Learn must she. No choice did have I.”

“There is always a choice.”

He shook his antlered head. “Time this not.”

“This is the first female you‘ve brought here, Never any other.” The crow woman sighed. “Show her our home, then…”

We continued along. I recognized a couple of "The People" that I had met in the Park. Most of the inhabitants looked shocked speechless. Which was my reaction when I saw his home…if you could call it that…

There was a square lighthouse centred in the middle of an island in a small bay. Around the head lands were some small places made of stone with eyebrow windows. There was also a row of standing stones, a dolmen and a stone circle that looked like it had just been erected. All of the stone had a lovely pink shade to it.

“C‘hoar, my home is this.” I stopped dead as the path coiled along a cliff ending at the moat of a castle that was surrounded by a pentagon shaped wall. The drawbridge was lowered as we approached. The chains that allowed it to fall were of bronze. So obviously iron wasn’t allowed here. There were towers in each of the corners and for some reason it reminded me of what I’ve always pictured Tintagel might’ve looked like and the forest we just walked through would’ve been a pissah place for Lancelot and Guinevere to have met for trysts. Where WAS my mind headed?

I had read more than enough myths to know that if anyone ate or drank at one of the Fae Courts you were up shit’s creek without a paddle. Were they Seelie or Unseelie would be my next question, if I had been able to think at all…I finally stopped dead before I got my feet on the bridge. “I’m sorry, but I can’t go in there…”

The deer man cocked his head. “Why you can not, C‘hoar?”

“If I get trapped in your place, I might not get back home for a thousand years or more. My girls need me and I can’t be gone for all that long because I‘d lose my job too…” What a lame excuse it was. If things were different, I would certainly be happy to poke around…

“Back take you I then.” He put his arms around me and in a flash we were back in the house. “More read, less learn, C‘hoar.” He brought the window back up and pressed me into the seat. “Told tales, right not always. Questions ask can you. Tell will I.” He kissed the top of my head and went back upstairs. He was basically saying go to the horse’s, umm, deer’s mouth, if I had questions to ask.

Was he telling me that most of what I read was bullshit? Hmm. According the clock we had only been gone for a couple of minutes, but it seemed like maybe an hour. Okay, so that was true…would I hafta make a list of the real stuff and the BS stuff? I might hafta or I’d go nuts.I peeked out at the girls…they were still fine, shaking off, creating clouds of dust. My brain hurt and my insides felt scrambled. I called the girls in, added fresh water and some millet sprays for them to enjoy, closed and locked the back door and went back upstairs.

Damned deer man was waiting for me. Fuck. I needed to think things over. If I was involved with ANY of the hidden realms and their denizens, I was in way way WAY over my head. The only protection would be iron or steel. But that would hurt the good guys too.

I got into the bed, tucking the sheet around me like I was a blintz. He kissed the top of my head, shifted into deer mode and he went to sleep. I rested comfortably with him curled around me.

Nano 2011~Chapter 5

2011-12-10T13:26:00.000-08:00

I got up and started my day even though it was way way WAY before my alarm. I felt rested anyways, surprisingly enough. I let the girls out, and sat in my usual chair with my cup of coffee and muffin. I was rather amazed I wasn’t wasting away because ALL of them were begging...Dang! The Silkie/Cochin was even trying to rappel up my leg. I even tossed a few crumbs to the chipmunk that was sitting on a weathered stump.

After I drained my mug and refilled it, I let the girls stay out. They should be okay if I went inside and took a shower. The window looked out on the backyard in any case. I stripped and turned the water on. I lathered my hair after checking outside once. I rinsed and peeked. Okay, so I was paranoid. I didn’t want Larry helping himself to a free chicken dinner. I would beat the ever-loving SHIT out of him and make him into a fucking coat. If he wouldn’t listen to what his leader said, neither would I.

I repeated as I stood and rinsed off. I used an Apple-y scented shower gel.. It always made me feel nice and spring-y actually. I checked the girls again. The chipmunk was back and seemed like it had brought some friends. I had a mixed flock of songbirds, a couple of robins, a cardinal and a blue jay. I figured my birds were going to be fine.

I found a tank top and some ratty shorts because, except for my walk, I wasn’t going anywhere special. It was going to be in the upper 90’s with way too much humidity. I got my gear together, wondering why I didn’t shower AFTER I walked, but whatever. I told the girls to take care, got in the car, and drove to the park entrance.

They’d open the main gates at 9 so I had a bit of a walk to get to the trails. But that was okay. It was paved like the bike path so there was nothing to it, and it was a good warm up. I locked the car, turned on my music, slung my water bottle in its holder around my body and started. I had my headset around my neck so I could hear if someone snuck up behind me, but could still sing along with the music.

“Come Alive” by the Foo Fighters was playing as the deer man met me at the start of the Scout trail. Interesting synchronicity, I thought.

“Expect to see you, I did not this day.” He said.

“I try to walk almost every day. If I can get out early enough, it’s not too hot and I can go longer.”

I found myself telling him about the doctor’s orders, and that I had actually lost about 40 pounds just by walking every day. “Fine you look to me.” I felt the blood rush to my face. I would never be a lollipop head, thank the Gods. I loved to eat too much. I was fine with my roundness, there was just not so much of it. And I did get winded a lot less. I tripped on a root by not paying attention, but he grabbed me before I got a mouthful of dirt. “Not graceful you are.”

“Understatement. I can trip over my own shadow.”

He gave a quiet laugh, released his iron grip on my waist, and took my hand. It was nice to hold hands with a friend…Wow! That really had never been a part of my life: a friend, a companion…

No one had been good enough for me growing up…so I didn’t have any friends. Once I was on my own, things had changed radically. I partied, I over indulged…but I had booze buddies, acquaintances and work pals rather than friends.

We strolled along the Scout path with its rock walls, ups and downs and bridges. I saw animals that would’ve run and birds that would’ve flown away stay and watch us go by. They cheeped and squeaked greetings to my companion. The deer man just inclined his head, taking his due as the leader of them. A chickadee swooped down and landed on our intertwined fingers. I stopped short and pulled my fingers away from the sharp little talons, but he seemed to listen to the little bird. “Mate that is yours is returned.” Dammit!

“We’re divorced. He’s not mine anymore…I’m not mated to him.” Shit…I was talking like THEY did.

“Not natural he is. Like him, I do not.”

“Me either.” I replied.

“Error of his ways he must be taught.” That didn’t sound good.

“You’re not going to hurt him, are you?”

“Too kind of heart are you, C’hoar Bihan Dorset.” How the Hell he figured out my last name wasn’t even worth going over and I didn‘t know what the other words meant. “Here wait for me you will.” I went back a bit on the trail, found a flat stone and sat. Even if my ex WAS a dick, he didn’t need to be beaten up.

“Will hurt him not he sshall.” I leaned back and almost fell off the rock. Okay, NOW I was listening to a snake. It was a rather LOVELY Garter Snake though and snakes had never given me the willies. “Tham, may I be called.”

“Nice to meet you.” I stuck out my hand as he shimmered into person-ness. That right there shoulda freaked me out and caused me to run to the hills, but I just moved my bum over so that the very skinny, non-blinking man could sit next to me. He shook my hand and his felt just like a snake skin I had touched once. “Run away mosst perssonss would. I am impresssed. Like sserpentss you do?”

“I’m not afraid of you, if that’s your question.”

“Mosst perssonns fear my kind.” I shrugged.

“You’re not too venomous. Why would I?”

The snake man‘s, Tham’s, face, broke into a huge smile. “Our Tigernae hass chossen well. Ass did Mr. Jim."

A blue jay was hanging around, too. “Ssy! To ssee you nice it iss.”

The bird shimmered into a slight woman with jet black hair with white and sapphire blue stripes wearing blue jeans and a black shirt. “I don't know about that, Tham. She is new to us and we are new to her."

We chatted about silly things until the deer man returned. “Sy! Fine family is, presume I.”

She nodded. “Chicks are growing too quickly.”

“Not upsetting you was Tham?”

“I happen to like some snakes.” The serpent man blushed, shimmered, and slithered into the underbrush. Sy, the Blue Jay was next to go, leaving the stag man and myself sitting too closely on the rock.

“Trampled your mate wish I.”

“Yeah he IS a jerk. Did you talk to him as yourself, or as a deer?” Which one was his TRUE form? Shit! Did I really want to know?

“Man to man spoke we.” Oh boy…that must’ve gone over well with my ex. He didn’t like confrontations. He’d run away, then work himself up into a lather to do something stupid later on.

“Goring him might’ve worked better.”

The deer man snorted. “True could be it. You leave alone will now he?” I certainly hoped so.

“I’ve not heard of a deer killing a person here, but I would prefer it wouldn’t be someone I know.”

“Last resort violence is. Use it do not like to I.”

I didn’t like to either. Some circumstances just called for it. Like the assholes who didn’t quite get the message to fuck the Hell off…and to take a large sidestep into the nearest black hole.

“Finish walk you would like with me?” The deer man asked. I still did need to, so I agreed. He reminded me a lot of Mr. Jim and I missed him again…dang. “Why sad you are?”

“I miss Mr. Jim and you reminded me of him.”

“Alike are we?”

“Not really, but somewhat.”

“Natural too he was.”

“He didn’t turn into anything did he?”

The deer man chuckled. “A person just.”

“How do you know if someone’s ‘natural‘?”

“Things many. Animals like. Gardens grow…” That left me off. “Heart kind. Earth love. In you things these are.”

“Even though I’m from the city?”

“Live now here. To you called we. Like you more need we.”

Even with all the hippy dippies jumping on the eco bandwagon, there was still more places that needed saving.

“Are there other places like the park here that have your kind?”

“World all over.” That was good to know. I had read of some of the old Shamans in the rainforest who would die to protect their homes…maybe it just wasn’t their homes…

“Show you day some like to.”

“That would be really nice, thanks.”

“Welcome are you.” Then I thought of how to get a passport to some of those places and how much it would cost…That certainly put a damper on the travel. And I’d need someone to watch the girls who wouldn’t eat them. I couldn’t believe I was even thinking that way…dang!

It was an easy time with the deer man…we walked and talked…it was amazing that I could have a conversation with a person that didn’t involve accounts receivables, accounts payables, IRA’s, or taxation, or how much money they wanted or how long until the next big thing came around the corner and dropped into their laps…

We discussed the weather, whom I had met so far of the people, how they had taken their names…mostly from their Latin names. White tailed deer were Odocoileus Virginianus. He didn’t look like a “Virgil” or an “Odo” or a “Lee” to me…He would have a more “regal” name, I thought. I knew that hawks were “Buteo” but didn’t know the rest of it. Common Garter Snakes were Thamnophis and Blue Jays were Cyanotta, so those made sense for “Tham” and “Cy” to be used as names.

“Thinking hard are you.” I had sort of stopped in the middle of the path while I was going through things in my mind. I really couldn’t do two things at once cuz Gods know I could trip and fall, or walk into a tree because I wasn’t paying any attention. I had almost yanked his arm/leg out of the socket.

“Sorry.” I muttered. “I was trying to figure out what to call you…” He smiled.

“Guess it not you might not easily.” All of a sudden I was reminded of Rumplestiltskin.

“If I guess your name do I get a prize?” He laughed out loud.

“Not I think, C’hoar Bihan Dorset.”

“Damn…”

“Remember I too the tale of weaving straw to gold. Read we all can. Learn did from books we. School went to I. Language yours difficult is.” True, dat. Modern English grabbed words from all sorts of other languages.

“What is your original language since it‘s not English?”

“Brythonic, Gallicum, Frankish called it is these days I remember not.” I’d hafta do some research…because neither of those words sounded familiar to me while the last one did. And it certainly explained the strange wording that he and his people used. And the completely unknown words that he used in front of my last name…hmm.

“Thinking done you are?”

“I guess so.”

“Finish your walk may we, then.” We had gone around the path a couple of times and he escorted me back to my car. My ex, being the swell fellow that he was, scratched swears and epithets into my car’s paint…I swore loud and long. My companion cringed. “Speak like that maouzen should not do…”

“Yeah, well, but look at my car!” I yelled.

“Fix it can not you?”

“Yes. But it still sucks that I’ll need to have to take the time off of work.” I noticed that he didn’t get too close to the cars. I recalled that the Fae didn’t like iron and cars were made of steel which was made from iron…

“Sorry I am suggestion took he not.” I was too…I’d hafta take pictures when I got home. More evidence against my ex. I had hoped that having the stag man talk to him would’ve made a difference, but obviously it hadn’t. It had just gotten him madder. Shit. Back to the police station, I’d go…

I’d hafta go to court, the Officer told me, since the ijit was keeping up the harrassment. I would have to bring everyone who had contact with him in for statements too…How the Hell was I going to stuff a deer in the Tempo, I’d like to know.

I headed on back home with a date to appear. My girls were fine, like I knew they’d be. Since when had I trusted my beloved birds with strangers? But they weren’t really strangers, were they? They were more aptly called neighbours.

I called in and worked for a while. Then I took a break and photographed the graffiti on my car. It would be going right into the shop as soon as I uploaded the pictures and saved them to a disk. At least the repair shop had an opening and my insurance would let me have a loaner for a couple of days. It was a Lime Green Volkswagen Bug…WITH the optional flower…Dollars to donuts, my deer man would try and eat it. I burst out laughing, startling the girls. It felt good to laugh. I almost thought that I had forgotten how.

I finished work, called in, and started dinner again. It was just a salad with tomatoes, and cukes and Italian dressing. I washed the dishes, then went to the park to get another walk in. It was still hot, but the sun was going down. I went to the end of my street, hit the secret path and went in. I went by the thicket where the deer man had grabbed me that one time. I couldn’t tell if anyone was in there because it was so thick. I kept on going, singing along with my songs. It was harder when I was going up the hills, but I did better than I had before. I heard someone coming up behind me and moved to the side of the bike path. “Move too quickly, you do…” panted the Park Person. “Out of shape, I must be…” I stopped and found a bench so he could take a breather. He bent over, rested his longish nailed hands on his knees and gasped some more. I noticed the white stripes in his sleek black hair. I had NEVER seen a skunk in a hurry, so it must’ve been important.

“What’s the problem?”

“Your mate.”

“That God damned sonofabitch!” I snarled.

“I think YOUR tail is up.” the skunk stated with a snicker.

I HAD to laugh. “I guess so. If we need to get there quickly, shouldn’t you sorta “change” and I could carry you? Just let me know where I need to go.”

"They are nearest the Blue Trail by the lake.” The man shimmered into his skunk shape. I plucked him off the bench and we headed that way. Now, I know that skunks stink. They always will. He WASN’T bad smelling at all, which sort of surprised me. He really wasn’t any worse than a ferret which is in the same family. I held him like he was a cat, sort of cuddled in my arms. I took the small shortcut that he pointed out and we were there quickly. My ex had the deer man at the end of the dock against the railing. I dialed 911, while standing in the brush still, and told them that my ex was holding another person hostage at the dock in the pond at gunpoint.

The deer man was speaking quietly, trying to reason with him, but my ex was ranting about how HIS wife didn’t need another man, only needed himself. And that he should stay away from someone else’s property. “Property?!“ I ground my teeth and sorta squozed my furry burden. He squealed at me, and I apologized before settling him on the ground.

I strode over, and yelled. “Hey asshole, why don’t you leave the guy alone?”

He spun and the gun was pointed my way…oh shit! “He fucking started it! Telling me that you could talk to whomever you wanted. You're my WIFE!”

“Oh for the Gods’ sakes, you jackass! You married me for my money and I married you because my mother badgered (no offense, I told the skunk) me into it. You didn’t love me and I sure as Hell didn’t love you. You are a worthless piece of shit! You’re trying to scare me into going back to you, well that’s NEVER going to happen…cuz you’re gonna end up in jail being a bum chum to someone named Rico for stalking me. As for this gentleman here, he has every right to be in the park as I do and not be hunted and assaulted because you have a stupid idea trapped in your fucking empty head…”

He came off the dock and started towards me. “Okay, now what dumbass?” I thought to myself.

“Since I can’t have you, noone else will either!” The deer man gasped at the threat, and the skunk, blending into the shadows raised his tail in alarm.

“That’s the OLDEST line ever, and it’s still bullshit!” I told my ex bravely, watching the gun, and hoping I didn't disgrace myself by shedding my intestinal lining on the ground.

I saw him pulling the trigger in slow mo. My friend shimmered into deer form, barreled towards him, and knocked him flat on his face right in the bulls-eye range of the black and white stinky kitty! Mr. Skunk got him dead centre. The gun barked and all of us jumped. I couldn’t figure out where the bullet went. It was just in time too as the prowl cars pulled up.

“Oh God!” One of the flat foots bawled.

“He’s not going in MY car“ the other one argued.

They called for a "paddy wagon" instead.

“So what happened here?” One cop asked while we waited. The stag man courteously let me talk first.

“You know the fact that my ex has been stalking me, well he thought that this man here was having a torrid love affair with me. We’re not, we’ve only just met and we’ve taken to walking together, but we’re just acquaintances…”

The skunk snickered, and the cops all looked down at the animal.

“Shoved this man when gun turned he on Damzel Dorset and skunk fell over he. Shoot her tried to he!” The stag man told them.

“We got it on the call.” I had specifically left the phone on so that they could get it. “You DID sort of bait him…”

“Well, I didn’t want him to hurt an innocent person.” My deer man looked so innocent that it was painful…

The paddy wagon came in and the crew tossed my ex in the back. He was still gagging and crying and bleeding from a cut lip. “You both will have to come down to the station and make formal statements."

I was okay with that, but my deer man, not so much, but he got into the back of one of the squad cars and tried to get comfortable with all that iron around him. I would take my rent-a-Bug. They took me to the car and I drove to the station once again. It was becoming my home away from home, and I wasn’t really amused about that.

We were taken into separate rooms and quizzed about what had happened. I was sure that they weren’t keen on the coincidence that I was in the right place at the right time to help out. They said that if my ex pressed charges that the deer man could be brought up for assault. Neither of us had thought of that, for sure. It wouldn't have crossed MY mind...

The cops didn’t even want the guy in the holding cell. Not that I blamed them. Another cop took him and cleaned him up and hosed him off, but he still stunk. And even worse, when the gun went off, it had ricocheted off a rock and grazed my deer man! He had been checked out after bleeding a bit on the seat. I guessed the adrenaline rush had made him not feel it. An EMT slapped a bandage on him.

It was very late when we were finally released. At least I didn’t have to take him to the Wildlife Centre. He was given a couple of aspirin for any pain he might have, and to see a real doctor in the next couple of days. I wondered what that might do to his shape shifting abilities.

“Leave at the Park can you me.” he stated when we got nearer my street. “Fine will be I.”

“I’ve read that some of the Fair Folk don’t like iron…Is that from the Milesians defeating the Kelts’ bronze weapons with their own of iron?” I asked, just to know.

He snapped his head around. “Read that too have I. Shape changers moon metal fear…” He snorted. “Codswollop!”

“Yeah, I sorta thought it was bullshit too.”

“Uncomfortable us make, but kill not.” That was nice to know. “Crawling skin caused by iron.” I had that same reaction to Hematite, which was an Iron ore. I also wondered if that was part of the Like Calls to Like deal…

The chain across the gate was still down after the cops had come and gone, so I was able to drive all the way to the Lake itself. I made the loop so that I could head back out once he unfolded himself from the rent-a-bug. He didn’t seem to be in a rush though…

“Afraid of dying, was not I, C‘hoar Bihan. YOU of dying was I.” I felt myself blush. He brushed a kiss onto my temple. “Sleep well.” He shimmered into deer-ness and blended into the woods.

Sleeping well wasn’t on my to-do list for the night. What if he had been killed by my ex? What if HE had killed my ex? What if my ex had killed ME? Who would’ve taken over the secret of the People? Holy Shit! When was it MY business anyway? It was MY business because I had agreed and because I was a “Natural”…fuck me naked.

Nano 2011~Chapter 4

2011-12-04T16:25:00.000-08:00

The racket of bird alarm calls and the ba-Gawking of my girls brought me back to reality. I booked it out of the house and into the backyard. I hadn’t even paid attention to anything else because I was lost in thought. Shit! I grabbed a broom, like that would do any good against anything larger than a chipmunk…pfft.

If nothing else, I could sweep up the feathers that were left...The only thing different was the flock of wild birds in the trees around the yard and every one of them was facing the same way. My ex was trying to get into the yard and there was a Blue Jay dive bombing him. I had the police on speed dial and rang them. They were there within minutes. The bird hadn’t let him get away…it kept him pinned against the hotwire. At least I could hope that he'd make himself extra crispy the way he was yelping.

After he had been cuffed and stuffed, I turned to check on the girls and the wild birds. My girls were still there, staring out the gate at the most recent source of amusement, but the wild ones had flown the coop so to speak. I looked up and there was a single blue jay watching me. With nothing else to lose, I thanked the crow in a blue pin striped suit. It cocked it’s head at me, like it had understood, and flew off. The girls were all talking amongst themselves, but they were all fine.

We trooped into the house and I sat and played some puzzles on a game site…I kept losing to the computer…oh well. At least it was a free site and I wasn’t losing any real money. Not that I didn’t have enough to lose a couple of hundred, but that would be assinine.

I made myself some lunch. I don’t have a clue what it even was. The girls wanted to get back outside because it was nice and they wanted to wallow…parts of my yard resembled moonscapes…but they enjoyed themselves. I went and checked the mail in the box. There was a letter with no address or postage on it. The writing was extremely fancy, like it was torn from a page of the Book of Kells The spelling was archaic…but I was able to figure it out. It read that “The People” needed some supplies, and that since Mr. Jim had thought enough of me to trust that I would keep their secret…if I could get some food items for them…

I had seen Mr. Jim bring lots of bags into his house a few times since I had been there and I KNEW that he couldn’t eat it all himself. He must’ve been buying for the strange people from the funeral. That was the reason why he had such a huge garden! Duh! It hadn’t been just for him; they had been taking some too…

I then wondered how long these “People” had been living in the park and how many “Natural” people had helped them out over the years. I was instructed by the note to just leave the bags at the back of the yard. Someone would come for them.

I was reluctant because I was afraid that someone would see the pick up, or wild animals would take the stuff, or they might get hurt on the hotwire, but I couldn’t turn it off because my girls needed that protection…maybe they wouldn’t…I’d hafta think about that…I thought about how many times I had fed the wild birds and finally convinced myself that this really couldn’t be too much different. I’d do it this once, and see what happened. I gave them that reply on the back of THEIR note, placing it in a small indentation in the trunk of one of the sycamores out in the back yard. Pretty soon I saw a squirrel make off with it. I could only hope that it wasn’t taking it for nesting material.

Going through the rest of the mail, I found that my divorce was finally final! Yays!!! It was a great feeling to not be married anymore. Well, at least not to my ex…Maybe I’d find “Mr. Right” instead of “Mr. He’s just perfect for you…you gotta marry him and give me grandkids before you‘re too old…My friends will be so proud…” I ground my teeth. Fuck that! I’d rather “live in sin” and be happy than be trapped like that again. Maybe I could find a young lover for every day of the week and two for Saturday. I'd have alot to learn though...wonder if they'd mind if I took notes...

There were a few bills to be paid, which I did. My electric and water were negligible because I used rain water for my unsuccessful gardening attempts, and except for fans and the laptop and the TV on occasion and the usual appliances, I lived pretty simply. The girls had their own fans in the summer and a baseboard heater that came with the house in the winter, but I would only use it on the rare January days when their water froze over. My pay was direct deposited and I could even track it online. Yeah, I know, I was a completely wired individual these days. But I was happy, contented even, and that was what really mattered.

I decided that I needed to continue the walk that had been so rudely interrupted by my ex. I left the fan on, and the girls with the radio going. I drove to the parking lot and turned on my MP3 player. It wasn’t too crowded because it was hot and sticky, but if I stayed on the nature trails, I should be okay. Then I had to choose which trail I wanted to do…Green had all the plants and trees. Scout was rocky and hilly and rather hard so that was definitely out. Blue took you down to the Lake, so that was a possibility. Purple was flowers and butterflies and the big meadow…hmm…Decisions, decisions…

Dark and shady made the choice for me. I took the Blue path and then would hit the Green where they met. I got almost all the way through, then had to stop for a break. Sweat was just pouring off me and I wanted to kick myself for not finishing up in the morning…I sat on a bench in the little glade they called the Chapel in the Woods. I never knew of anyone being married there, but whatever…I stared out at the pond watching the Swans and the Geese and the Ducks paddling around, drinking my bottle of water. I heard a chittering next to me, but didn’t turn to look. There were chipmunks galore this summer…You couldn’t swing a cat by the tail without hitting a dozen…I DID finally look when there was a small one tugging at the hem of my shorts, looking up at me with a piece of paper in it’s paws…The hair on the back of my neck stood up and I twisted my head all around to see if anyone was near. Thank the Gods, noone was. It was a reply to MY reply. It would be fine, the missive said. And that they would be sending me a list. Okay, I told the Gerbil with Racing Stripes. Dear Gods, a messenger Chipmunk, who the Hell woulda thunkit?

I sat for a couple more minutes. I knew that there was a Deer-man, a Bird-woman or two, and a chipmunk person…It just didn’t seem real…Maybe in some Charles DeLint Newford story, but to me?!! Hell NO!!! I was a realist, a cynic, level headed as a friggin’ rock!! WHY was this happening to me? Had I done something wrong? Or was it because I was finally doing something RIGHT?!!! Shit…That thought would be mulled over for quite a while.

I headed back to the car. There was a piece of paper under the windshield wiper. I took it and checked out the “People’s” shopping list. It was pretty simple. Salt, Pepper, Milk, Eggs, Bread, Peanut Butter. Some vegetables too. Rice, Pasta…necessary things…What did I expect: a salt lick and some Purina whomever Chow? I guessed it could go either way. A raccoon waved it’s hand in farewell as I got into the Tempo. I just shook my head. I wished I had someone to talk to about this. Mr. Jim would’ve understood. I sighed…That is probably why I was “allowed” into his inner circle…I guess like really DID call to like…I had always been an "earthy" person, more comfortable digging in the dirt, being outside, working in the yard and all of that non-girly stuff…

I went home, made myself and the girls some supper. I washed the dishes and set up the coffee machine for the next day. I then headed out to the market. I took the list with me and bought what was on it for my otherworldly neighbours in the park. The amount wasn’t staggering, just larger than I usually got. Their other source of outside help was gone and I had nothing to fear from them. Well, that was a shock right there…I guess I really didn’t. Even the deer man had helped me get away from my ex…scared the shit out of me doing it, but he HAD helped me.

It took a few trips to get all the bags in from the car, then into the Igloo Ice chest that I had snagged from Mr. Jim’s. I had never seen him use it, so I presumed that his “People” were the ones who benefited from it. I filled it with ice and added the milk and butter. Since all my girls were laying except for the Silkie/Cochin ninny, I had a couple of dozen eggs to give away. I marked that down on the paper.

I put it out by the corner of the backyard, where the fence, and the small open patch before actual woods started, met. I really wanted to see the pick up but decided against it. The girls had put themselves to bed, while I sat and tried to read. It didn’t hold my interest. Neither did the baseball games, or even playing on the computer.Finally, I said "Fuck it" and went to bed.

I was woken by tapping outside the window. “You have GOT to be kidding!” I groused. The sun was out, but that was no reason to be up yet…the alarm hadn’t even gone off! The tapping got louder and moved to the glass. I flew to the window, startling the yellow spotted woodpecker with the red lipstick(beakstick?) smears on the sides of it’s face. “What?!” I yelled. It cocked it’s head at me and stuck out it’s tongue before leaving a note on the sill, and flying off.

I took the paper and turned on the coffee. There was still an hour of rack time before I was sposta be up…ugh. I read the note while incinerating my taste buds.It simply read, "We Thank You. And your birds for their eggs." Shit! I was ashamed of myself. I had no good reason to snap at anyone BUT myself. I was more than tempted to check into the White Jacket Hotel once again or at least head back into the wilds of the city. But who’s to say there weren’t people posing as animals, or was that the other way around, there too? Time for more coffee before I got into THAT philosophical discussion with myself. I let the girls out to roam and do chicken stuff. Then I wondered if THEY were people in bird suits too. I reached for the phone, ready to dial 911, and have myself committed for an extended stay…

I usually didn’t let the girls stay out when I wasn’t there, but I figured that they’d be safe enough, if the “Park People” were keeping an eyeball out for them. I crossed my fingers.

I went to the path I where I had started yesterday. I was basically tiptoeing around it. That made me mad enough to see blood! Would I have to be afraid of that fucking idiot that I had married and divorced for the rest of my life?!! He probably hadn’t even gotten bailed out yet. I went around the trail and onto the bike path so fast, I was amazed that I didn’t leave flaming sneaker prints. I didn’t hear anything over the pounding of my heart, and the slap of my feet against the road. When my legs reminded me that they weren’t meant for the Death March of Bataan, and started to cramp, I had to practically crawl to a bench to rest. I sucked down some water from my bottle, wishing that the lake was closer. Dipping my feet in the cool, snapping turtle infested water wouldn’t have hurt too much more at the moment.

I felt a presence behind me, but didn’t turn. I didn’t need to as the deer-man sat next to me on the bench. I looked towards the ground expecting to see hooves. He wiggled his perfectly normal looking toes and his chuckle made me snap my gaze up to his brown eyes. When they say that someone had doe eyes I knew what they meant finally…They were a rich brown somewhere between a Hershey’s chocolate bar and a Special Dark bar and had the gentlest of expressions. He was wearing brown sandals and cargo shorts and a plain v neck t-shirt. He looked like any of the denizens of my new hometown. I guess that’s what they could do if they had to. I just had to examine him again. His hair was short and a reddish brown color. “Know wish to search for antlers you do.” He said in a low toned, quiet voice. “I have them not in this form. Nor hooves nor a tail.” I wasn’t going to check out his ass to make sure. “Thank you I helping us for. Appreciative my people of your kindness are.”

“You’re welcome.” I replied. Of course, I had a million and one OTHER things to say that weren’t as polite, but were nosy and invasive, but I HAD sorta just met him.

“How many of there ARE you?” I finally asked, after looking him over thoroughly again.

“Not as many as once there was, I fear. In our other forms we’re more like as not to hunted be, or house pets by killed, or automobiles.” I cringed, thinking of werewolves that changed back to human when they died. That would really muck up someone’s day…”But Officer, I really DID hit a chipmunk…I woulda known if I hit a naked person…” “Tell it to the Judge buddy…”

“Are you like the King or something?”

“No, selected was I for position of leader for a year and a day…no one else has spoken up so am I still.”

“How long’s it been then?” I could see him thinking hard.

“20 Seasons. Ponder I.”

“20 Years?!” I yelped.

“No, Seasons-cold, green, hot, red.” Ahh. Winter, Spring, Summer and Fall, duh.

“Oh…like 5 years then.”

“As you say.”

“How’d you meet Mr. Jim?”

“As you did us…”

“How do you pick who’s going to help you?”

“More is it that each other find we…”

His speech was archaic, almost Yoda-like…but I could figure it out…I HAD read Beowulf in the Old English and the Volsunga Saga in Icelandic, and The Canterbury Tales in Middle English. That’s not even taking into account the Egyptian Hieroglyphics, and the language of the Mayans and Aztecs. Some things just stay with you, I guess. My mother had never read Fairy Tales because they would twist your mind so that you saw things behind every tree (like wtf was wrong with that?) or Winnie the Pooh with the talking animals or Old Mother West Wind or almost anything that would make a child interested in nature and the world around them. Dull dull dull things like Dickens’ Great Expectations, Bronte’s Wuthering Heights. I brought a sappy romance home one time from the library and I had to take it back because she didn’t approve of it.

“Can you leave the park? Like go other places?” Well, that was a stupid question because they came to Mr. Jim’s funeral, and to my house. “Never mind…I know the answer.”

“For a short time might we leave…not away for weeks or months…Longest was five days once. Caught and caged was I.” The anger in his voice made me want to comfort him. I put my hand on his arm, involuntarily.

“I am sorry.”

He looked down at the place where we connected. “Touched we are not…hmm.” His eyes flicked to mine quickly. I moved to pull it back, but he held it there with his free hand. “Missed this have I, ponder I.”

When a crow flew over and called, he abruptly slid away on the bench, moving his arm away like he was guilty of a crime.

“Don’t tell me…That’s your girlfriend.” I joked.

“No. Mated to her not am I .” I was sorta relieved. “A mate yet have not do I.” I was even more relieved…but what was I thinking?! I just got my divorce in the mail. I was sitting like a sweating lump of jello near a guy that could change into a deer…wtf?

I stood. “I have to get back to my girls and get some work done…Nice talking with you.”

“Walk with you might I to trail, then?” No skin off my nose, I thought.

He moved with light deer-like steps(duh) while I felt like an elephant wearing platform clogs…sheesh. We got there quicker than I thought possible. He held the bramble aside so I could go through without getting scratched. “Again may I see you?”

“I DO come here often…”

He smiled a dazzling smile, lifted a hand in farewell, and I headed home. I went straight to the back yard and there was a hawk eyeballing my girls. The brazen thing was sitting right on a fence post. They were all huddling en masse under the Brahma whos hackles were all out. I marched over to the bird of prey who didn’t move except to look down its beak at me. “I am NOT after your King. All we did was talk, so don’t be a jealous bitch!” I turned and ushered the girls back inside.

Within a few seconds there was a knock at the front door. There was a thin twenty something man with long arms standing on the top step. He had a well trimmed beard with tinges of red in his hair. “Jealous, not am I. Female dog, most assuredly not. With the stag mated, No.” I didn’t know whether to shit or offer him a mouse. My Brahma was all flared out, just like she had been when the hawk was watching them out back. All he had to do was drool at one and I would let her loose on him. Another hawk stooped and shimmered. Oh ferfucksakes… She shook her dyed red shoulder length hair and examined my flock. “Good to eat nothing here, Bo. And hers they are.” I saw one of the new neighbours gawking at my company because I really didn’t have any.

“JW’s” I said, waving and wearing a big fake smile.

“Your birds watch shall we.” The hawk man named Bo stated.

“Not too closely, I hope.” I shot back.

“Food they are not. Yours they are.”

“Delicious eggs were.” The female said. “Off we must be.” With another shimmer, both were back to hawks and flying off.

I took a shower, then called in and started to work. I worked through lunch even with the pecking, biting, clucking, and climbing up my legs…They HAD food and water in their bowls…sheesh. I finished at the usual time, called in, and started dinner glad I had never had a taste for venison. We had Suddenly Salad because it was too hot to cook much and I added some fake beef (Can’t call it chicken with them staring at me) and corn on the cob.

I let the girls out again just in time to see a grey-brown dog stop short as it spotted us. “If you are one of the People, let me know, or I’ll clobber you and wear your tail as an pendant.” I reached behind me for the aluminum baseball bat that I bought for such a contingency and advanced toward the coyotl (that IS the correct spelling from Nahuatl) From out of the corner of my eye, I saw a buck clear the electric fence without breaking a stride and get between me and the canine. The coyotl sat, then both shimmered into people shape. The coyotl still LOOKED like a coyotl with a long sharp nose and shifty eyes.

“Larry! Keep away told you were.”

“Looking just was I. Curious was I.”

The deer man snorted. “Food they are not.”

“Tail mine thou would wear, Cihuatecuhtli(The Lady in Nahuatl)” He turned his yellow eyes to me. No wonder they wore sunglasses and hats. “Hmmph” He scoffed. “Attempt it, then.” I was more than up for the challenge, and raised the bat in a stance that would‘ve made Albert Pujols proud.

The deer man stepped in front of me again. “This allow shall not I. Hurt him not you will.” Shit. I lowered the bat.

“He goes after my birds, I’ll flatten his ass. I don’t care WHAT you say.” I told the deer man.

“Heard the lady did you not?” He stated. The coyotl shimmered and scampered away.

“He was full of shit, wasn’t he? He was going to try and eat my birds.”

The deer man shrugged. “He is Coyote.” In most American mythologies, Coyotl was just like Wile E. Coyote. Too smart for his own good and all his plans blew up in his face.

“I met a couple of Red Tailed Hawks this morning, too.” I commented to keep talking to him.

“Jamaica and Bo. Good that is. Mates they are and heart friends to mineself.”

“Do all of you have names?” He nodded, but ignored my prompting look.

Ahh, a stag man of mystery…”Well enough I know you not.” I could understand that. At least I knew three of them: Jamaica and Bo the Redtails and Larry the Coyote.

“Comfortable, now are they.” He indicated my girls grazing on the lawn. The Silkie/Cochin wandered over and pecked at his ankle. He scooped her up and scratched her neck right at where the back of her little comb attached…I could almost see her melt. Then I had the most unexpected thought of how his touch would be with me. Eek!! There were things to take care of that if that was what I wanted: Craiglist, the internet, and items that came in brown wrapped packages…

He placed her gently back on the ground and she toddled her fuzzy butt off to the others. Out of all of them she was the most approachable and she had balls of brass. It was rather like the little yippy dog that took on a Rottie and won.

He shimmered into deer shape and bounced over the fence and was gone into the woods. At least he could’ve said “Good night.” I sat in my usual chair and watched the girls do chicken stuff until the mosquitoes were getting aggravating. The girls wended their ways back into the house and settled down for the night. I sat on the couch with the light on low, just listening to the cicadas buzz and the moths bashing against the screens. I thought I heard hooves on the street, but figured I was just playing tricks on myself. I finally went off to bed and fell deeply asleep.

Since Mr. Jim’s funeral I had been having dreams that were so odd, so strange, yet comforting in some way. Last night was no different. It looked like I was in a fairy court. Didn’t I mention I was a voracious reader too, since growing up and I could read what I wanted? I still try to read some of the new novels that come out. I loved mythology too. My Edith Hamilton’s are quite ragged and dog eared.

I was welcomed as a long lost friend. I was hugged and passed along like a potato until I was at the foot of the steps of a wooden dais. There was a King on the throne. His crown perched precariously between his huge rack of antlers. The Queen’s throne beside him was empty and he beckoned me forward. I only took a couple of steps when my ex stopped my progress by waving a gun in my face. The whole scene popped out of existence and I was standing at the entrance to the Park. I woke myself completely up.

That was the first time I had had THAT one and I was pissed off again that my ex intruded into even my dreams. Dammit!

Nano 2011~Chapter 3

2011-12-03T17:20:00.000-08:00

After all was said and done, Mr. Jim's family sold his house and other people started to move in…young families mostly with bratty spoiled kids.It seemed as if he had been the glue that held the neighbourhood all together. And I missed my friend way too much. I had only known him for a few short months and I felt as if I had lost a much beloved family member…

The new people were clueless, letting their dogs and kids run amok. I would wind up being the old bag who would yell at them to “Get off my lawn!” and pump the shotgun, or be the wicked witch in the haunted house. I didn’t care. I left notes on their cars and bags of poop on their doorsteps. I picked up after my birds, I didn’t see why others couldn’t pick up after their dogs. They’d park wherever the Hell they wanted even if it was right across from my driveway so *I* couldn’t get out if I had to. They’d have all night pool parties and I hated to leave the house in case one of them got out of hand, an ijit got into the yard, and hurt my girls. I actually busted one bonehead climbing over the fence, zapping his gonads in the process because he had lost their football in my yard. The Brahma ran right up with her hackles flared and pecked his ankle HARD…when she went to spur him, I grabbed her. Then I tossed the ball over. It had some beak marks in it. Oh well. Not my problem. I told him the hot wire was always on and next time come around to the front door and ask…he limped away, grumbling, and bleeding from the chicken's bite. All his buddies were laughing at his predicament.

When the cats tried chasing my girls or snatching birds off the feeders, out came the good old green garden hose on full jet. *I* was a good neighbour. The others weren’t. I got in touch with Animal Control and he told me I was in my rights to SSS: Shoot, Shovel, Shut Up…I asked if it was applicable to the owners…he snickered, but said that was the homicide dept and not his. Dang. At least he was on my side, and issued citations left and right to the idiots. One dog, a dopey dipstick of a Designer dog (they were Mutts when I grew up) called a Dalmatian Pointer that the owners bragged that they had paid a tonne of money for insisted on chasing cars: except for mine. I stopped suddenly and he ran into the back of it. I couldn’t help it if a figment chose that very second to hop off the sidewalk and cross the street in front of me, and I didn’t want to smoosh it. Now, don’t get me wrong: I LIKE animals, well trained, well taken care of, cherished pets. Once they’re running loose, they’re predators and I refused to back down. Once again, I called the dog officer. He came out and issued a citation for an unleashed dog. In front of the “owners” he asked if I wanted to file charges for damage to my car. Slobber was the only actual damage. The blockhead of a dog was fine. And I was now on the neighbour’s shit list. If they couldn’t control their animal, it wasn’t my fault. They KNEW he roamed the neighbourhood, chased the cars, treed cats, raccoons and foxes, and stole food off grills. And they didn’t do anything. But, at the very least, he stopped chasing MY car.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t do that with my ex. I would be in jail, like that lady in Florida who ran over her cheating hubby like he was a friggin' speed bump. They caught it all on tape too! He was still being an annoying pain in the ass. He left a message on my machine that he was looking to move into a house nearby and wanted to know if I knew of any that might be for sale. I didn’t answer and deleted the message. Like I wanted him anywhere near me?! Hell, even Pluto would’ve been too close. A one-way ticket to the International Space Station might’ve been in order.

He even started following me on my walks, when I started exercising again. The first couple of times, I was crying too hard to make it even half way, curling up on one of the scattered benches or finding a convenient log. At least I could pass off the runny nose and red eyes on allergies. That was my ME time and he was NOT going to muck it up! I called the cops on my cell, but they couldn’t do anything because it was a public park. Shit! Of course, being a fat tub of lard, he didn’t get too far. Every time I saw a different animal, or heard a new birdsong, I wanted to tell Mr. Jim. And he wasn’t there. But I did it anyways. Okay…so the other walkers thought I was nuttier than the proverbial single fruitcake passed 'round the world…

One morning, before it got really and truly hot and muggy, I went for my usual walk. I had my water bottle, my eclectic music selections ranging from System of a Down, Serj Tankian, and Scars on Broadway to The Who, Apocalyptica, Iron Maiden, Three Days Grace, Deep Purple, The Moody Blues…well, you get the picture; and my cell phone and digital camera. I was putting together a scrapbook of all the things I saw when I walked and I was going to self-publish it and dedicate it to Mr. Jim. I was on the bike path heading back to the car, when I saw it: a white tailed deer with a set of antlers that would make a hunter make a wet spot, standing quietly in the small space between the bike path and the Scout Nature Trail like it had been waiting for me…Wow!! It was the first one I had seen in the park…and it was a once-in-a-life-time picture. It let me snap more photos than I thought possible for a wild animal. Other walkers flowed around me without stopping as if I was a rock in a stream. How sad for them! They didn’t even SEE the beautiful animal. It let me get so close that I had to wonder if it hadn’t been someone’s pet and released into the wild…I reached my hand out to touch the velvety nose. It snorted and flapped it’s tail before bounding off…it hadn’t moved for any of the other people rushing by and I knew who it was…my stupid ex!!!

“Gods Dammit!” I yelled.

“It was only a dumb animal.” he panted. He had obviously been trying to follow me. Depending on what I wanted to do for the day, I could make the whole bike path anytime between and hour and a half to ¾ of an hour. I was doing the fast one, which I had stopped short when I saw the deer. I put the headphones back on and started my walking again. I was able to tune him out and leave him in my dust as I continued, but he had ruined the nice feeling I had had having such a close encounter with the woodland critter.

I went straight home, hugged all my girls, and took a shower to get rid of the ex germs. I still had trouble getting over the deer acting so tame…I wondered if they got rabies…I looked it up and found out that they didn’t usually, but I wasn’t terribly reassured.

I called my boss, then settled down to work, and things went along fine. I took my lunch break, letting the girls roam the yard. I rounded them back up, and started working again. 5 o’clock came, I called into work and told her I was done for the day. I made dinner for us. The girls put themselves to bed and then it was my turn.

I had just settled in with a good book and was all comfy in front of the fan, when the phone rang. I had caller ID, but this one was an unknown #. I answered it and I could barely understand what the caller was saying. The receiver sounded like it was being passed from person to person and they were learning English from a language that didn’t even have 12 letters, let alone 20+ and the syntax and grammar were screwy too. It was a very stilted conversation reminding me of the odd crowd at Mr. Jim's funeral and I had to have them repeat themselves too many times. Finally, I got a “goodbye.” Well, at least that’s what I thought it was. I hung up wondering what the Hell had just happened, looking at the phone like it had connected me with the Twilight Zone and I was waiting for Rod Serling's voice over. I looked at the clock and realized I had been helping the ESL class for almost an hour. I was even more tired than I should’ve been, hardly able to keep my eyelids open. I turned off the light and rolled over.

I tossed and turned, flipped and spun, instead of having a restful night's sleep. I kept dreaming of that strange group from the funeral and of creatures that could’ve come right from Greek, Egyptian, Assyrian, and other ancient mythologies that were part people/part animals…

I shook the cobwebs away when the alarm went off, actually wanting to pitch the clock radio straight out the window, like a Nolan Ryan fastball. I dressed, turned on the coffee, let the girls out, then ate breakfast. Cold cereal with milk for me and layer pellets for them, with no milk, because chickens are lactose intolerant.You don't wanna know what milk does to their systems cuz it ain't pretty, neither is cleaning feathery behinds which I learnt from experience.

I really didn’t feel like doing my walk yet, so I attempted working instead. I kept looking at the clock, and after a half hour of doing nothing but drumming my fingers on the keyboard, I gave up. I got the girls back inside and instead of driving to the park, I decided to take the hidden path. It was still warm, but not stew in your own juices hot yet, and it would warm my legs up a bit for the hills that came up later.

The path was only a few 100 yards long, but it was shady and cool. I was glad I had taken a sweatshirt. I could tie it around my waist when I started sweating as I kept walking. I was near where it came out into the bike path when a hand grabbed me and yanked me into a thicket in the Big Meadow. I struggled, but couldn’t get away, the person was way too strong. I was really scared, recalling that a while back some women had been mugged when they walked. But the body of the person holding me had an almost calming aura. We hunkered down as footsteps clomped by. I caught a whiff of the Old Spice Lime cologne that my ex used…he probably bathed in the stuff. He was cursing as he blundered by. Unfortunately the cologne made my allergies act up as usual. I tried valiantly to stifle the sneeze I felt coming, but I was unable to. Dammit! I was pushed farther into the thicket and into the care of another set of arms that could’ve lifted a semi…what the Hell?! I KNEW that I was awake. I pinched myself to be sure and it hurt. The original person that had pulled me into the bushes had now gone and in exact spot was a White Tailed Deer! I wondered what drugs my mother had done in the late 60's-early 70’s to cause me to be seeing such weird shit so many years later.

The deer sproinged out of the bushes and almost landed on top of my ex. I saw the gleam of a gun in his hand as he tried to avoid the collision. How the Hell did he get that? But then I figured that one of his skanks dujour knew someone who knew someone…What he was going to do with the gun was pretty obvious. Like I had said before, I had read enough Ann Rule books…Maybe the lazy scum sucker had taken out an insurance policy on me and was trying to collect! There was sposta be no guns, bow hunting, drinking, loose dogs, etc in the park, but people ignored half of those rules…

When the deer-man came back, after what seemed to be a day or so, but was really only like a half hour, he said that I could go now safely. Well, thanks for that I said. I glanced at the person behind me, and she blinked. I saw a third eyelid, like my girls had. Okay...so she was a bird in the off season…that would explain the strong arms reasonably well: she’d need them to fly around.

I was too tempted to head right off to the packy, then call the nearest loony bin to see if they had an opening in a nice, safe, padded room.

I walked home somehow, gathered my girls, and pulled the covers over my head. This was just too much for my mind to have to deal with…

When the phone started ringing, I just let it go to the machine…I wasn’t in the mood. I finally got out of bed when I heard my boss’ frantic voice on the tape. Shit!!! I dialed my work and she was almost out of her mind. How could I tell her what had happened? SHE’D put me in the nuthouse in a second! I just told her that I saw my ex and he had a gun and I was afraid he was going to use it, so I was hiding…true enough…I was hidden under mounds of feathers, sharp beaks, wicked talons and pointy spurs.

She suggested that I call the cops. I had thought about that, but didn’t want to stir the pot too much with my ex. Especially now I knew that he was armed…I think that finally scared me…I put my sandals back on, hugged and kissed each of the girls and went straight to the PD where I swore out a formal complaint against my ex for stalking and that he was packing…Because I had seen the gun in actuality, they could pick him up if he didn’t have a permit for it. I rather doubted that he did because that would’ve cost him money. Hell, I made it easy for them too…I gave them the address of my old apartment in town!

I went home again, made sure all the windows were locked and checked the cellar for lurkers. Thankfully there was nothing but spiders, house centipedes and boxes.

I redialed work, got my boss and let her know what was up. There would be patrols a couple of times a shift to make sure I was okay.

I did a little bit of work, but I kept making mistakes because my brain was back with the deer-man and the bird-woman. When the latest job was sent back for the third time, I called in and gave up for the day.

Nano 2011~Chapter 2

2011-12-01T17:33:00.000-08:00

He tried to reach for my hand to hold it, but I drew it back like his were armed mouse traps. I didn’t want him to touch me…EVER…again. He told me that he still loved me, and was actively looking for work. More lies. My sources said that he never left the apartment, not even for food. I didn’t even want to see what science projects were underway in the fridge. I was afraid they might attack. It took him over an HOUR to sign in 5 places! He was complaining too much. My back-up kept poking his head around the door. Well, I had promised him food after I was done.

I left the stick pen, the paper towels I sat on, and only took the plastic bag I had put the papers in. I didn’t want to contaminate the car with any microbes that I might’ve picked up. The first order of business was to feed my companion; after that, the lawyer, then the hazmat team would be called to take off my first two layers of epidermis.

It was a no contest divorce. He was getting every single thing that he put into the marriage, which was absolutely NOTHING!!! And that’s what I told the judge when we appeared before her. When my lawyer introduced my ledger into evidence, you could’ve heard a feather drop. I had to struggle to keep the smug grin off my face. He was screwed and even his public defender knew it. But to be fair, the judge ordered that he would get a month’s rent of the apartment and $1,000 for alimony for each year we were married. $10K and $1,200 rent were fine. I had it and could write out a check right there, if that would be okay? But could I have a receipt? Please?

The judge snickered, but turned it into a cough, pronounced us divorced and that it would be final in 90 days. I could’ve danced out of the court room on the ceiling. My mother decided it would behoove her to make an appearance…of course, the divorce was MY fault because I didn’t “support” my husband…if I never saw the old hag again I would be very happy. She sat her bony ass on HIS side of the courtroom: that told me everything I needed to know. She was bending his ear as I exited. I had never given HER money, except for the excessive rent she had me pay when I started working and before I moved out, and just sent 2-for-a-dollar bday/sMother’s day cards to her. As much as she had tried to make me into her milquetoast/wishy-washy/don’t make waves image growing up, it just made me more stubborn, obstinate, pigheaded, bullheaded, mulish…well, you get the picture. I would never ever BE her, NOR her little puppet any longer. I wasn’t a dumb teenager. I was 30+ years old! I knew what I was doing, where I was going, and what I wanted to do with my life.

The end!

Take it or leave it!

Don’t let the screen door hit you on the ass on the way out!

My way or the Highway!

I wrote out the "Good Frickin Riddance to Bad Rubbish" check,took the receipt and off I went on my merry little free from the sponge (no offense to sponges) way. Go me!

I had been renting a little studio apartment, and had my furniture in storage. Unfortunately, my ex got the idea that I was stalking material. He’d “hide” in his shit box of a car, which you could hear 5 miles before you saw the loud orange colour. It was his pride and joy…I STILL have no idea why. If I had ever seen him having sex with the tail pipe, it probably wouldn’t have surprised me in the least. He could be found lurking outside work, my apartment, or in the grocery store aisles. One time he even tried to follow me into a dressing room at my favourite department store! At which point I had him carted off by the local cops and slapped with a TRO. Then it was the incessant phone calls. And the letters, sometimes 2 or 3 at a time, proclaiming undying love. There was no way that he could love anyone if he didn't get the hint that I didn't wanna have anything more to do with him, the dumb-ass. I put a trap and trace on the phone, and opened the letters with white gloves and put them in Ziploc bags in a box. Security at work was informed not to let him in, and my boss was very good at staggering my hours, and having someone escort me to the garage when I left.

I finally sat down with my boss, and asked for a leave of absence. Having that dipstick following me all over was too much of a distraction, and it wasn’t really making the firm look good to have it’s name in the police blotters every other week. It was sadly given, with lotsa hugs and good lucks tossed my way by my fellow cube rats. I cleared out my closet of an office. I was waylaid by my boss who said that I could continue to work from home and would lend me a neato laptop to use. I’m amazed my eyeballs didn’t fall out and roll around on the floor…The only stipulation was that I would just have to check in at least once a day so that she would know I was okay.

Security helped my out to the car with my stuff, and there was the asshat…figured. I waved sweetly, then flipped him off. When he saw me with the muscle, he took off. I made my way back to the apartment. My ex was parked outside almost as soon as I got there. It was deffo time to relocate. I took another picture of him and Moby Orange…I had stacks. LeSigh…

I set up the laptop and since my place came with wifi, I started to look for houses, farther away from the city. There were a few I had to look up. If I didn’t know the names they were either out in West Bumblefuck or South Jesus.

I found a likely looking bedroom community that sounded interesting. It was sorta halfway between two of the big cities. That was doable. There were buses, commuter rail, and easy access to the major roads, so I didn’t have to drive into town if I didn’t want to rack up the miles on Ye Olde Tempo.

Just to keep said AssHat on his toes, I continued to act as if I was going to work. I’d run a yellow light, and he’d be stuck at the red…hehe Yeah, very juvenile of me, but it was fun.

The packing was pretty easy because there wasn’t much that I hadn’t put in storage. I had a desk, my bed, some towels, dishes, rudimentary items like that.

I put a bid in on a place which was on a dead end street off a side street off another side street. I had my trusty stack of internet directions to help me find it. It was a lovely little bungalow at the end of the street where it stopped abruptly at some woods. It needed some paint on the trim, but it would be all mine from the uneven back yard to the original piebald front door.

One of my new neighbours introduced himself, bringing over a jar of honey from his hives…mmm. He was also a pissah gardener. I had free rein to visit and we got to be very good friends. He was like the neighourhood watch all by himself. He knew who belonged, and who didn’t. And it was a good thing too…that sonuvabitch ex found me again! He put a tracker somewhere on the car…grr. But I found it and tossed it in the trash.

He parked in front of the house…I ignored him.

He knocked on the door…I ignored him.

He tried getting in…I called the cops.

I was really getting sick of it all and it was causing all sorts of health problems for me. Especially the day that it felt like a volcano went off in my head, and I was flopping around the floor like a landed fish. I was hoping that I would be found before my liver was eaten and my eyeballs were gobbled like grapes by the chickens. I called Mr. Jim. He called an ambulance for me and would look after the girls.

Well, after a lovely weekend spent in two different hospitals, numerous tests, enough blood taken to keep Elizabeth Bathory swimming lapd, and some amazingly wonderful chow, if you could believe it, I was diagnosed with a fucked up heart beat…how lovely…and I had never had any signs up until now…they stuffed a pacemaker/defibrillator in for shits and giggles. Wasn’t that nice? I would be stuck at home for 4-6 weeks, unable to drive or do much else physically…The only redeeming part of that was that I wasn’t harassed by my ex for a whole weekend. Woohoo!!

All the neighbours brought food, did some shopping, and laundry for me…It was wonderful! Except for the circumstances, I coulda been the Queen of Sheba. After a follow up exam, I was cleared to drive, and informed that I needed to build my strength back up and to lose some weight. That's where I started this story. I asked if I could just mail it somewhere with no forwarding address. Have I mentioned that doctors have no sense of humour? Running was thought of, but quickly cast aside…I don’t run ANYWHERE! Unless maybe there’s a big bear behind me, or a very cute guy in front of me. Walking was suggested as an alternative. I didn’t wanna cruise the mall at the butt crack of dawn with all the old folks. Traipsing along the main drag would get you squished like an indecisive squirrel. So I asked Mr. Jim where he walked, since I knew he did it most every day. He took me to the absolute end of our street, and showed me…Oh my Gods!! It was amazing…there was a little dirt path that went by a big meadow and there were nature paths and a 2 and a half mile bike path, which you could walk on too, if you were careful that the pedal pushers didn‘t mow you down…Wow…I didn’t even know it was there!!! It was nestled in between my new town and a neighbouring one and taken care of by both. I hugged and kissed Mr. Jim for showing me. Even though I HAD to friggin’ do it, I KNEW that I was going to like wandering there, and seeing what critters might be lurking in the “wilderness“. I wanted to figure out what lived in the area. City people nevah think of this shit. I hadn’t, so I asked Mr. Jim. He said that depending on when I went, what time of day, how many idiots let their dogs loose, and the time of year, what I might see. I headed off to the bookstore for a field guide so I could keep track. He also mysteriously added that there might be other things that wouldn’t be found in any guidebook. Bullshit! I thought, he was just trying to fake me out…Silly me…I shoulda known better. He grew up in the area. He KNEW!

I went and bought nice top-of-the-line sneakers, special excercise clothes, a pedometer, the whole deal, but the first time I tried to walk, I thought I would die three steps in…I only did 5 minutes before I wanted to call an ambulance. Mr. Jim laughed and left me gasping and panting on a bench while he continued. Almost an hour later, I was okay to go and we walked back to the house. He said that I’d do better every time. He was right there.

We walked the bike path every morning, and sometimes at night too as long as it was cool and light enough out. I enjoyed walking with him. He would point out some of the trees as we went along. I knew a maple from an oak, and that was about it from this city slicker. As we spent more time together, I could tell the various maples apart and could find sassafras, sycamore, and hemlock too. All the types of sparrows were a pain though…quick and small and didn’t oblige me by standing still long enough to me to let me look them up. There was a main entrance to the park from both towns. One side you could drive right to the big lake in the middle. We did that one time. Mr. Jim showed me where the snapping turtle hung out and not to aggravate him unless you wanted to be minus a few phalanges. Umm, no thanks…I wouldn’t wanna swim anywhere near him either. We actually saw him in totality one day, basking on one of the docks. If you had told me he had been around since the Cretaceous, I woulda believed you. He was the size of a dining room table!! Even his little brethren resembled Gamera of Japanese horror film notoriety.

I settled into a nice routine. Wake up, have coffee, and get dressed. Feed the girls. Walk with Mr.Jim. Tele-communicate with work starting about 9. Break for lunch around noon. Finish up around 5. Feed the girls again and myself and Mr. Jim three times a week. He'd bring nice veggies from his garden for me and the birds. It was actually a pretty nice/good life…except for asshat's continuing presence. I got a license to carry…pepper spray and mace. I didn't think I'd be coordinated enough to use an actual firearm, not even a peashooter.

By the start of the summer I could actually keep up with Mr. Jim. It was great to have someone to walk with. The doctor and nutritionist were happy with me, too. I lost a couple of sizes and about 20 pounds. I still had more weight to go, but I was doing alright and felt better. And I had something else to look forward too: seeing all the neat woodland creatures in their natural habitats.

Midsummer, we’d still walk, but Mr. Jim seemed like he was slowing down. I tried pressing him on his health. He slammed shut like an unhappy quahog. He was a pipe smoker, but it had never seemed to have been an issue before. One day in early August, I knocked on his door because he hadn't come over for our breakfast together. He didn’t answer and I couldn't see inside because the drapes were still drawn. We had keys to each other’s houses so I let myself in. Unfortunately, he was gone. He had died peacefully in his sleep. I broke down and cried. Then I called 911, even though there was no use. Looking and feeling like a marble statue usually equals deadles. Answering all the police questions was horrible. I felt like *I* had done something wrong, but I had only touched him to feel for a pulse in his wrist and his neck. Our neighbours came out to see what was going on. I noticed a Crow sitting in a tree nearby and a Blue Jay on the same branch...that was rather odd, I thought. They didn't usually get along. There was also a pair of Red Tailed Hawks soaring over the house calling, as the body of my dear friend was wheeled out on a gurney wearing a body bag.

His family now came out of the woodwork like flies over a nice, fresh, steaming pile of shit. As soon as the police heard that it was a natural death from the Medical Examiner and cleared the scene, they went through the house like Grant through Richmond…They had a yard sale before he was even buried! I was appalled, but I had no right to say anything: I wasn‘t a part of the family, just a close friend of Mr. Jim‘s. Even the other neighbours were aghast. They had seen Mr. Jim’s family only on Christmas, Easter, and Thanksgiving for the 30 odd years that he had lived there. The things his family considered junk were precious to me, and on Tuesdays before the trash men came, I would go dumpster diving. I got a vintage piano stool, some bird houses, and braided rugs to remember him physically. All of us were begrudgingly invited to the wake, the funeral, and the collation afterwards. I think we would've crashed anyways. His three kids did rather generic eulogies at the church that would’ve been better suited to a stranger on a bus than their own father. There was lots of tsk’ing and headshaking from the neighbourhood contingent.

Before the end of the funeral the priest asked if anyone else had anything to share. I got up to speak. I hadn't been intending to, but I felt that I HAD to, to remind his family of the wonderful man and dear friend, we had lost. My knees were clacking together, but I looked at his empty shell just lying there in his casket, and knew that it was right for me to speak, that he wouldn't have had it any other way. I had NO idea what I was going to say, but I know that every word was truly from my heart. I told about the changes he had helped make in my life from the jar of honey when I first moved into the neighbourhood from the city, generously giving his neighbours veggies from his own bountiful gardens, supporting my ill-fated attempts are gardening, up to our walks in the park and identifying the animals we saw as we went along.

When I finally looked up from the podium, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house, even from the family. Casting my gaze around, there was a flock of strangely dressed mourners in the shadows at the very back of the church. They must've come in while I was talking. They all had on reflector shades like from the 80’s so you couldn‘t see their eyes behind the lenses, floppy hats that covered most of their faces, long trench coats or capes, and a couple even had gloves on even with the humidity and warmth of the summer day.

The neighbours all came up to me and expressed their condolences for MY loss: I seemed to be the only person completely broken up about Mr. Jim’s passing. I thought I’d run out of tears. There was a couple of perfunctory nods to the actual family, who had ignored me, even at the wake the previous night. The group at the back waited until the very end to approach: they didn‘t even flick an eyeball towards his survivors, but came straight to me. The spokesman for the group reached out his hand and told me that he was “Sorry the most for the losings of such a wonderful, caring, natural person…and a void remains that must be refilled.” “Natural person?” WTF was that? I smelled wood and mulch and leaves with a twist of petshop…weird as Hell cologne. He backed away with a nod, and the whole pack left as one. I didn't know that things were going to get interesting around my home from that point on…

I made it through the graveside service, and the evil glares during the luncheon back at the church facility. Mr. Jim had wanted to be cremated, and sprinkled over his beloved park, but his family buried him in a plot that was nowhere near where any of them lived, and that wasn’t right either. I don’t know if they thought someone was gonna visit him or dig him up or what. Maybe it was going to be out of sight out of mind. I could only HOPE that he would haunt the whole bloody lot of them.

His family ripped out all his vegetable beds and threw away his compost. I snagged everything I could get my hands on and I KNOW I wasn’t the only one who crossed the street with buckets or wheelbarrows. The mature vegetables I gave away as much as I could to the food pantry, then to the neighbours and I kept a few for myself and the girls. There were tomatoes, peppers, cukes, zucchini, summer squash…too much for any one person and 4 hens to eat and I found myself wondering why.

Nano 2011

2011-11-18T13:13:00.000-08:00

This is what my Nano for 2011 is about:

"Elizabeth Dorset is an happily divorced woman. She hates her job, but loves her new house complete with pet chickens, and a neighbour that knows the score. Her ex husband is stalking her; she can't stand her only relative, and she finds an unlikely friend in an unlikely place. And finds that sometimes love really is in your own backyard."

This is the homepage for Pond Meadow Park. http://www.pondmeadowpark.org/ Any little bit goes towards it's upkeep and if and when I get this book published, I will more than gratefully give some of the proceeds to PMP for keeping it going.

This is the trail map:

http://www.pondmeadowpark.org/assets/downloads/pond_meadow_park_map083007.pdf

I've changed the names and such to protect the innocent. ;)

So here goes, this is the first chapter of Backyard Fae (working title):

Like I was gonna do what my doctor said…so what if he’s sposta be an expert?!! What the HELL did he know about my life?! What was the worst that could happen? I dropped dead. Noone woulda missed me! ARGH!!!

Let’s go back a little bit here…I had a boring, mindless job. I am, okay, WAS, an accountant working at one of the big city firms. I got to handle thousands, millions of dollars each year; None of it my own, and it was all just on paper…pfft. That was the worst part, but not really…it was just tedious and boring as Hell. I didn’t have much of a life…an ex I couldn’t stand and I have no idea why I married him in the first place, except to get a pushy, needy mother the Hell off my back.

Hell, he wasn’t that good in bed: I wasn‘t either…he got his and left me alone on the couch. Guess it all goes back to the good girls won’t put out shit my mother indoctrinated me with growing up…that’s why I have my abhorrent Accounting Degree when I really wanted to hang out with Zahi Hawass or Howard Carter or Hiram Bingham or Heinrich Schliemann…well, you get the idea. I was NEVAH the girlie girl. Hated pink, hated ruffles, hated bows, ick…give me ripped blue jeans and a tie dyed or rock band tshirt and jesus sandals and I’m as happy as a pig in shit!

But I was told constantly that digging for dead dusty old shit wasn’t for girls…and to get a degree that I could actually use. That’s why I’m a disgruntled, disaffected, disheartened, disappointed accountant.

But at least I have my own little pied-a-tierre. It’s a little 3 bedroom Cape. I was able to sock money away for a mortgage and it was all paid off before a year was up. You'd think that I would be one, but I’m not a cat lady…I’m a chicken lady instead. The house came with a half an acre in the ‘burbs that’s all nice and fenced in. I added an electrical fence so that the varmints and the stupid neighbours’ dogs don’t help themselves to a free dinner.

I cook for me and my girls. It sucks to cook for only one…they seem quite happy. They have their own dishes with their names on ‘em. It’s not like I’m knee deep in birds though…I have a manageable flock of 4, used to be 5, mutt/barnyard mixes. No roosters/cockerels/crowing hens…some asshat complained that my little Leghorn cockerel, Rick Burleson, was making her migraines (ahem…hangovers) worse. So I left my hand raised baby boy, with a loaf of Portuguese Sweet Bread with raisins, thanks, at a petting zoo. NO! I didn’t ditch him! I asked if they would like him first and let them meet each other first. And I cried for WEEKS!

So I have a little buff Cochin/Silkie bantam, a Dark Brahma, another dippy Leghorn and an Easter Egger. And we all get along fine, until the C/S goes broody and all hell breaks loose. She becomes a flat screaming pancake and steals everyone else’s eggs to sit on…but with no rooster around, no chicks…and she goes broody every other friggin’ week…but that’s okay. The wonderful fresh, straight out of the chicken’s butt eggs make it all worthwhile…Won’t eat these birds, though. It would be like eating one of your kids…if I HAD kids, I guess. There’s nothing meaty about a Leghorn and her head is just as hollow. Wouldn’t eat the S/C mix cuz her bones, skin and meat is black…ick…they’re a delicacy in China, but no thanks. The Brahma makes an oven stuffer roaster look sickly and the E/E is good sized too.

Enough about my flock, let’s get back to me, lol…the expert/doctor/sawbones/butcher said I need to lose weight. Well, Hell! ROUND has always been a shape, hasn’t it? He says that my body mass index is 37...I told him couldn’t I wait ‘til 40 then sell? He didn’t get the joke. Sigh. Well, I AM only 5’2” and according to the height/weight charts I SHOULD be 6’7”. Bummer. I had been getting out of breath, not from smoking, thanks. NOT one of my bad habits. Jelly beans, Doritos, Yeah, definitely.Throw in meatball subs and DQ …need I say more?

So the quack tells me that I need to watch what I eat and see a dietician/nutritionist. Well fuckaduck. I watch what I eat…its spins around and around in the microwave…Insult to injury. The nutritionist looks like she needs to go to Cambodia or Somalia for a decent meal…I could play a tune on her ribs, ferchrissakes. So she has me doing a food diary…ack! I hafta write down everything I put in my mouth and how it makes me feel…hmm, let’s see annoyed that I hafta do this shit in the first place…carrot sticks will NEVER EVER replace cheese worms. If it’s whole grain, ya might as well eat the friggin box, they taste the same. At least I like veggies, and it was the winter heading into spring so I could scrounge plenty of those from the local farmers’ markets. Can’t grow anything but bread mould myself. Believe me I’ve tried everything from talking to the plants, cursing them out and crying…none of it worked. I’ve even killed an air plant, but then again, I had help because I think my ex peed in it or worse.

Speaking of socking money away, I had also saved some from doing all sorts of work in the summers growing up: cutting lawns, painting fences, planting someone else’s flowers. Never baby sat…never wanted to, couldn‘t stand the things. I even did a telephone switchboard, and a convenience store. I DID splurge every now and again, but I had a tendency to over-think what I bought and I’d return most everything. Yeah, I know I hated me too. And the store clerks cringed when they saw me coming…

Which brings me to my ex and what HE’s been up to. Which is basically not a damned thing! I busted my ass to put him through college. He “wanted to be an architect“, but he was really a professional student. He didn’t WANT to work. He enjoyed being the big man on campus. He had plenty of job offers; the school even set them up! He was just too lazy to get off his ass and do anything about them. Well, I had finally had enough. I was working 7 days a week. 40+ at the accounting firm, then I’d deliver subs, pizzas and other grub to all the munchie maniacs on Friday and Saturday nights. Sundays, I got to sleep in until a whopping 7:30 AM, then I delivered the Sunday local communist rag. Woohoo! After 10 years of that shit, I finally kicked him out. He had never been on ANY of my accounts, thankfully. I had read enough Ann Rule books and had SOME common sense. Then he had the absolute GALL to ask ME for alimony! I showed up to court with a ledger with every thin dime that he had sponged off me through the years and all of his excuses for not working. I let him have the shitty little condo that I had never liked, but I hadn’t want to spend anything on either, and was now just a roach motel, in fact I think the roaches didn‘t even wanna live with him. Actually, I stepped over a couple that were ratting him out to PETA about the conditions... He wouldn’t even move to clean the toilet, or the sink, or do dishes, or laundry, or just about anything else while I was out working my fingers to the bone. The last straw was when I heard him talking on the phone and he hung up when I poked my head into the single bedroom. No, I didn’t get to sleep there, which was fine by me. He was stupid enough to think that I’d believe that he was talking to a potential employer at 1 AM…Yeah Right…I didn’t just fall off the back of the turnip truck.

The next day I asked for a few hours off to tend to some personal business. Since I never took any time, I had more than enough prolly to walk around the world. And my boss knew that hubby was a jerk.

I came home early and found him in bed with some floozy that he had met on-line…the kind of people most found at a bowling alley, according to Sir John Gielgud in the original movie, "Arthur". He apologized up and down the line, but I took all my things, including the toilet paper, and rented a decent hotel room. I was kind enough to leave him a knife, fork, spoon, and a cereal bowl and a semi melted microwave dish that was about as flat as a corduroy road.

I went right to a lawyer whose business card I had taken when he was in for an audit…I had the divorce papers in the mail the very next day. Delivery Confirmation, Priority Overnight, Signature Needed. No way he was going to tell me that he never got them. I called him every day when I woke up, when I took a coffee break, at lunch, when I left at the end of the day, and when I got home, to have him send them back. I finally said "fuck it!", took another day off, and went to the apartment. I would have to burn my clothes and shoes, and be decontaminated by a hazmat team from the Atomic Energy Commission when I left.

There were Coney Island Whitefish schooling everywhere, cigarette butts on the tables, and it smelled like either a meth lab or there were tigers peeing on the rugs. I hadn’t even been gone two months yet! I “Cop Knocked” on the bedroom door to announce my presence. I really didn’t want to see the flavour of the month …of the day, or of the minute. He actually came out of the room. I brought a copy of the divorce papers for him to sign. I even brought a friend of my boss’ who worked in the Sheriff’s department for back up, or muscle, as the case might be. I had plenty of people that would help me out, if I asked.

He came out to the kitchen table, scratching his balls all the way…I figured he had crabs, ticks, fleas, or lice, or something worse that might cause gangrene and didn’t want to get too close. I took the papers out of a plastic bag, put down some paper towels I had brought with me for the occasion, and sat. I indicated where he was supposed to sign. He blinked at the light coming in through the open door, then at the papers. All the places he needed to sign were highlighted and had tape flags too, along with X’s next to the lines. I had to make it easy for the Neanderthal…no offense to actual Neanderthal people.

I handed him a stick pen I liberated from work. I used fountain pens because I loved how they wrote…And then the whining started. “How was he going to live? He had no money. He had no job. He was sick and couldn’t take care of himself“…I couldn’t help it if his sickness was laziness and it was terminal…I was amazed that he never hired anyone to breathe for him, or to hold his penis when he urinated, or to wipe his ass after he shit. Once again I had to ask myself what the Hell I had ever seen in him in the first place.

I could’ve lived happily, healthily, and richly as a spinster. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. My mother (here we go again) introduced us. He went to her church. I could’ve cared less about that stuff. I think he went only to hit up old ladies for money with his cons…oops, sob stories. My mother said he was nice, polite and clean…requisites for her. I drooled over the biker types, but would never have approached one without a whip and a chair and a flea collar. Brain power was the most sexy to me anyways. He really WAS nice, and polite, and he never did anything to get dirty. He was just a “vanilla” person if that makes any sense. He wasn’t for me. My mother was head over heels in love with him and wanted him in the family at all costs. I KNEW that she had given him money to take me out the first time, and he asked her every time after that. I should’ve known, but didn’t find out until much later. He pressured me to marry him after a month, saying that we were soul mates. I KNEW that was bullshit, there was NO SUCH THING, but HE was pressuring me, my mother was pressuring me…and I buckled like a tectonic plate. My mother wanted the white gown, veil deal. Jeans and a tee were what I wanted. I was out-voted. We got married in HER church with all HER friends buzzing around like flies around shit. She was the star of the show and I let her do it. I didn’t invite any of my fellow employees: I was there under protest myself.

It didn’t take too long to realize that all of his “virtues” were really shortcomings. He was nice cuz he was a bullshit artist. Polite for the same reason. Clean cuz he never friggin' worked! He’d talk a good game about all these plans that were just waiting to come up…yeah right. You could only keep me in the dark and feed me shit for so long before I remembered that I wasn’t a mushroom…

Nano 2011

2011-11-16T13:21:00.000-08:00

I sorta started a bit ahead. Not really cheating, but not in line with all the rules. I only did because I KNEW that I was going to be a mess after the surgery, which is another post for another day...

This story I based on my walks in Pond Meadow Park and my friend, Mr. Joe, and the critters I'd see and what might happen if there was an entrance to the Land of the Fae there.

I LOVE urban fantasy, especially Charles DeLint and Jim Butcher.

I've read almost ALL of Charles DeLint's older stories except for the Fair at Emain Macha and the Riddle of the Wren, but I'll find em somehow and be able to enjoy them.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_de_Lint

He's a very prolific writer as you can see.

Jim Butcher, only two words apply here, Harry Dresden...My SIL got me interested in him and Sookie Stackhouse. DS even did his Halloween costume as Harry Dresden, and it was AWESOME!!! He did a really pissah job on it.
Notice the resemblence? http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6219313-storm-front

He even made his own staff and shield bracelet:

He was trying for a good mix between TV Harry and Book Harry and did it almost all by himself. He asked for advice a couple of times and I was able to do it. Don't tell him, but I'm proud of the work he put into it and how it came out.

Now, where was I? I can only blame that informative tangent on the Oxy's...hehe.

I really LOVE walking Pond Meadow. I'd see all sortsa birdies, chipmunks all over, squirrels,both grey and red (which I didn't even know that we had)

I've even seen a Green Heron once and flushed a regular one from it's nest...Talk about a pterodactyl looking beastie with that wingspan...Yikes. And I can't forget to mention the battery sucking Great Blue Heron...it didn't matter if I had just put batteries in the camera, as soon as I tried to snap a picture of the SOB, the batteries were dead...

We also have Swans, Canada Geese, Mallard Ducks, Snapping Turtles (I think the one that almost got DS is gone by now; he was old and huge THEN) Eastern Painted Turtles, and Red Eared Sliders. I've also seen Ribbon/Garter snakes, and there's some sorta fish in the actual pond, prolly like carp or some such.

I'll hafta write more tomorrow...I hurt too much right now...

Oh what fun this year has been too...

2011-09-18T15:57:00.000-07:00

Gods, it's been a while...pfft.

To say the very least the last two years have been a long strange trip... injury, pain, mayhem, all inclusive to say the very least.

I went back to work in March after the operation on my shoulder and the one to slap my pacemaker in...I have a lovely new scar.

Ain't it just loverly? And every 5-7 years they open it up to change the batteries...groovy eh? It doesn't take as long to do it as the first time, supposedly. That's what I've heard anyways...

I've also convinced myself to do the valve operation that I need to do...I'm not happy about it,but it needs to be done...

I've seen the Bach Doctor a couple of times, and Sasha too. I've been emailing Dr. Sasha a few times...

Michael J. Landzberg, MD

Michael Landzberg, MD, is board certified in Internal Medicine and Adult Cardiology, and is the founder and director of the Boston Adult Congenital Heart (BACH) and Pulmonary Hypertension Service. His areas of particular clinical and research expertise include novel catheter-based diagnostic and therapeutic techniques, pulmonary hypertensive disorders, and coronary arterial issues in congenital heart disease. He’s recognized as a leader in the care of adults with congenital heart disease and sits on national and international task forces and committees.

Doctor Sasha is camera shy...silly boy.

Way back in June I had a cardiac stress test, like the past two years haven't been one? sheesh.

I guess it went okay.

In July my sister and I went to the Manning Bowl in Lynn for DCI. Drum Corps International. We had a great time. I even bought a Cavaliers t. There'll be a post on that coming up.

My thyroid's still fucked up...pfft...whatevah

Later on in July I had a cardiac echo. Yays for non invasive tests! I just hadta lay there and try not to squirm when the tech was jabbing the thingee into my rib cartilage. I felt bruised all ovah.

On that same day, I also got to go sit in a little teeny clear telephone booth...I'm claustrophobic. This wonderful test was to test my lung functions. Groovy.

In August was my pacemaker appointment. That's doing well. At least something is...

Since I've been back to work, I've been working a bajillionty hours too...when I first came back, it was all I could do to just crawl up the stairs when I got home.

On a better, sorta note, I've been actually losing weight. In February I was 201, in April 199, in August 193.6 and when I just had another test it was 192. There's something to be said for running around like Mike the Headless Chicken at work...

On August 22 I had my 7th and 8th Cardiac Catheterizations...ugh. Dr. Landzberg actually did it! Wow...I couldn't believe that. He's very pleased that I'm doing it...me, not so friggin' much. AND they only give you enough anesthetic to make you loopy, not enough to put you out...it's called "twilight sleep" and I fucking HATE it! When you're little and you wake up in the middle of an operation, you don't forget it. That is WHY I don't like "twilight sleep".

They don't sew you shut anymore, they use pressure instead. The guy who they used was very good. Unfortunately I had my period again...ugh. Must be being in the hospital. Pfft. Certainly didn't help having blood thinners injected. Oh yeah. I also had radio opague dye injected. It felt like I was swallowing the sun...very odd sensation...

The good news on THAT front was that ALL of my cardiac veins and arteries were clean and clear...unfortunately, my pulmonary artery is a fucking mess. It has stenosis (a sorta traffic jam) and a bend and one of my arm vein shunts has little feeders which are gonna make the heart valve replacement shit even more of a goat fuck cuz they're gonna hafta tie em all off.

You see the pulmonary valve...that's the one that needs to be replaced. It only has 2 flaps instead of 3. The Ventricular defect was fixed with a patch twice. My right ventricle is hypertrophic...sorta like this poor guy.

Sorta overgrows itself because it has to work twice as hard.

The aorta had to be fixed with an arm vein...I'm still wondering how the Hell they were able to just snag one...still haven't figured it out.

Ooops got off on a tangent there...so sorry.

I got to have another test WooHoo! NOT!!!

This one was a VQ Scan. This was to see how the blood flow to the lungs were. It turned out NOT good. The right one is at 3/4ths and the left one is a 23% so between the two I have 100% blood flow...That was what Sasha wrote me about. Now they need to find if the surgeon wants to do ANOTHER cath to put a stent in the Pulmonary Valve BEFORE the replacement or just do it during.

I got the directions for the VQ Scan but I didn't think about WHERE it actually was. I did okay until I saw Avenue Louis Pasteur. Shit shit shit! I felt fear all the way into my genetic material. All I had to do was see the sign and the building across the street and I wanted to run for the fucking hills. We parked and did all that. Went to information and got the way we were sposta go...unfortunately it was in the building that I remembered being in, the Fagen. Now, it's been 40 fucking YEARS since I've been there and I know it's changed some, but there's no way in HELL that you can tell a grown up that had shit done to them when they were young that they still don't feel that fear that most closely resembles the primeval fear of the dark and things that go bump in the night. It's the bowel loosening, involuntary peeing oneself type of fear. We, of course, were way too early. I just broke down...I was shaking and crying...

PTSD was raising it's ugly head. Dammit!

At least the surgeon that Sasha said is going to do my surgery knows his stuff.

Sitaram Emani

He's even done a heart transplant on a young girl. And other surgeries on little itty bitty babies.

I will get to meet him on the 18th of October when I go in for the pre-op tests...On the 19th I have the surgery. I get to spend 5-7 days in the hospital...I'm gonna miss my house.

That's the news so far...pfft.

Back again...

2011-01-16T11:22:00.000-08:00

Well my year wound up getting more interesting...

I went in for the surgery on my shoulder in October. Oh what fun...I had done Personal Torture and that helped a little but nowhere near enough.

I had some bone spurs that needed to be sanded down/planed off. Just a lovely as it sounds, put that helped a ton just to start. The next thing they found was that the labrum was torn...but the rotator cuff was fine. Thank the Gods, cuz that woulda be 4-6 months of healing...

Looks like their using swords and chopsticks doesn't it? I had three holes in the front of the shoulder and one in the back...
It's DAY surgery too! I was sent home wrapped up like a mummy with an electric ice chest, horsepills of ibuprofen and oxy's. Don't remember much of the first couple of days...wonder why?
I also had a catheter that was pumping pain meds right into the joint...arm? what arm? The REAL fun came when Ernie had to pull it out...I figured a couple of inches...God Damned Thing felt like it was a mile long! I almost blacked out from the pain, which is saying alot for me. It was like a foot long in actuality. Wished I had kept it...noone would believe it...

So I have my arm in a sling for a couple of days, living on Oxy's and Ibuprofen with my little ice chest. AND I'm sleeping in Orange Chair, which is an Orange Velvet-ish LazyBoy recliner...You can't sleep on your back or anything else, but being in the Orange Chair was a great help. Ernie was doing all the cooking.

A couple of weeks in, I can use my arm a tiny bit, but still sleep with the sling on. It's quite an adventure to do stuff with your other hand, but I did okay.

It's a weekend and I'm hearing some scurrying sounds...hmm. What could it be? I see a little grey critter run out from behind the fish tank. It's not a mouse or a rat...It's a vole...too cute. BUT if Ernie sees him, all Hell's gonna break loose. So I watch to see where it goes. Under the fish tank, under Orange chair and into the dining room and back...okay. I can do this! I grab the fish net and I scoop up the little mofo. I have him in the net and have his tail. Ernie's like what the hell are you doing?
Umm Catching a vole? Can you open the door so I can toss him out?
Out he goes to do vole stuff.

Next night I hear screaming about a mouse being in Mike's room. Mike's the biggest fucking sissy EVAH!!! Dear Gods, you'd think that he's being raped by Freddie Kreuger...So I grab the fish net again. I'm going up the stairs, vole's trying to get down the stairs. Scoop and tail and out he goes... jeeze...
Isn't he cute? Vicious looking isn't he? pfft.

So now it's time for me to do the Post Op Personal Torture. I have a date all nice and set up. The night before which is a Wed, I wasn't feeling to spiffy. I felt like my head was a volcano that was going to erupt. It was a wierd sensation...My heart would start thumping and then the volcano thing. And I was just sitting...so I went to bed in Orange Chair early...

Next morning, I feel okay...sitting at the puter trying to work on my 2010 NaNo. I figured I should just change my PT appointment and called the office.

That was a good thing too...because more fun was on the way.

I stood up, I think, to get another cup of coffee or do something...next thing I know I'm on the floor flopping around like a Magikarp.

My head is smashing against the table. Very glad I didn't break it. The table, not my head...
I can't get up! I can't move except for Flail Attack. What the Hell am I gonna do?! As far as I know Obelisk can't dial the phone, neither can Boogie or the fish...
Everything's going black...Oh fuck Oh shit what can I do? I'm still trying to get up...it ain't gonna happen.
Next thing I know, some guy is yelling in my ear "Get Up Stupid!" I still can't but the next thing I remember I'm back in my chair. Remember there's only me and the critters...there's no one else in the house and I don't recognize the voice.

I immediately call Ernie at work and tell him to get his ass the hell home like Yesterday!!!

He gets home about an hour later...I'm in Orange Chair, scared shitless...I got Obelisk back on the porch. Poor bird was all freaked out...prolly pissed that she didn't get to eat my eyeballs.

He carts me over to South Shore...I sit in a wheelchair and wait for him to park...Then we go in. I don't remember tons of stuff, like why the hell I'm there...my meds, how to spell my last name...I start to go down again...I get shoved into a wheel chair. Ernie's booking me in...the check in nurse was a holier than thou born again Cunt! Sorry but she WAS...She asked religion, not that I haven't been there before and I'm prolly one of the only of my ilk that darken their doors. Ernie answered, Witch or Wiccan or Pagan. Like a good doobie...She looks at him and says, "Well, maybe THAT's her problem."
What a fucking unprofessional thing to say! Glad I didn't hear this til later or I woulda ripped her a new asshole.

I get ECG'd and O2 and 2 IV's. They couldn't get one in the left so a Scituate paramedic did it. But they were able to get one in the right. At least it takes a shorter time for me to head off to Brigham and Womens...pfft. It's now like 2 in the after. Mike's gonna be home from school soon. So Ernie has to go. We'll meet up at B&W.

I have IV's and pads and all the other shit...jeeze. At least my O2's fine so I don't have to deal with that too...More ECG's...but no more of the volcano things...thank the Gods.

I don't remember most of the day to tellya the truth...About 5 Ernie and Mike come back, but I ain't there. I've been sent to the bowels of the place because I'm gonna have a pacemaker put in...but not JUST a pacemaker, a defibrillator pacemaker...It's about the size of my cellphone...Gods know I DID sign the paper...I remember listening to them all talking about it.

And they had to shave me again, just in case they needed to do an ablation/cath while they were there...

Unfortunately, my heart was in the right place, which in this case is the left side...where I just had surgery on my FRIGGIN SHOULDER!!! Just fucking ducky!!

Talk about Wham Bam Thank You Ma'am! I was duly processed, transported, and implanted within just a few hours...

I was back in Shapiro with the good eats and hotel room...different side this time. The next day I was gotten up and shuffled down the hall. I did okay...friggin sore though. Had a humungous bandage and IV's, but I could at least pee in the bathroom.

Landzberg the Bach doctor came by and talked to me about the valve replacement again...ick.
A bunch of interns and n00bs too...I feel like the last of my kind...

But at least everything's working okay, thank the Gods. And whomever got me back off the floor. I do rather appreciate not being carpet jerky for Mike to find...

My motto for the year is "Not goin' to Heaven in 2011".

TSUNALI TREASURY HUNT #4 Part 2

2010-11-27T10:13:00.000-08:00

This is the last part of our Treasury Hunt. I really hope you've enjoyed seeing all the lovely items we've made.

First is HollyStorm http://www.blogger.com/www.hollystorm.etsy.com She has fabric clutches, very interesting fabric bracelets and some jewelry.

This is my fave from her shop...I'm one of those odd people who happen to LIKE the colour Orange...

I'd wear it every day too. I still have a leather bracelet I made in 72 and all of the studded bracelets I wore in my metal days in the 80's...ahem...moving right along...

Next is another wonderful person. Barbrie777 http://www.barbrie777.etsy.com/ This shop has her jewelry, and her famous EarthMotherCollection. These wonderful people can even be found at our illustrious Smithsonian Museum. She has a supply shop too, but I'm not gonna give you the addy cuz I just saw some neat goodies for ME, so there...
This is one of her people:

Isn't he just handsome?

This is her prize for the contest, some lovely lavendar sachets:
Can't you just smell that? Oh you can't? bugger...Computers should come with scratch and sniff options or smell-o-vision...

Third on this list is my alter ego, AKiwiSilkie http://www.akiwisilkie.etsy.com/ This is my mundane shop whereas HowlingCaterpillars is more on the magickal side of things.

This shop has DreamWebs, destash that have been lurking in the cellar, jewelry and other goodies.

This is my prize for the contest, a Zodiac Bottle of your choice:

Our last tsunali is Promises,Promises http://www.blogger.com/www.promisespromises.etsy.com Her shop specializes in horses of all types along with some paintings and neat scrollwork ornaments.

This one of her horses is soooo me!"Do these wings make my butt look big?"

Her prize for the contest is a set of wooden scrollsaw horse ornaments.

That's it...darn it!

It's been really fun for me introducing the NA forum folks. Hope you've enjoyed your treasury hunting...

TSUNALI TREASURY HUNT #4 Part 1

2010-11-23T10:23:00.000-08:00

This is our last one...sad face. It's been fun introducing all my NA buddies to the world.

Let's review:
In our first Treasury Hunt, we had:
GrannieGirt
ClayDancer
Litapsilverj
CrippleCreekWoodWorks
1EggMan
JStinson
Beading4U
HeartWorks

Our Second Treasury Hunt featured:
NativeBeads
OhClaudia
SonoraKay
Vikotas
ForTheBrand
Sirocco
CandyThomas
SweetGrassValley
NightOwlMarket

Number Three had:
SpiritBear
SageHealer
KickingBear
WolfMoonTraders
Aneurythm
DreamWeaverSpirit
HowlingCaterpillars (me)
NikonMan
SoulfulStuff
Beading4U
HandyAnn
RodgerandDelilaPlace

For our Fourth and Final Treasury Hunt, we have:
Dove's Native Designs http://www.dovesnativedesigns.etsy.com/
Dove's shop has rattles made from snails and turtles, Walking Sticks, DreamCatchers, Drums, and War Clubs along with jewelry and pressed flower cards and wands.

Her prize is a Prayer Twist. It sends your prayers to the Great Spirit as it twists around in the wind. It's made from a Vine, Beads, a Turkey Feather, and Pheasant Feathers. What a beautiful gift for the person who has everything? A T-1 line right to the folks upstairs!

Next is MarinahLynn http://www.marinahlynn.etsy.com/

Her shop has fabric goods, from scented hotpads to warm/cold packs in neat colours. There's also crocheted market bags, drawstring bags, and heart shaped baby washcloths, along with hats, scarves, shawls, pillows, a Dreamcatcher, and a couple of beaded goodies.

Her Prize is this really neat Zebra Striped Flaxfilled Hot/Cold Therapy Pack. Just try and let anyone take it and say I didn't know it was yours! Ha!
This would be the only way to miss it!

After her is Beading4U. http://www.beading4u.etsy.com/

She has beadwork of all types. So her prize is a lovely beadwork bracelet. It's made of Clear, SkyBlue, and Chartreuse Green Glass beads with a Sterling Toggle Clasp. It reminds me of a clear summer sky and a lovely meadow.

And last for this group is VanFleetStreetDesign. http://www.vanfleetstreetdesign.etsy.com/

Her shop has neat paintings, photographs, ACEO's, and Nichos, sorta like printers boxes for your personal altar goodies. My faves are her El Dia Skellies.

This is her prize for the hunt, a mixed media ACEO titled Coyote Hears The Call:

Coyote is the Trickster God of the American SouthWest. He's one of my faves. He's a great teacher of What Comes Around, Goes Around...

Here's the link to this week's Treasury Hunt:

http://www.etsy.com/treasury/4cea5db3f0fa8eefc8353d7c/competition-native-american-forum?index=0

There's still plenty of time to look for the goodies. And still enough time to win!

TSUNALI TREASURY HUNT # 3 PARTS 2&3

2010-11-21T08:25:00.000-08:00

This is our third Treasury hunt with one more to follow...
Here's the link again:
http://www.etsy.com/treasury/4ce0fb0dadf56d910a2635e2/competition-native-american-forum#4ce947b46c8e8eefafe83b23

These are our tsunali for this treasury.

First up is Aneurythm. This lady's a trip! Her jewelry is magnificent! And she always makes us smile.
http://www.aneurythm.etsy.com/

This is her prize for the contest an Ojo de Venado necklace. Love the colours together.

I own a bunch of her orphans. And you never know what she might have lurking in her shop...but they're always special. Because she had a run in with a brain aneurysm (you don't need to feel sorry for her at all, she certainly doesn't) some of the proceeds from the purchase of her goodies go to the Brain Aneurysm Foundation in Hanover, MA.

Next is DreamWeaver Spirit. http://www.dreamweaverspirit.etsy.com/ She's rather new around the fire, coming all the way from old Blighty, but is another wonderful member. Her shop has everything from Breastplates to pentacles, chokers to wands.

This is her prize, a Zuni Peyote stitch bracelet. That's another of those hard things I wouldn't even do on a dare...bead weaving...heck NO!!! I could put the bear on and the ponys, but the others NOPE!

Nikonman is next, another of the brave men who hang out at our campfire. http://www.blogger.com/www.nikonman.etsy.com (Yes I skipped me) He takes photos that I have no chance of ever taking, so I drool and be envious.
His prize is called Meditation and it just blows me away everytime I see it...

Next is Soulful Stuff. http://www.soulfulstuff.etsy.com%20her/Her shop has mostly beautiful jewelry but she also has a section honouring the Cherokee people, along with fabric arts and photographs.

This is her prize for the contest, an earring/necklace set with dyed blue guinea fowl feathers and turquoise.

Guinea fowl aren't from guinea...but they look like mini cassowaries...see?

This is another of our newer Tsunali: Beading4U. http://www.blogger.com/www.beading4u.etsy.com Her shop was mostly bead work, but she managed to get her hubby to make some goodies for her too. My friends' beadwork just amaze me...*shakes head* I leave it to the experts thankfully.

This is her prize, a carved bear pawprint/arrowhead ornament carved from Red Oak.

Bear is a good strong medicine in Native Cultures. Plains Indians thought that shamans with bear medicine were the most powerful of them all. It also represents direction and was considered a good omen by some. We feel an affinity to bear because we also walk on the flat of our feet not on tiptoes like most other animals.

Next is HandyAnn, the Queen of our Treasuries and our other Tsunali from across the Pond. http://www.handyann.etsy.com/ She is a conservator. She makes antiques and other precious objects look like the day that they were made. She does some beadwork, some jewelry, and stained glass, but her niche is Temari tutorials. Temari are a traditional Japanese stitchery. I haven't tried it...mostly because I'd be sewing myself to the little ball...

This is HandyAnn's prize, a 5 pack of Tutorials so you can get addicted too!

Temari originated in China and migrated to Japan where they made it an art form. They're gorgeous when they're done...

Our last tsunali is the DH of GrannieGirt, aka RodgerandDelilasplace http://www.rodgeranddelilaplace.etsy.com/ Lots of lovely jewelry here. And affordable too. And some neat supplies.

This is the grandprize for the treasury hunt...it's just amazing

There's still plenty of time to get in on this...it ends at midnight eastern time tonight.
Good luck and have fun.

TSUNALI TREASURY HUNT #3 PART 1

2010-11-17T10:10:00.000-08:00

There's 11 awesome shops to look through for this one and one where it's a raffle prize.

Here's the link:
http://www.etsy.com/treasury/4ce0fb0dadf56d910a2635e2/competition-native-american-forum?index=0

So here we go!
First up is SpiritBearCreations. http://www.spiritbearcreations.etsy.com/
She's a Down-Eastah! Her shop has a great mix of items. She has bead work, totem/medicine bags, herbal goodies, fetishes, and her cookies are to die for!!! I think almost all of us tsunali have gotten some.

Her prize for the contest is a full dozen of her Leckerli.

The Name Spirit Bear refers to a rare type of Black Bear that is found in British Columbia. Instead of being Black, their fur is a creamy white with dark eyes, dark noses and light claws. They're not albinos or Polar bears even though they're white. It's a double recessive gene particular to these bears that gives them the odd colour if both the parents carry it.

Next is Sagehealer. http://www.sagehealer.etsy.com/

Her shop is full of wonderful and helpful shinies. I have one of her Totem Talismans as does my son. She has minerals, smudges, all sorts of goodies to help and heal.

This is her prize for the Treasury hunt, a Quantum Quattro Crystal:

Isn't that a gorgeous blue? Sorta reminds me of an iceberg...The stone is great for meditation, and clearness of thought, along with healing and communication.

Sage is one of the four Sacred Herbs of Native American culture along with cedar or juniper, lavendar, and sweetgrass. They help to purify a person, place or thing and bring in the good spirits.

Next is KickingBear, our Teacher. http://www.kickingbear.etsy.com/

He's teaching us Tsalagi...I hope we're coming along okay. We know one of the most important words. Kawi=Coffee...it's a necessity of life.

This is his prize for the contest, a Selu Ayatlidi (Corn necklace).

According to Cherokee myth, Selu was the Corn Mother or Maize. Her consort was Kanati, the Lucky Hunter. They were First Man and First Woman.

KB's necklaces commemorate the Trail of Tears, when the Cherokee people, along with the Muskogee(Creek), Seminoles and Choctaws, were forced off their ancestral lands and left to their own devices in "Indian Territory" also known as Oklahoma. 4,000 of the 15,000 Cherokee died along the way. Most of the Native Americans leaders and the people themselves never acknowledged the landgrab.

Last is WolfMoonTraders. http://www.wolfmoontraders.etsy.com/

She has pencil drawings, Smudge feathers, jewelry, Medicine bags, rattles and other neat items.

Her prize is a Turkey and Pheasant Smudge feather. It's lovely! Smudging Feathers are used for wafting the smoke from you smudge sticks around the person, place or thing you're smudged and lifts the smoke to the Great Spirit.

They say to use a feather from a bird that you feel an affinity too. Feathers that are gifted to you are the most powerful because they came from the affection that the bird has for you. Never pluck your bird to get a feather...it hurts them. It's like if your bird pulled out your hair by the roots. Except for dyed turkey feathers, the ones that I myself use come from the year's moult.

Don't forget to play and send off your answers. This treasury hunt goes until Sunday. So there's still plenty of time.

Tsunali Treasury Hunt #2 part 3

2010-11-12T07:26:00.000-08:00

This is the last bunch for this Treasury Hunt.

First up is CandyThomasGourdArt. This gal really IS out of her gourd! I eat pumpkin and squash pies and she makes ART out of the shells of all shapes and sizes of these magnificent fruits.

Gourds were one of the earliest plants to be cultivated by humans and were used as containers even before clay or pottery and are sometimes referred to as "Nature's Pottery".
Gourd skins were sometimes used as replacements for skull pieces in the NeoLithic period.
There's an old tale called "Follow the Drinkin Gourd" that tells how escaped and fleeing slaves would follow the Big Dipper to reach freedom in the North.

This is Candy's prize for the Treasury Hunt, the Turkey's Token pyrographed gourd with turkey feathers and horse hair.
Turkey was called the Blessing Eagle in many Native cultures because he gave everything of himself when asked.

Next up is SweetGrassValley. This gal does wonderful hairpipe and gemstone jewelry, and she paints too!!!

She has another shop called BumperstickersnMore, which has bumperstickers...lol

Hair pipes were introduced in the 1860's when the Native Americans saw the whites smoking pipes with bone pipe stems. The Native Americans made it hair pipes there own using them in breast plates and jewelry. Original bone pipes really were bone. This is QuannahParker wearing a hairpipe breastplate from the Smithsonian Collection.

Here's Sweet's prize for the Treasury Hunt: a leather anklet with silver bells and a silver feather:

Last friend for this Treasury Hunt is NightOwlMarket. She works with Pendelton fabric. And her goodies are just gorgeous! She has Christmas stockings, small goods, totes and possibles bag.
Pendelton Fabric is still made in Oregon in the good old US of A and has been since 1909 when the first Indian Trade Blanket rolled out of the factory.

If you go to the Pendelton site and click on the Legendary Blankets section I PROMISE you will be as speechless and overwhelmed as I was...
Pendelton is made from 100% virgin wool: wool that is sheared from the live sheep. It does not hurt the sheep. It's like when we get a haircut....

This is Owl's prize for the Treasury Hunt, a lovely turquoise with sun design possibles bag. You can put almost anything in them: roots, leaves, stones, feather, endless possibilities.

You can still get in on all the lovely goodies for this week up until Midnight eastern on Sunday.
Here's the link again:

http://www.etsy.com/treasury/4cd865f2163b6d9172c4aaad/competition-native-american-forum?index=0

Here's all the shops that are in this Treasury:

http://www.etsy.com/shop/Nativebeads

http://www.etsy.com/shop/vikotas

http://www.etsy.com/shop/SonoraKaysCreations

http://www.etsy.com/shop/ohclaudia

http://www.etsy.com/shop/SweetgrassValley

http://www.etsy.com/shop/Sirocco

http://www.etsy.com/shop/candythomasgourdart

http://www.etsy.com/shop/forthebrand

http://www.etsy.com/shop/NightOwlMarket

Tsunali Treasury Hunt #2 part 2

2010-11-10T05:06:00.000-08:00

First up is Vikotas aka Lavinia's Room. She does painting and multimedia art. She's been coming to the campfire for quite a while...bringing with her LOLcats, funny looking food and general fun stuff.

The prize from her shop is this really lovely beaded and leather piece of art called Rain Blessing.

In most cultures, NA or not, rain was considered a blessing. It helped the crops grow and the animals and people to thrive. You think of the rain dance, which DO work, I can tellya...which called on the Great Spirit to send the rain down...

Next is ForTheBrand. Her goodies are made of all sorts of semiprecious and gemstones...Turquoise, Coral and Sterling play a large part in her creations.

This is her prize for the Treasury Hunt: Hannah Earrings

I love/adore Turquoise. These are simple enough for everyday. Turquoise has been a highly valued gemstone for ages. It protects travellers, or against unnatural death. It's also a lovely calming stone.

Last for this group of talent is Sirocco, another of our gentlemen. He has jewelry for everyone. There's beaded, gemstones, Swarovski crystal, bone and sterling. Another drool worthy shop full of eye candy.

His prize is Native American Styled Tubular Peyote Stitch beaded earrings in Turquoise, White and Silver.

If you've noticed, beadwork is an important part of the Native American culture's type of adornments. You can find it on their clothing, in the ceremonial garb, as jewelry and as art on medicine bags and dance sticks. Some types of beading such as porcupine quilling was considered a form of prayer.

The original beads were natural items like antlers, bones, claws and teeth. Now the beads are usually glass seed beads, not that there's anything wrong with that. The only ancient type beads that are still made in the traditional ways are the Heishii of the Pueblo peoples.

Tsunali Treasury Hunt #2 Part 1

2010-11-08T17:40:00.000-08:00

So here we go with our first friend(oginali) from the Second Hunt: Native Beads.
To be majorly obvious, she does stuff with beads. She's even written a book about beads and techniques...

This is her prize for the Treasury Hunt:White Buffalo Calf Beaded Earrings.

White buffalo calves are Strong Medicine to the Native Americans. When White Buffalo Calf Woman returns, the world will return to beauty and harmony.

Next is Oh Claudia. She's one of the newer Tsunali but has fit in so well around our fire like she has always been there.

She's another beader. She does round ones and flat ones and you couldn't pay me enough to even pick up all them little beads...I think I'd miss so many that Obelisk would be laying Faberge eggs.

This is Oh Claudia's prize, a Turquoise, Red Jasper, Howlite and Silver beaded bracelet:

Last of this group is SonoraKaysCreations. Her shop has Dream Catchers, Virginian Creeper Wreaths, Jewelry, and even Dog Collars...sort of something for everyone.

Her prize is Chandelier Earrings. They'd be really awesome to wear out for New Years!

I'll post the next batch on Wed...so keep them eyeballs peeled, but please keep them away from Obelisk...

The rest of the Tsunali from the First Treasure Hunt

2010-11-05T10:50:00.000-07:00

Number on this list is 1EggMan. He's one of our few gents that can get a word in edgewise with all us hens cackling away. He carves eggs of all types with a dentist bur. Glad to know that can be used for something other than filling cavities.
He is owned by a rescued Doby named Takoda who's special in his own right.
This is Egg's prize for the Treasure Hunt. It's simple and elegant and just lovely.

Next up is JStinson. The originator of the Campfire. Her beadwork is amazing! I couldn't see half of them let alone DO anything with them.

Beading4U is a newer family member. Her beadwork is marvelous. There's more non traditional goodies in her shop, like triangles.

Her prize is Porcupine Quill beading earrings.
Brave woman to try and pluck Porky. This would SO be me...

Last up for this treasury is HeartWorks. She makes magnetic and handpainted Signs. They're always beautiful and colourful.

Her prize is a gorgeous Golden Eagle Feather. They stick AWESOME to your car!

Since we can't have the real thing, this is a great substitute. It also has a Sun Symbol on it representing the 4 Directions. And you also get the Blue Jay feather. Sweet Deal. Probably alot safer too...look at those Lee Press On Nails from Hell...

I hope you've enjoyed your jaunt through our Treasury Hunt. You still can get in until the 7th.
Our second Treasury Hunt starts on the 8th with still MORE prizes to win!

And don't forget to check out our sales also. Even more goodies. Do an all items search for "napromo" or "native forum" to see them. The sale goes until the 21st.

Tsunali from our First Treasure Hunt

2010-11-01T13:01:00.000-07:00

First up is Grannie Girt.
Her shop has some crocheted goods, some vintage and other goodies.
Her prize for the first Treasure Hunt Contest is this neat set:

It's crocheted with a silver feather and coyote claws. In Native American mythologies, Coyote is a trickster who's too smart for his own good sometimes.

Next is ClayDancerDesigns. Needless to say, she has clay goods in her shop. There's everything from platters to valets, magnets and outhouses.
This is the prize from Clay's shop:

Bear has the power of healing and of introspection.

After her is Litapsilverj who does miraculous things with silver and gemstones, and all types of jewelry.
This is her prize:

Eagle represents the ability to rise above things to get the full view.

And we're not sexist either. We have some gents who hang out with all us ladies.

This is one of them: CrippleCreekWoodWork. He has all sorts of woodcrafted items. They range from tables and vanities to cufflinks and earrings.

This is his prize:

Arrowheads are important to the Native culture because without them, the people would've starved and they can mean "alertness".

I'll put up the other four later on in the week.

National Native American Heritage Month

2010-11-01T02:48:00.000-07:00

The founder of our Native American Forum Thread on Etsy.com, JStinson, received this lovely letter from our President just the other day...

The White House

Office of the Press Secretary

For Immediate Release October 29, 2010 Presidential Proclamation--National Native American Heritage Month
-------
BY THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
A PROCLAMATION

For millennia before Europeans settled in North America, the indigenous peoples of this continent flourished with vibrant cultures and were the original stewards of the land. From generation to generation, they handed down invaluable cultural knowledge and rich traditions, which continue to thrive in Native American communities across our country today. During National Native American Heritage Month, we honor and celebrate their importance to our great Nation and our world.

America's journey has been marked both by bright times of progress and dark moments of injustice for American Indians and Alaska Natives. Since the birth of America, they have contributed immeasurably to our country and our heritage, distinguishing themselves as scholars, artists, entrepreneurs, and leaders in all aspects of our society. Native Americans have also served in the United States Armed Forces with honor and distinction, defending the security of our Nation with their lives. Yet, our tribal communities face stark realities, including disproportionately high rates of poverty, unemployment, crime, and disease. These disparities are unacceptable, and we must acknowledge both our history and our current challenges if we are to ensure that all of our children have an equal opportunity to pursue the American dream. From upholding the tribal sovereignty recognized and reaffirmed in our Constitution and laws to strengthening our unique nation-to- nation relationship, my Administration stands firm in fulfilling our Nation's commitments.

Over the past 2 years, we have made important steps towards working as partners with Native Americans to build sustainable and healthy native communities. The American Recovery and Reinvestment Act continues to impact the lives of American Indians and Alaska Natives, including through important projects to improve, rebuild, and renovate schools so our children can get the education and skills they will need to compete in the global economy. At last year's White House Tribal Nations Conference, I also announced a new consultation process to improve communication and coordination between the Federal Government and tribal governments.

This year, I was proud to sign the landmark Affordable Care Act, which permanently reauthorized the Indian Health Care Improvement Act, a cornerstone of health care for American Indians and Alaska Natives. This vital legislation will help modernize the Indian health care system and improve health care for 1.9 million American Indians and Alaska Natives. To combat the high rates of crime and sexual violence in Native communities, I signed the Tribal Law and Order Act in July to bolster tribal law enforcement and enhance their abilities to prosecute and fight crime more effectively. And, recently, my Administration reached a settlement in a lawsuit brought by Native American farmers against the United States Department of Agriculture that underscores our commitment to treat all our citizens fairly.

As we celebrate the contributions and heritage of Native Americans during this month, we also recommit to supporting tribal self-determination, security, and prosperity for all Native Americans. While we cannot erase the scourges or broken promises of our past, we will move ahead together in writing a new, brighter chapter in our joint history.

NOW, THEREFORE, I, BARACK OBAMA, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and the laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim November 2010 as National Native American Heritage Month. I call upon all Americans to commemorate this month with appropriate programs and activities, and to celebrate November 26, 2010, as Native American Heritage Day.

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand this twenty-ninth day of October, in the year of our Lord two thousand ten, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred and thirty-fifth.

BARACK OBAMA

We of the Native American Campfire Thread are commemorating this Month with thread-wide sales.

Our sale will go from November 1st, today, until November 21st. There's beadwork, dreamcatchers, jewelery, woodcrafts, pottery,carved eggs and gourds, clothing, artwork of all types and other doodads...the holidays are fast approaching so this is a great time to pick up some one of a kind goodies for your loved ones and yourself.

Along with the sale we also have a Treasury Hunt set up by our very own HandyAnn, from England. She lives on a boat on a canal...isn't that just nifty?
There's the link to that bit of fun:

http://www.etsy.com/treasury/4ccda390b0b68eef4ca0d167/competition-native-american-forum

And there will be a couple more Treasury Hunts also so keep an eyeball peeled for those too...just keep the eyeballs aways from Obelisk...she happens to think that eyeballs and grapes are the same thing...

To find more goodies go to www.etsy.com and type in "napromo" or "native forum" and our items will appear for your perusal.

Thanks so much for looking and enjoy!

Just in time for Halloween...creepy stuff...

2010-10-30T16:27:00.001-07:00

None of this is bullshit...it's actually happened...and to ME!!! eek!!!

The house I grew up in was never happy...and I had never felt comfortable there. It had never been a home. There were 4 generations living there: my GreatGrandmother, Grandparents, mother and my sister and I.

My great-grandmother died in the house in 1986, the start of a Hellacious year. She had broken both hips at different times and it was a stroke that finally did her in. On January 1st 1986 at 10 in the morning. My mother and I were cleaning her up to get her ready for the day...that was the first person I ever saw die, come to think of it...wasn't really scary...just breathing then not...
She was 92 and had lived a good life, I would think.

My grandmother wore the pants in the family. There was no insubordination, backtalk or differing opinions...she was the female version of Archie Bunker.

My mother was sort of a non-entity. She never had a backbone. She got pregnant, got married, was taken away from the husband, got a divorce and never dated, remarried or had any other form of life outside the house really except for school and jobs.
She also died in the house on July 23,1998. My son and I were going to go over there that very day and WE would've found the carcass...eeekkk...great for a 5 year old to see. But he said he wasn't feeling well so we didn't....lucky us...

I had been told that psychic crap doesn't exist since I was little...but...I remember being very small, maybe 4-6, and being in my bed but not really. I remember being both in bed and going downstairs. My grandmother and some of her friends were playing cards. The next morning I told my grandmother about what I had seen, down to the cards and I was punished for lying...even though I hadn't been. I was told that noone can be in two places at once and I had to be lying because it wasn't possible...well maybe not in HER philosophy.

I am a cardiac care patient and have had two corrections of Tetralogy of Fallot. During one of the procedures I managed to die...hmm...well, whatyouknowaboudat?
I even made the papers as "Congratulations, a local girl has died"...umm...scuse me? Sorta the tone for my life, I guess.Sorta explains a lot...

Later on, as a teenager, my sister had a couple of friends come over and we all, yeah me too, made up a ouija board. Digging through stuff in the attic had always been fun...until I found a picture of a demon that my Aunt Sue's ex husband had painted...Gods know why it ended up there, but it did...Methinks that might've been a second strike for the house...you make it, name it, and it lives...like Frankenstein's monster...The name of it was the name of a city/town in MA and whenever I hear the name I STILL get chills up my spine.
We got not much that first night...so we kept at it. Pretty soon it was a family sort of thing...have nothing going on let's get out the ouija board...Thank the Gods for computers these days...something else to do...

The house I lived in "allegedly" had been built by the Finlayson family. Haven't found too much or anything at all to go on...but I haven't really tried either...but that's neither here nor there. And I had been told that it was made out of driftwood from shipwrecks...wouldn't have surprised me in the least...lotsa a shipwrecks in the area and Gods know they might've been "helped" a bit, nod, wink. "Wreckers" would lure ships onto rocks and shoals and beaches and steal the cargo, kill the people and generally just be mean and miserable and cheap Yankees...

I mean living in a house where you didn't really feel comfortable leaving the main floor after dark has to have something to it, KWIM?

About this time I managed to start practicing witchcraft...not the cutesy new age "spelloramus" shite that they say is nice fuzzy kitty bunny stuff, but one step away from sacrificing children, using blood sacrifices black magick. That added another "fun" dimension to teenaged angst, personality conflicts (mostly myself and my grandmother) and just general unhappiness and I'm sure mental illness and alcoholism didn't help either.

Back to the Ouija story, we wound up getting an entity who told us his name and that he was part of the Brinks Job and that we could find his loot by going in the attic and finding the hole where he had put it...

We even managed to get him to "appear" to us and took a picture...we got a picture of the wall with a bright white spot on it...

The last time I used or even touched a ouija board was when my GGM was still alive...we were at the usual Sunday session when the doorbell rang. So it must've been the early 80's, when I was truly walking on the dark side...It was my mother, me and my grandmother. I don't even remember what was being asked or anything else. The doorbell rang and my grandfather went to get it. It was my Aunt and Uncle. We had all gotten up from the table and were nowhere near the board or the glass. It spelled out "there is a nonbeliever here" and threw itself against the side of the fridge where my great grandmother was sitting.

They still give me the fucking creeps and if you wanna use one, feel free, but this old crone won't do it...

These are a few pictures of the house...If it burnt to the ground, I might feel a bit bad that I didn't do it myself, but not much else...

My sister and I couldn't get in...well we could've...but it wasn't worth going to jail for...the two back decks are new. The stoop on the front is new as well as all the windows and the siding.

I posted these on another site that was dedicated to the paranormal and didn't give any extras, or details and this is what they said... And my replies:

In the first photo, my attention is drawn to the very top window on the right. I don't know why, but I keep looking at that window.

In the last photo I seem to get the feeling of a small child running around and playing with a fairly large ball on that top verandah/porch/deck whatever it's called. I can't make out if it's a boy or a girl - probably somewhere between 6 and 9 yrs old, I think (I find it hard to judge a person's age).

That's all I'm getting, sorry.

Thanks, Theadebra...I'll see if more people want to chime in before I give the answer.

Looking again.

On the second floor with the tree windows - the window on the extreme left, I think there is a woman standing there. I get the feeling of young-ish, perhaps somewhere in her 30's maybe older. Fairly long hair, swept back from her face. I can't tell if she is waiting for someone or if she is watching the person taking the photos.

Alrighty then, I'll wrap this one up...
This was the house I grew up in.
It was made out of driftwood, supposedly from shipwrecks.
Three people died there: the woman from the original family who had it built, my Great Grandmother and my Mother.
It was never a happy place...there were always undercurrents of sadness and gloom.
My cousin bought the place for dirt cheap from the estate when my Grandfather died.
He's been the one doing all the updating on the place. I think his son would be in that age range, Thea.

On the second floor, the middle and far right windows were my Great Grandmother's room. The far left one was the linen closet, and one I used to crawl out of to get Tiger, our cat, off the roof.

The top floor was the attic and my mother slept there and I did too for all of a day...I heard a BanSidhe and that was that.

There were a few Poltergeist phenomena, one time of red glowing eyes , but most it was just unhappiness.

Even though I'm chiming in on this one, and you already mentioned unhappiness, and I do agree. The first three I felt the feeling of sadness and emptiness, and the last one I felt feelings of frustration. (Even though at this point it would be a bit hard to believe. Because I read your answer before giving you what I felt from the picture)

Though I do want to mention I get the feelings of being somewhat "Secretive", Isolation a bit along the lines of that.

Thanks, Sting.
Isolation was a big part of my and my sister's childhood. We never had friends over, never had friends really. We could never go to anyone's house either.
It was very frustrating living with all the generations there. An estrogen overload.

not looking at anybodys answers the first thing that came to me was screaming, like someone just found someone lying dead in the attic. someone keeps pacing back and forth on the flat roof part, they are pissed about something, i keep thinking maybe its just my eyes and i'm seeing things but i keep seeing a figure near the chimney, its asking for help. 3rd window on the bottom i keep seeing a face.someone pacing on the grass going "oh no! oh no! you gotta help him" cellar door i'm getting alot of screaming, alot of it! someones buried underneath the house, death. fire, screaming, suicide is what i'm getting from this place. i had my roomate look at the pictures he said he cant pick up anything and what i'm picking up is alot of stuff from the past

The house was made originally out of driftwood from shipwrecks. It's gotta be over 100 years old by now. I never ever went into the cellar after dark. Or the attic. One of the stories that we had gotten through a ouija board was that one of the men from the Brinks Job stashed some of his money in the attic.
My mother was found dead in the bathtub on the second floor, not pictured. My great grandmother died in her bedroom on the second floor (in the first pic the windows on the middle and the right.
Suicide doesn't surprise me because that's what I thought my mother did.
We had a fire growing up. The furnace blew up.

wow so i got a few things right! hiiii Spotted, well seeing your house was made from driftwood from shipwrecks i wouldnt be surprised if a spirit or spirits are attached to your home. As far as your mom committing suicide i would say yes she did and pills are coming to mind? someone took alot of pills. wow your furnace blew up??? no wonder i heard a big boom as well as screaming, i thought i was picking up a big thunderstorm, also your mom is on that porch in the last picture she watches over you all the time

To be honest, NOT taking pills, the ones prescribed for her and drinking like a fish was probably what did her in...but an OD wouldn't have surprised me either. There wasn't an autopsy done because my Uncle who was a cop didn't want it.
I think she's probably stuck in the house. If she did commit suicide, it was to make a point and it went too far.

The blonde in the last picture is my twin sister.

thats what i pick up, she didnt exactly mean to kill herself it just went too far and nobody was home to help her out and she was attempting to do it for attention but with the mix of alcohol and whatever she took didnt mix well

We had a few knocking deals, the red glowing eyes staring out from the wall just scared the fuck out of me...it was too Amityville fucking horror...The true last straw came when I had fixed up the upstairs attic bedrooms so that I'd have a place just to get away...I had a room for my desk and a bedroom...well that only lasted as long as one night...until I heard a banshee...I never slept in the attic again... Well you can look at this and think I'm as nutty as a bag of PayDays...fine...but it's true every word...

How I found my place on the Medicine Wheel...

2010-10-26T05:05:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you find yourself wondering if you're the person you were supposed to be or if you're in the right place on the Wheel...the only one who can decide is you...

It's taken me YEARS to find mine...and I should've known instead of muddling along, falling off the Pollen Path, straying from the Red Road...

Now with my Tsunali (Friends in Cherokee) I have found my place, my focus, my home.

This campfire signifies our community. Everyone is welcome to warm their bones, have some kawi, eat some frybread, listen to songs and stories...

The first two parts of my blog tell about how I met these wonderful folks...

This is the personal part. The one that is the story of how I ended up at the fire...

I lost my way quite early. My head was always in the clouds and my face in a book. I was always searching...didn't know exactly what for...but I found it.

I learned about Vision Quests and Astral Projection...they're quite similar in their way.

Wiki describes a Vision Quest as a Rite of Passage. Very true. Most Native Americans have a version of this. Some use sweat lodges. Some use herbs and other substances to attune the person to the Spirit World. It is where the child gets their grown up name, sometimes their Totem Animal and their ultimate position in life.

Astral Projection is your "soul" leaving your body due to fasting, prayer, meditation, lucid dreaming or even extreme stress.

This was the first and only time that I had done this...I haven't been on a Vision Quest since...

I found myself flying cross the country until a light caught my eye. I swooped down and found a tepee. The flap was open and there was smoke wafting from the smoke hole. I flew in and settled on a rock. This Native American man that I had never met, let alone ever seen, turns from his conversation with the others and welcomes me by saying. "Welcome, WhiteSpottedCrow. I've been waiting for you."

We smoked and talked...I don't remember exactly what about... A while later, at least a year, I was reading my Fate Magazine and there was a picture of the man that I had talked to!!

Floyd "Kanghi Duta(Red Crow)" Westerman! This was before "Dances With Wolves" came out, if I remember correctly also...

I tried to tell my family and they just thought I was a loon...oh well their loss.

A few years later and I had kept this wonderful memory to myself, enjoying recalling the experience as the miraculous and wonderfu event that it was, especially since to the best of my knowledge, I have no Native blood whatsoever.

Even later when I was working too many hours and too many days, I spontaneously astral projected: no funny stuff, no alcohol, no nothing...

I was met outside my window by the HUMUNGOUS jet black buffalo! Not that they're running around loose here. He took me running. And I mean running...for hours and hours, miles and miles...I'd get home when the dawn was breaking physically exhausted, but mentally refreshed. I'd feel the road under my hooves and the wind flying through my mane...so Shapeshifting, SkinWalking in Navajo parlance, was part of the deal too.

This happened for months in a row, sometimes every day, sometimes once a week...depending on how stressed out I was. He finally told me his name was "Charger." I had forgotten it until I was selling shoes and the name on the box was Charger Black. You could've knocked me over with a feather!!!

When I worked for World of Science I found out that he was big for a reason...He was a Bison Antiquus. An animal that had been hunted by Paleo-Indians during the last Pleistocene Ice Age...They were 25% larger than today's American Bison. Another link in a chain of events...

Finally, one night, Charger didn't come around...I felt his loss. I did more research and found that some of your totems are with you for life and others come around just when they're needed. Obviously, I NEEDED him at that time...

I have an Aunt, my mother's sister. My mother was adopted so there's no blood relation, but we have always gotten along. She was made an honorary Navajo when she was wandering around the SouthWest. She taught me how to make Dream Catchers. I will ALWAYS be grateful to her for that.

I read up on the culture and found another wonderful "person". Kokopelli, the hunchbacked, always happy to see you, mythical fluteplayer, fertility God of the SouthWest.

Katsinas (kachinas) are another part of the wonderful SouthWestern cultures. I've also learned about the Rotten Belly Tribe of the Plains Indians...the ones who show you how NOT to do things. They'd make noise during ceremonies, just be generally contraries...I think my son is part of this Society...he'd make Mother Theresa wanna pop him one. The Rotten Bellies quite similar to the Koshari (Sacred Clowns) of Hopi Culture.

I've always said Hello to the Eagles/Hawks when I see them. And I say Hi to the snakes in the yard. I even had a family of Crows in the yard for a while. I took a fallen yearling to the Wildlife Centre when noone else would stop. Birds seem to be one of my Totems, along with Bear, Wolf, Dog, Otter, Skunk. I have a chicken as my witch's familiar...

Need I say who rules the roost?

So I continue on my path, wearing my tacky sox, comfy ripped jeans and trying to impart knowledge, peace, healing, humour, as I go...

And by the end of my life, I hope to hear, she was a pain in the ass, but I'll miss her...

More of my Tsunali

2010-10-22T10:20:00.000-07:00

JStinson is also known as Joni. She's part Cherokee and Creekand is an enrolled member of the Muskogee Creek Nation. This is her shop on Etsy:
http://www.etsy.com/shop/jstinson
Lotsa eye candy to be drooled over in there.
And she has a blog also.
http://www.jstinson-trailoftreasures.blogspot.com/
Where you can see that she's a beautiful outside as she is on the inside.

If Joni is our Mother, then KickingBear is our Father.
He's teaching us the Western dialect of Tsalagi (Cherokee) which we've been soaking up like sponges with pretty good results.

He's also an excellent artist (but don't let Coastal Artist know I said that) One of my favourite goodies in his shop is the Corn Necklace. It represents the Trail of Tears.
http://www.etsy.com/listing/58797947/selu-ayatlidi-corn-necklace

Some of my closest buddies in no particular order are:

ClayDancerdesigns who lives in my lovely State of Massachusetts. This is one of my faves from her shop: http://www.etsy.com/listing/41120036/zodiac-platter

Sagehealer who has recently moved cross country. I have this goodie from her shop. Eagle/Hawk is one of my totems. http://www.etsy.com/listing/59370818/hawk-totem-guide-for-grounding-vision

Brie aka barbie777 She makes these wonderful People: http://www.etsy.com/listing/50709284/cherokee-little-people

CandyThomasGourdArts Her gourds are to die for! http://www.etsy.com/listing/32468169/gourd-art-shamans-gift

SpiritBearCreations. You cannot die until you've had her Leckerlii! http://www.etsy.com/listing/53204896/holiday-leckerli-cookies-13

PromisesPromises. She makes the sweetest horses. This one is too me. http://www.etsy.com/listing/22305048/sodo-these-wings-make-my-butt-look-big

FortheBrand. Gorgeous jewelry like this one:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/50766887/sandra-turquoise-necklace

NativeBeads. She WROTE this book. I am jealous. http://www.etsy.com/listing/27631658/illustrated-bead-bible-book-free

There's also:

AnimalsandIcons, rekamepip, dalerocks, nikonman, whitebuffalo, sirocco, taxco, timberlineltd, cabinwindow, and many others. There's even some new friends like Vikotas, 4directions, beading4you, handyann, NightOwlMarket.

All of these fine folks and many more will be honouring their ancestors and our campfire family this November 1-21, Native American Month.

There will be sales and promotions and prizes galore.

So pull up a log, wrap up in your Pendelton blankets, toss some branches on the fire, have some frybread and have lots of fun with us...

My Tsunali (Friends in Cherokee)

2010-10-21T10:14:00.000-07:00

This post is for my new, as of last November-ish friends. They say that Like calls to Like and Birds of a Feather and all that...but these people have become even more than friends. They are more of a family...

Last November there was a thread started on the Etsy promo section. A lovely lady who's known as Jstinson there posted this:
"President Obama has declared November to be National Native American Month and November 29 to be National Native American Day."

Sirocco was the first person that she promoted. He does wonderful work with beads and Turquoise. The next person she promoted to bump the thread was herself and her gorgeous beadwork. It rather snowballed from there.

Joni had expected just to have a month where the Native Americans on Etsy, and there's a BUNCH of em to let you know, could promote their items. I came in about page 400 of the first thread...and now we're about halfway through our SIXTH thread.

As we show off our goodies, we've showed off others' goodies too and they've joined in too. We have a core group of a dozen or so that bring kawi (Cherokee for coffee) and eats to our virtual campfire. We have a story time at 8PM-ish Indian Standard Time on Wednesday nights and a Roast of one of our friends every last Thursday of the month.

Some of us lucky folks have gotten to meet each other. That's one of my aims for next summer. I have two tsunali that live in New England. We talk about our families, our pets, our joys and sorrows. Many of us may never meet face to face and we may not all be Native American...but believe me, we walk the Pollen Path/Red Road together and it is all osda.

My April Adventure~~OY!

2010-05-20T16:42:00.000-07:00

Let’s just hope the rest of ‘10 isn’t as exciting…it was bad enough to tear a rotator cuff and come home to a broken into house on the same day in March, but what the Hell?! Dudes!!!
April was a bit much, ya know?!

I had been having heart palpitations since March…dunno what caused it, coulda been practically anything from too much caffeine (yeah right, no such thing) to an earthworm farting underground in Mongolia….whatever…

They’d been lasting a couple of minutes, where it felt like my heart would explode out of my chest and flop around on the floor like a Magikarp…then it would settle down and I could get back to whatever I was doing…now it wasn’t like I was running a marathon or hand to hand combat, just sitting, being in bed…there was no rhyme or reason to why they’d start up.

I was using some Zen/Yoga/breathing techniques to settle the poor muscle back down and it had worked, at least up until the 22nd.

This time NOTHING was working. I was hoping it was just seeing Russell Crowe and Evan Lysacek on Ellen…guess not…this time the palpitations started around 9 and just didn’t stop…I was getting dizzy and lightheaded, and then I started the cold sweats, dry heaves, and radiating pain down my right arm…Shit! Now, female heart attacks aren’t like male heart attacks…guys will usually have chest pain, shortness of breath and radiating pain going down the left arm, but not all the time either though…we’re more likely to feel nauseous and have trouble sleeping, indigestion, and feel tired. No trouble sleeping, but as for the feeling tired…yep…had that one…I’d get his Highness-ness off to school and go back to bed to at least 10!

He was off of school that week so I didn’t hafta get up and get his ass in gear, so I was able to sleep in a bit later.
I had gotten up to a rusty hinge sound and was like wtf? I came down and it was Obelisk crowing…now that dippy bird knew there was something wrong me! She had been getting closer and closer when we went up to nap…she started at the other side of the bed, and the day before all this crap she was pressed up against my side…and then on my kneecap…I shoulda known to listen to the damned bird!!! She’s nevah cuddly or wanting to be anywhere near ya unless you’ve got chow…

So I grabbed some clothes and got dressed and went to the bathroom…I tried to get Obelisk to go up the stairs and wake Mike up by crowing at him…no such luck…She went Splort on the stairs instead, so I went up and got him up and had him call 911. The bus arrived shortly while I got my wallet and phone. No reason for house keys…I presumed someone would be there when I got back. I had Mike call Ernie and tell him to come home right away…Obelisk went on the porch and I went out and got met on the walk by the EMT’s. I know that one was blond and husky and the other was dark and thinner. I had my vitals taken and was hooked up to IV and O2. Lovely. They asked all sortsa questions…but they couldn’t get a BP on the left side…no shit…noone can…I had to tell em that you couldn’t because of the surgeries I had when I was little…

So off to South Shore Hospital I go…glad it wasn’t too busy…but then coming in by ambulance and being a cardiac patient…you go straight to the head of the line…everyone out of the way! Too bad if you’re holding a limb in your hand or you have an ax sticking out of your head.

Ernie got there by 11, I think…it was all becoming rather a blur…the EMT’s/Paramedics gave me some Adenosine 6, first then 12, to get the heart rate down and it didn’t do a damned thing…At South Shore, I got 12 more…around noon I think it slowed a tiny bit…by then I had had a gaggle of doctors going in and out. More times than not they left scratching their heads. Finally we had a Cardiologist come in who was part of the practice where my cardiologist practices…that one wasn’t in nor was the one that did the ablation in 03...But this guy got it in a nutshell! Dr. Tony Marks said, “I’m a plumber, you need an electrician.” So I was packed up to move to Brigham and Women’s in town. I had the IV, I had enough EKG’s to light a small town, a chest Xray, blood taken, and had the Defibrillator pads stuck on just in case they needed it…At South Shore, they thought about putting me under and shocking me…eep…Thank the Gods they didn’t have to…I KNOW that even being under it wouldn’t have been any fun at all.
As they were getting me ready to go, it was just in time because there was a car accident that was coming in with lots of people…wonder how they made out…
One of the Transport EMT’s looked like a cross between the gay paramedic from Trauma and Artie, the Quincy Fire Man that used to live across the street. He had a buncha tribal tats and are pissah cuff watch…I think I’ll have to have one of those…nevah loose a watch that way. I got carted off and stuffed into another bus for the ride to Brigham and Womens…I swear to the Gods noone got out of the way of the friggin ambulance…I suggested putting a rocket launcher on the top or a cow catcher to shove the ijits outta the way. They had the siren going and the lights too…and people were still ignoring this beastie coming up their asses and not moving…I think anyone who doesn’t get out of the way of emergency vehicles should be shot! Or at least incinerated, muthafuckas…
I can also attest to the fact that they’re not a comfy ride. I will take a long ride in Xicoh or Smokey anytime before another ambulance ride. I kept asking if they were running over SmartCars or Mini’s…
At least I hope I was good for comic relief…
At Brigham’s I got put into room 14...it was the one after 12 and they kicked a little old lady out of it to make room for me…made me feel like shit fur shur. The ER doctor guy was a cute little Armenian named Chris…good humoured and everything else. He also was part of Comic Con. He’d gather up used comic books to send to our troops. How cool is that?

I was there FOREVAH!!! I think I got there around two and I didn’t get to a room til like 10 PM. No food or anything!!! I had so much Saline solution going into me, I kept having to pee. Now since I was hooked up like something from a horror movie there was no way I could get up to go to the bathroom…Chris brought me this teeny plastic thing and gave me some privacy…listen folks, my aim ain’t good on a GOOD day and it wasn’t a good day…sheesh, but I managed to pee…swear they needed to pry the little piece of plastic outta my arse…I remember the good old days of the ice cold bed pans straight outta the meat locker…Pink plastic does NOT a bedpan make…

Ernie showed up…I guess his GPS had him going all over creation, but I think she did it to get back at him for making wrong turns…I was getting more EKG’s and I *think* I was getting more adenosine, but damned if I can remember for sure…of course the defibrillator was on battery and the whole time I was in the ER I went through 4 battery packs…hmmm…guess they don’t use Energizers hehe

I remember them haggling over whether they were gonna send me to a regular nursing floor or the Cardiac floor. Ernie told me that the Charge nurse on the regular floor was getting her knickers in a twist because she didn’t want me to monopolize all the nurses/doctors/go-fers on her floor…I was stable, hadn’t had any more palpitations so I was deemed ready to go up to the regular floor.

In the meantime, there was a drunk guy who came in for Gods only know what reason. I figured there was gonna be a riot. He didn’t want them to take his bottle, but after a half an hour, he gave it up. They gave him a blanket and he wanted it over his head. And that settled him down…I dunno why he wasn’t PC’d” put in Protective Custody until he dried out, but it wasn’t like mob scene busy either.

I got a room with a lady who had had a stroke. She wasn’t really in this world, and she had the music channel playing classical…whatever…I had the ball game on and got food too…om nom. I was starving which didn’t help anything. I had steak tips to die for and a mashed sweet potato. I think I’ll go to that restaurant again LOL So I have a new herd of doctors/assistants/nurses/gofers coming in and examining me…no palpitations so they’re checking me out: BP, IV, EKG, lungs, the whole shooting match…The head of this herd looked like the love child of Russell Brand, the English comic and David Blaine…he was sorta dippy acting like Russell Brand too…I dunno…then I had another doctor call me up because he had something to do with adult patients that had had surgery done at Children’s like me…He seemed okay. Asked lots of questions and stuff…I was tired, hungry and wanted to watch the ball game…Ernie had to go home because Mike had been by himself except for an hour or so when Ernie had stopped by between hospitals.

I’m watching the game and they examining me and I’m yelling at the TV because the Sox are doing stupid stuff…no palpitations…then all of a sudden they start when I’m just lying back…Mad scramble commences. I get more of the adenosine stuff…I think it was 6 again. Not working. They had to go running around looking for more of the stuff…sheesh…they had only had the one syringe. Found some more. Gave another 6, then a few minutes later, 12...still nothing…meanwhile there’s reams and reams of paper coming out of the EKG machine…Happy Earth Day…there goes a whole friggin forest. I mean I could’ve wallpapered my whole house!!!
“Interesting design, Is it York or Marburg?”
“Nope, my EKG…”

LOL

So now I’m getting the bum’s rush to the Cardiac Unit because all of the nurses/doctors/assistants/go-fers are in my room marveling…
“We can’t have you taking up all our staff’s time because there’s other patients here that need things too.”
Like I’m being a fucking DIVA and wanting white wall to wall carpeting and white fluffy kittens…damnation!!
“Listen sister, I’m just fucking laying here, trying to watch a ball game and not have my heart flop onto the floor, don’t give me no fucking ‘tude bitch!” was what I wanted to say…

So I call Ernie and tell him that I’m getting moved…this is like 11.

About 12 I call him back. I’m in my new room…Holy SHIT! It’s like a fucking hotel room…wow! Single room too. It was HUGE! Hardwood floors, a view, a huge bathroom, a fold out bed, and flat screen TV…

Too bad I can’t really enjoy it…I have IV’s, EKG leads, pads for the defibrillator and on top of everything else in this wonderful day, I have my period…pfft.

At this point, I’m friggin tired and just wanna sleep…I fell asleep before the end of the game…dammit…I get woken up for a blood draw. Oh Joy. Here, use my tampax…then for meds and change the IV…shitonastick can’t a body sleep in the hospital! I can’t remember the names of all the nurses, blood suckers, doctors, food folks…too many people trooping in and out…

Russell Brand came back through…and a Greek girl, Ionna can’t remember the last name from the other floor…I think she was a cardiologist, but don’t hold me to it. Another doctor called Sasha, who was a trip; and AnneMarie Valente, Dave Chokshi, an Indian guy who was really nice. Tons and TONS of newly minted residents…and an endocrinologist or two…

The doctor who called the previous night came through to see me, Michael Landzberg.…A New York Jewish guy…oy…but I like him…he knew the doctors that had done my surgery way back in the early Paleolithic Era, William Bernhardt and Grant LaFarge. I don’t remember much about Bernhardt except for his lack of bedside manner and his taking out of my stitches…along with waking up and asking for water during on of my other catheterizations…LaFarge reminded me of Harold Gould…he was very handsome and tall.

Now it’s Friday. And they’re telling me I’m scheduled for an MRI over at Children’s. Okay…because of the BACH team which Dr. Landzberg is part of. BACH isn’t the JS dude that did the pretty music. BACH is the Boston Adult Congenital Heart service. Since I HAVE a congenital heart defect…I’m in like Flynn.

So I eat my breakfast and wait and wait and wait…It’s about 2 and I’m missing the end of Criminal Intent…dammit…but I’m taken through the hiways and byways of Brigham and Womens and Childrens. I get there and the gal is like we’ve updated your information…Wait a friggin minute…I haven’t been here since Cave Men were being chased by Smilodons…What the Hell do you MEAN you updated my information!?? I woulda thunk that mice woulda made nests out of papers that old…jeeze this was like the late 60’s…

Whatever…
I get all of the electrode thingees taken off again…because the MRI machine is always on and they’re metal ya know…not a good thing to be stuck to the damned thing til Doomsday.
So I get to get all strapped in and processed and one of the tests is supposed to use dye…you’re supposed to say something if you are allergic to shellfish…well I am and so I did. The Nurse that was with me was very nice. She was Chinese and came from Toronto to go to school…and stayed.

But I guess they don’t use the shellfish dyes anymore…so much for me wearing Tyrian purple…so I’m getting my instructions like press the button if you need to come out blah blah…hold breath when we say and all that…

I get some rock so that’s good…get stuffed in…must’ve been the junior sized tube because it was way too tight of a squeeze. My left arm was sorta up on my stomach holding the magic button, and my right arm was half under me…I’m doing okay…ladeedee…Now it’s time to take the deep breaths…oh FUCK me!! The chest plate that they have me sandwiched into BUMPS the top of the tube…OMFG!! You have GOT to be kidding…this thing is too Fucking SMALL! Breath stupid, you’ll be okay…nope…wasn’t working…Deep breath, bump top. Hold breath, bump top…this is fucking ridiculous…now I’m starting to freak…my happy place is way too far away…I ain’t gonna make it…fuck this…now my asthma starts in too…oh joy…I’m pressing the button like I’m gonna smash it flat…I’m a celebrity Get Me OUTTA here!!!

I’m slid out at the pace of glacier…I’m wheezing and ready to run for the hills…I’m unvelcroed and they had to have someone run out and find an inhaler. Which they have to hold onto tightly or it gets sucked into the machine too. I have all sorts of folks running all around. I got about halfway through the whole test which was supposed to be 45 minutes to an hour. I lasted about a half an hour. And my left shoulder with the rotator cuff injury wasn’t helping anything…cuz the position it had been stuck in was killing me. The tech wanted to know if I could continue or if they should just pack it in…I was like I’m done…stick a fork in me…

Of course, I get out and have all the stickers put back on …pfft and there’s a cute guy wearing corduroy pants putting himself back together. Me being me says. “Damn I missed the cute guy stripping for me..” poor kid turned bright red…so the nurse and I go back to the room and wait for me to be taken back to my room. We wind up watching the new Batman movie with Christian Bale and Morgan Freeman…not a bad way to spend some time.

In the meantime Ernie’s been calling the room and I’m not there…we waited soo long for someone to bring me back to the Shapiro Building. I think I got there around 5...dang…missed…But I talked to Ernie and that was good anyways…

More blood more IV’s etc…SSDD…I had a nice commode to use. And I had Ernie get me my hair brush, tooth brush and hair scrunchies/elastics.

Oh yeah I forgot about the really cute blond guy, not that I like blonds all that much, but he was nice and had a Southern Accent…I wanna say Tennessee, but don’t hold me to that either. He gave me a Cardiac Ultrasound…very gentle too…

AND I keep having IV’s moved around…dang…I had one in the crook of my right arm and every time someone tried to take my BP they’d squish the needle…At least I talked them into taking my pressure on my right ankle…

Saturday I wake up with pig fingers…holy crap…I had little sausages…SSDD…man I was eating good though…but the first day I forgot to get milk for my coffee. The second morning I got it, but they forgot my yoghurt. The last day I was there, I asked for milk and didn’t get it…and got ice cream instead of yoghurt oh well…

I was peeing like you wouldn’t believe too…sheesh…I was filling the commode every time I pee’d. One of the nurses smuggled me in a diet Coke…all they had was Pepsi…eek…The food was really good even if it was dietetic. I had Mushroom and Barley soup, Minty Thai Chicken Salad, Hummus and Tabouli with Pita, Spicy Chicken Breast with Moorish Flavouring, Oven Baked Haddock with Romesco Sauce. I had Quinoa Pilaf, Minty Carrots, Roasted Cauliflowers, Green Beans with Rosemary and Lemon Zest, and Veggie Medley which was awesome…For dessert one night, I had a Pineapple Cranberry Twist…AND they gave you a link to the recipes on the menu…drool.

Friday night, I had no palpitations. Nor on Saturday…Sunday on the other hand…they wouldn’t stop…My heart rate was going up to 173 and one time it bottomed out at 8 beats per minute. The palpitations started when I was sitting up. And when I went to pee…Not like I was running a marathon or chasing Hugh Jackman or Adam Lambert around the room..

Sunday, I get the lovely news that I will be having a cardiac ablation on Monday…wonderful…It was supposed to take 2-3 hours…sorta like AAA saying 45 minutes for getting to you…
The Greek doctor came in and told me I couldn’t have anything after midnight…bummer. I shoulda pulled a King Henry the Eighth. LOL

I get taken down, and wait…I brought down the age of the place…and was the only girl there…oy…it was all OLD GUYS!!! Eek!!!!

I think I was there for like an hour getting prepped. They had to shave me…oh joy…I asked if the girl could do my legs and she said that wasn’t included…I said, “Great, I’ll die with Clydesdale ankles…” The girl didn’t think it was funny…

I was watching Law and Order again…talk about predictable…jeeze. I begged to be put completely under. But they said they couldn’t….dammit. I even told them that I had woken up during one…it didn’t matter…They took me into the place and I got shifted onto the operating table. There was a big flat screen that would show where they were working…lovely…I got the anesthetic put in and that was it…I KNOW I felt them working around in there…wasn’t very pleasant…blech…but in revenge I managed to throw up on them…hehe…The doctor who performed the surgery was in the room and some nurses…but Jimmy Hoffa and Elvis coulda been there and I wouldn’t have known it.

I guess Ernie was calling and calling and calling…but I wasn’t done until for like 6 hours…I called Ernie at 12:30 to tell him I was going down, and the doctor called him at 7:30...I don’t remember any of that…I did get food though LOL I only got soup and water…but it was good.

I got sprung on Tuesday afternoon.
And had an appointment with Dr. Koplan on the following Monday. Because of all the scar tissue from the open hearts from way back when, and the connections being so close to the SA, basically the starting point of how the heart beats, the next time this happens I WILL need a pacemaker…and Dr. Landzberg wants me to have my Aortic Valve replaced…we’ll deffo hold off on that for as long as I can.
We had an Indian doctor check me out before Dr. Koplan come in and he says to me, "I don't think you remember me, but I was in your heart..." oh Ick!!!

I guess they had told me all of the info on Monday or Tuesday, but I don’t remember any of it…

So that’s how my April adventures ended…but why is it whenever you look like crap, there’s cute guys coming out of the friggin wood work? It’s so unfair.

Adventures in Arkady

2009-11-21T19:17:00.000-08:00

PART 1
CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 3

Ariana woke the next morning after writing down the wonderfully peaceful dream to the sounds of a battle outside and sprang to the window to see what was going on. Pirata was leading the rebels in hand to hand combat exercises. The sun was very high in the sky, practically overhead. She stretched carefully and went into the bathroom to bathe and brush her teeth. She peeled off the bandages and was surprised that she wasn’t more banged up than she was. The welt was still an angry red and there was a small amount of bruising, but the dried blood washed off easily enough.

She toweled off and slid on a light-weight linen chiton of sky blue and girded with a silver cord. She brushed her hair carefully and wound it into a roll in the back of her head and pinned it with a silver barrette. She went downstairs to the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee and almost felt guilty that she hadn’t checked in on Aristotles as she had gone by. She made herself a brunch of eggs and ham, with fresh milk and orange juice. After she finished, she covered her dress with an apron and washed the too many pots and pans that had accumulated. She hoped her mother wasn’t feeding every single one of the soldiers. It was bad enough to be feeding the two already! Aiding and Abetting went through her mind again…

She went outside to check the few animals they had left: a couple of cows, a rooster, and some scrawny, not even good for soup hens, but they laid wonderful eggs, and she really like the flighty things. As she crossed the yard with the rooster in her arms, she remembered climbing the huge, ancient oak tree, falling out of it, almost breaking her neck, running through the fields growing high with wheat and wildflowers, riding horses across the knolls, planting her favourite flowers in beds and vines to cling to the portico. She sighed deeply thinking of how things had changed so dramatically in such a little amount of time.

Ariana hadn’t been paying attention to where she’d been walking…she had never had to before…but she found herself out where some of the men had been.

“I got a better cock for you to pat.” The voice came from behind her and the good old rooster crowed and raised his hackles. He jumped away from Ariana and spurred the man, who kicked the bird. The rooster wasn’t going to run away from protecting his mistress and came back for another round. She grabbed her bird up before the soldier could punt him again and looked desperately for a friendly face. Even Pirata’s son would be more than welcome, but he had kept a low profile since his punishment.

A warning flashed through her mind quickly, and she released the bird so that he could get away and Goddess knew, if he could, get help for her. An arm came around her throat from behind and she found herself on the ground fighting for air. She struggled and managed a gurgling scream before a piece of cloth was shoved in her mouth and her hands held above her head. The sun was baking her bare skin as her dress was torn away and she heard an electric crackle over the lustful panting above her. She wanted to just go away from her body; to not feel what was going to happen.

The men didn’t hear the whip singing above their heads until the first lash landed. The group that surrounded her broke apart like mist in the sun. The infamous electric whip cleared the way for her rescuers. She could’ve cried with relief when she saw Pirata and Vulpes, with her rooster on his shoulder like a big goofy parrot.

The older man reached her a step before his son and lifted her to her feet. He whisked her away without a word. Her dignity was long gone and she couldn’t control the hurt and terrified sobs that broke free from her soul. The two men got her to the front door, then Pirata whispered something to his son, and returned to the scene of the crime.

As Vulpes walked her up the stairs, she asked, “How did you know I was in…trouble?” He rubbed the bird’s wattles and said, “The rooster went into the tree and wouldn’t shut up. When Ari went looking to see if you could do it, you weren’t in your room and our troops were too quiet all of a sudden…”

She left her escort outside the door and went inside. Aristotles’ eyes followed her across the room. She took off her now destroyed clothes showered with water as hot as she could stand, and put on a dress that had seen better days, being patched with various stains on it…she used it when she did the heavy cleaning. She took the barrette out of her hair and threw it on the floor.

“I’m sorry, Ariana. I’ll have to have a talk with my men. This kind of thing can’t be happening when I’m not out there with them.”

“Talk to them!” she screeched. “They should be beaten to within an inch of their lives! Starting with YOU!!!” The rebel leader flinched at her words.

Aristotles finished tucking his shirt into his pants and turned back to her. “Come with me.” She meekly followed him. Pirata had the men in formation. When the rebel leader motioned Ariana and Helen forward, she almost wished one of them would raise their ashamed faces to her so she could glare at them. He put his hand on the women’s shoulders and stated, “The Lady Helen and her daughter are the owners of this place and no harm will come to them. If there are any concerns between them and you, come to me. I will take care of it. They will NOT be used for your sport. If these ladies are hurt by anything that you do, the penalty will be 50 lashes, then hanging. It is not open to debate. This I have decreed.”

He turned to Vulpes and said, “And give Ariana back that Gods damned bird…” She stuck out her arm and the rooster marched regally from the boy’s shoulder to hers. Pirata dismissed the men and Ariana went to put the rooster back with his hens…she walked by the kitchen and broke him off a piece of bread for his valiant efforts. She dropped him and his treat off in the yard with an extra pat.

“Do you have a minute?” Ariana turned so fast all the birds scattered. She trailed Pirata to the barn and they perched on some old hay bales.

“You need to know something about him…Ari’s father was an Archon many years ago. He was stealing and lying and cheating his people so that the poor had nothing. They rose up and deposed him. In return, he blamed all his troubles on his child. He was beaten constantly…” Ariana felt another twinge of conscience because of what she had said. “Most of the physical scars are gone, but there are some mental ones that still fester. When he grew up, he knew he’d join a rebellion so that another like his father might not come to power.”

She looked him straight in the eye and asked simply, “What are you warning me about?”

“I’m just asking you to be careful around him.”

“Don’t you trust your leader?”

“With my life, Ariana. And you can trust him with yours. And Helen’s. I wouldn’t have my youngest serve with him if I thought I couldn’t. I just thought you should know.”

She thanked him and left…that was something else to think about. She felt that she could trust Pirata, maybe Vulpes, but their friend and leader, not so much. Especially if what the old one eyed soldier said was true…which she had no reason to doubt. She knew the battle scarred veteran wouldn’t lie to make her feel sorry for Aristotles. That WAS a shitty upbringing, and she was once again reminded of how good she had had it with her two loving parents.

Ariana was surprised that she hadn’t had a reaction yet to the attack on her. She hadn’t ever been that close to having had such a personal attack. Her suitors might’ve tried a grope or two, or stolen kisses, but they had been easily fended off…If no one had noticed, the rape most certainly would’ve taken place. She wouldn’t have been able to stop it…Even though it was summertime warm, she started to shiver and her teeth chattered…She fled up the stairs and into her room. She jumped into the bed, gathered some heavy blankets around her, and let herself have a good cry. In the next moment, her mother was there, rocking her like she was a baby, and looking her over from head to toe. She cried harder.

“She wasn’t touched, Helen.” Pirata stated from the doorway. “We got to her in time.”

“Thank Hera!” her mother exclaimed. “No man would have her otherwise.”

Well SHIT! Ariana thought. That can’t be all she cares about…So she asked, plainly and baldly for the truth in front of witnesses. “Why would you think that, mother?”

“Your virginity is part of your dowry.”

“How backwards is that? If there’s a value to be had it should be for what’s between a woman’s ears rather than what’s between her legs…” Ariana blushed to the roots of her hair at Aristotles’ words. If he meant it as a compliment for her brain power, she would take it as such. It really WAS a backward way of thinking. There was more to life than to just bear children: she wanted to travel like her father, learn and do and experience, just like he had. Then maybe she’d settle down with the man of her choice, when she was darned good and ready. That’s what her father got for telling her stories about property owning women, women who ran whole estates, leading armies and all sorts of other empowering activities without the help of men. She knew her own mind. She knew what she wanted and a guy wasn’t going to get into the middle of it and just plain fuck it up. If she had to be completely honest, she’d much rather Aristotles to little Yiorgios, her bespectacled, bugeyed betrothed…yeesh!

After a while, she mechanically went through the motions of preparing dinner. She had no idea what she cooked, but ate it anyway. The other three at the table kept casting glances her way, but she didn’t notice, so lost in her thoughts she was. She went to bed early, still with the cogs of her mind spinning endlessly.
Those damned blue eyes were in the middle of it all…and their child…What the Hades was up with that?

It took a couple of days for her to work it all through…She’d keep her mouth shut about the dream/vision. The rebel leader didn’t need to know about it. There was no feeling of how the child had been conceived, consensual or through force. It didn’t seem like force to her, so they would be close sometime…he had looked older, so it was in a distant future. She almost wished she could figure out the exact timing…She sighed…no, she really didn’t need to know…

“Are you done brooding now?” Her mother asked, when she passed by with a tray of freshly baked bread…

It wasn’t brooding as much as heavily involved thinking…and that always took time…she’d sometimes take off to a secret glade in the woods and just ponder for hours. She felt trapped in the house with all the men around it. It had never bothered her this much when the workers were there, what was the big difference?

The rebel leader was the big difference, if she was honest. They walked around each other like wary animals, but she sensed a few tentative first steps towards a truce. Her mother and Pirata were having a great time together…it was rather sickening actually. Holding hands when they thought noone could see them. Yuck! The morning that she came out of the room with a basket of her dirty laundry and there was Pirata in her mother’s bed, just completely freaked her out…and she couldn’t even look at either of them.

Not that she’d begrudge her mother any happiness that she could get. Gods knew it had been a struggle for them. If it hadn’t been for her father’s insurance which had been extremely generous, pensions from being Archon, and other sundry little things that arrived every now and again by messenger, they wouldn’t have been able to get through it all.

A couple of weeks into the rebel’s stay, Ariana and Aristotles found themselves alone in the house. The wheat was being harvested to be ground. It always made her allergies act up so she got out of that part of it and the threshing. Pirata, Helen and most of the armed force had gone to help out because it seemed like the usual pickers were not coming because they had been taken to interment camps until they could be sorted out as to which side they were on…Actually, they weren’t on any side, just following the harvests. It made Ariana ill to think of all the nice people that had helped out being caged like wild beasts.

She was heading out to the portico to sit and read a book with her cup of coffee.

“May I join you?” He must’ve been sneaking right up behind her because she hadn’t heard him. She jumped up, dropped her book, losing her place and sloshing her coffee onto her dress and her bare feet.

“Dammit!” She swore. “I thought I was the only one here.”

He produced a handkerchief from a pocket in his uniform pants, and dabbed at her dress. It was wonderfully sheer from the moisture and there was no hiding the fact that she was a grown woman from him, a full figured one at that.

His eyes blazed like blue lasers, and he couldn’t seem to find any words…after what seemed like an aeon, he pointed to the door and Ariana ran to change…She had just been made more aware that Aristotles was a fine specimen of human male and she had seen his more than normal reaction to her near nakedness.

She splashed water on her face, hoping that her internal trembling wouldn’t show on the outside. His touching her had had nothing sexual to it, but DAMN! The butterflies that were flitting through her seemed the size of Python. She had never felt like that! Ever! They had touched briefly when passing such mundane items as a salt shaker at supper or she’d put a hand on his shoulder when it was time for lunch. She had seen him shirtless, but even on the night that she had woken screaming, she hadn’t seen him naked, she had been too afraid to even sneak a peek.

Ariana descended and went back to the porch. There was more coffee poured, the creamer and honey jar, and her book was on the wicker table. A knock sounded on the door frame and she turned. “I didn’t know how you liked it. Sorry.” It seemed like the rebel leader was back under control too. She silently thanked the Gods for that. She poured in her usual ton of milk. She liked it with no sweeteners even though most folks used honey.

In a comedy of errors, she was sitting on the near side of the table and the other chair was on the far side. Either she moved or he had to step over her feet to sit…She decided to move at the same time that he decided to step over. They inadvertently brushed against each other all way up.

“Mithra, Ariana.” Was all he managed to say. The coffee was forgotten as he crushed her to him. She felt as though her body was butter melting in the sun…His kisses became more forceful, and she tentatively ran her hand up his chest to his shoulder feeling the hair under her fingertips. She fit into the shape of him like a hand in a glove He finally broke the embrace and stepped away to the far side of the porch. He ran his fingers through his hair as she sunk into the chair because there were no bones left anywhere in her body.

“Ariana?”
“Ari?”

“Thank the Gods”
“Thank Mithra”

The older folks’ arrival couldn’t have been better timed. They looked between the two younger people…Pirata swore softly.

“You cannot do this!” Her mother shrieked.

“We didn’t do anything.” Ariana protested.

“This is your future, I’m worrying about.”

“Oh for the Gods’ sakes, Mother! I am STILL a virgin! Your money is still safe!”

“Do you have anything to say, mister?!” She turned on Aristotles.

“No, kyria. I have not violated your daughter.” He explained why she had changed clothes and Ariana produced the evidence.

Pirata didn’t look any less dismayed. He sighed heavily and dropped into the chair Ariana had vacated.

“Ari, our coming here wasn’t an accident. I knew where this place was. I had been here with your father a few times. I met Helen back then.”

The rebel leader looked stunned. “What are you getting at?”

Ariana pieced it together first. ”It’s possible we’re half siblings.” Oh Gods. Ewww! No wonder her mother was so shocked when she saw Pirata. “Your father left Athenai, came here and started over with a new family.”

“That son of a bitch!” My mother swore. “I never knew!”

“He kept it quiet, Helen. He would’ve been tracked down and denounced as the traitor he was and then you and Ariana would’ve been denounced too. And the two of you would’ve been probably executed…”

Shit…Could it be any worse? What about now? Same deal seemed like it applied only now they KNEW that they were harboring criminals…Who was to say that the current Archon didn’t know about this place too? Ariana asked the question.

“Only Zeno and I knew about this place. And now that he’s gone…” The one eye shrugged. “Now Ari does too.”

“That’s not all of it is there?” Ariana looked straight at Pirata. “Ari…” the name felt familiar on her lips. “He wears the crest of your house, not Zeno’s like I do…” It was a custom to tattoo the children with a crest or monogram of the father’s house.

Ariana’s tattoo was an interwoven A and Z, but Pirata‘s, Vulpes’ and Ari‘s were a fox head.

“Ari’s my foster son.” She tapped her foot and waited for the whole truth to finally emerge…

“I was seduced by Lena, Zeno’s wife, as revenge because he was ignoring her. I was young and stupid and cheated on my sons‘ mother. Lena told him during a fight and we had words…”

“Had words! Bullshit! Pirata! He took your eye!”

The others on the porch gaped at Ariana, except for Ari.

“I think I’ve known all along. You took me into your home when Zeno left. Your wife never liked me and I thought it was because I was just a foster child…Now I know the truth. Thank you, old friend.”

She crossed to Ari and took his hand. She got a quick flash of her father beating his son for the smallest offense, until the little boy finally stood up to him at the tender age of 8. He was then cast off to the Vulpes clan to wave the mistake under his true father and his wife’s nose. Pirata had never treated Ari any differently than his troop of legitimate sons. All 10 of them!!

The older couple left the younger one. Helen still wasn’t happy about the closeness they were sharing, but at least her daughter was still chaste…she couldn’t even remotely say that about her and Pirata though…

An hour later, the veteran called to Ari and Ariana that it was supper time. Once again, she had no idea what she ate. Her mother was a good cook too. She got let out of dish duty because Pirata took up that slack for the night. She figured her mother and he wanted some alone time too.

It was sunny out, but dusk was coming, so they decided to take advantage of it.

“Be careful.” Pirata warned. She presumed it wasn’t about sex. At the very least they weren’t related by blood, thank Hera! No relation at all really. She had known anyways…the dream she had of Ari’s child had pointed that out for her. Ariana knew that Ari would be honorable, at least she hoped he would be. He hadn’t done anything more than a quick kiss when they had gone through the front door.

Helen had once told an old school friend that you could walk for days before coming to all the edges of our property. Ariana had never tried. She had heard stories of people getting “taken” in the woods and thought it was all scary stories so the kids wouldn’t go in and get lost. She had taken Yiorgios once to the edge of the forest and he wimped out and didn’t want to go in after he got there. She had gone to her special place and waited for him to come too, but he had never showed and she had gone back to the house to find him crying that he had lost her in the forest. Ariana had been grounded for a month. If it had been Ari, she knew that he would’ve followed right in after her.

A tugging at her wrist made her stop. Ari had paused to talk to some of his troops. She wasn’t afraid of anything happening to her anymore. She felt safe and protected with Ari nearby. She wandered a bit more, but stopped short feeling a presence behind her. It was Vulpes, smiling shyly.

“I haven’t thanked you for saving me, kyria. I’m sorry you got hurt too.”

“That’s alright. I was stupid and it was my own fault.”

“Would you like me to walk with you? Ari seems to be tied up…” She had noticed that too. He was stopping and talking to whoever came up to him.

“That’s okay, Vulpes, I’ve been walking these woods since I was a child. I’ll be fine.”

She continued on a couple of steps, before he grabbed her arm, glancing nervously back at the encampment. “But, kyria, it’s not safe anymore.”

“Release me this instant!” She yelped, more frightened than angry. He looked guiltily at the ground as Ari came stomping over.

“What’s going on here?!” He wanted a good answer and quickly.

She spoke soothingly. “Not a thing. Your foster brother just wanted to let me know that if you were going to be tied up for any length of time, that he’d see me safely on my walk.”

“Get back to camp, Vulpes!” The kid slunk away. Ariana wanted to go with him. They hadn’t done anything wrong, but she felt as if she had been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

“I don’t want my soldiers to get the wrong idea about my arraboniastikia.” Ariana knew her mouth was hanging open…

“Ari, I’ve been promised to Yiorgios Pallas. We‘ve been betrothed since I was 10 years old.”

“Do you love him, Ariana? Can you say that he makes your heart beat faster? Or make your knees give way?”

She wanted to tell him “Yes!” but couldn’t lie. She shook her head. “If I break the contract, we’d lose our house. His family lent us the money for the taxes when my father left. It was part of the agreement.”

“Is it just the money? When this is all over, I will have that and more. I can repay the loan to them.”

“I’m not a mercenary, Ari. If there was more time, I could fall in love with you. But I know that the time’s not right, and you’ll be leaving…” her voice broke. “And I will have nothing left to give to my husband.”

This conversation was not going to end well and she knew it. She was in love with the blond blue-eyed rebel, and in lust with him too…she needed some time alone to think and she’d only be able to get that peace in one spot…

She gave Ari a lingering kiss on the lips and slipped into the woods. He stood stunned for a few seconds before he pursued her. She knew the small paths and thickets to hide in to evade him. He was pretty good though, almost finding her twice. At last she made it to the safety of her secret spot. There was a standing stone, and a tiny brook, with a lovely natural arbour that formed a cave overhead.

She heard him calling out for her, but resisted answering. If he found her now, there would be only one conclusion and it would involve her giving herself to him and that just couldn’t happen. Not with the loan and the dowry hanging over her head. It was finally almost full dark. There were no rustling in the bushes of the night animals starting to forage and that wasn’t right and she suddenly got a frisson of fear rising up her spine.

She turned at a footstep beside her and a dark shadow reached for her. It wasn’t Ari and the animal/zoo smell of the arm that grabbed her wasn’t human…Before she was able to fight whatever it was off, two more hands grabbed her throat and pressed. The waning light turned into complete blackness and she was lost to the world.

Adventures in Arkady Part 1 Chapter 2

2009-11-14T07:07:00.000-08:00

What seemed like an eternity later, Ariana thought that she had dreamed the whole thing…until she rolled onto her back. She let out an agonized groan which brought Pirata over to her. Her head felt stuffed with cotton and she asked the time, at which he told her that she had been asleep for 2 nights and a day…She saw something in the old man’s eye that almost made her ask about the rebel leader…but she hadn’t even uttered the question when he answered her anyway.

“Ari blames himself for you getting hurt.” Well no kidding…It WAS his fault! “You really should’ve stayed inside, Ariana.”
“I couldn’t have let him kill your son, Pirata. I just couldn’t….” He patted her arm.

“He wouldn’t have gone that far. And I have more older and wiser sons who could take Vulpes’ place.” She wanted to ask another question, but a rap sounded on the door. Aristotles came in and, ignoring her, asked Pirata how she was…He shrugged.

“Better.”

“Then take your leave, old friend. There’s real coffee brewed.” The one eye stretched and yawned and left the two of them alone in HER room. Aristotles looked tired and she squashed the slight tinge of feeling sorry for him. Helen told her later that he hadn’t slept since the incident and had paced the house asking after her every five minutes. He closed the door after his friend had left, then came closer to collapse into an over stuffed chair by her bed. He rubbed the back of his neck, then took one of her hands in his. It was rough and calloused, but felt like it belonged there…”Oh NO!!!” Her inner voice screamed…”This was NOT going to happen!” Ariana closed her fingers tentatively tighter around it. The rebel leader shifted in the chair so that he was looking directly down at her. There were dark circles under his eyes and he didn’t appear as if he had shaved in quite a while either. “He’s actually pretty cute” she thought. “Scruffily cute.” He ran his free hand through his cross cropped blond hair and tried to stifle a yawn.

“Maybe you should get some sleep, too.” She finally said, after finishing her inspection of him.

“I can’t…” he stated simply.

“Why not?”

“Because it’s all YOUR fault…”

“What?!! My fault! I saw the blood lust in your eyes…you would’ve killed the boy! And the punishment no way NEAR fit the crime…”

“I cannot have dissension in the ranks!”

“But he’s only a child…

“He’s a half score and six years and has been with us for 3 years now. He should know better to hold his tongue by now…”

Three years!!! And they were just hearing about a rebellion NOW?! Stupid state run media…
“Nice of you to be stealing children for your rebellion.”

“Look, I won’t get into this right. I’m too tired to have an around the sundial argument with you.” His grip loosened and his eyelids fluttered shut.

“Now what“, she thought. “Should I wake him? He can’t stay here, even if he’s asleep and I would hope he’d know that I’m not…” She couldn’t finish the ridiculous way her mind was going.

Gritting her teeth and pushing the light linen sheet back, she rolled over and swung her feet out of the bed. She smirked at the surprised expression he had when she poked his shoulder and his eyes flew open.

“Take the bed, I’m done with sleeping…”she said. “It won’t be the first time I’ve slept in that chair.”

“But your back…”

“It really doesn’t hurt all that much.” She grimaced as a fold of her way too short, way too sheer summer cotton nightgown scraped across one of the wounds.

“There’s plenty of room.” The rebel leader looked between the bed and her.

“For who?”

“For the both of us…”

Ariana must’ve looked absolutely petrified, like Medusa had just peeked in the window, because he changed the subject. “Let me check your dressing.” She turned around, not wanting to watch him seeing her bare skin and what any response might be. But unfortunately, she could still see him in the mirror that hung on the door. They both winced. She because it hurt and he because he must’ve known how badly it hurt for him to be peeling off some of the tape to look.

“Looks like Pirata knew what he was doing with that herbal junk. There’s no infection, and you seem to be healing nicely.” Only one of the cords had actually landed on her back, thank the Gods, but still…she knew she’d have a nice scar to explain to her family someday. She could feel herself blushing as Aristotles’ eyes met hers in the mirror. He let the back of the gown down slowly so that it wouldn’t hurt her more and turned away. To give him some privacy, she went into the bathroom, used the facilities, brushed her teeth, even though raising her arms hurt like Hades; and splashed water on her face. She didn’t know if the dress she had been wearing would be worth saving or just put into the give away pile. When she figured enough time had gone by, she came back into her bedroom to find his clothes left on the floor and the man in her bed…To run away screaming would’ve been the wisest course of action, but Ariana didn’t. She pulled up a footstool and tried to get comfortable in the chair. She felt his eyes on her, but ignored the rebel leader’s glance. She was still a little groggy from the shot she had been given, and weak from the pain and knew that she still needed more sleep to help her heal.

She gave up the attempt to find a way for her injury not to be pressed on in any way after a few minutes while sleeping sitting up and made her way back to her bed. She kept her eyes averted and slipped under the sheet. The bed moved as he shifted next to her, but she closed her eyes and prayed that he wouldn’t get any ideas…or maybe she was just worried that her own curiosity would get the best of her…

As his breath became slow and deep, Ariana knew there would be no way that she’d be able to fall asleep as quickly, if at all. On the other side of the bathroom was the room her mother had set up for him, so she made her escape. She closed the door on her bedroom side, but locked the one in the other room. Doors weren’t usually locked in the house, but she felt a bit safer that way. She flopped on the bed, and was lost to the Land of Hypnos.

She dreamt of Aristotles and what would be. She’d have a child with him. Pirata would be fine with Helen and the rebellion would be ended. Too many times, when she dreamed, it came to pass. She had given up on telling anyone. There were lots of people who thought she was a prophetess or worse, a WITCH! Having such a curse, or a talent, wasn’t for the weak, she knew after the first time she told a friend that her mother was going to have a baby and it wasn’t going to be the husband’s…and got beaten up for her trouble. It had started after she had become a woman and sometimes she wished BOTH things would go away. She wrote the dreams down just to keep a record of them. Some of the more vague ones didn’t happen, but if there was any clarity with people and places and times, things that could be experienced by her senses, those were the ones that would come true.

Why she hadn’t dreamed of Ari before he appeared in her home shocked her! How could something so earth shattering not have come to her beforehand? She couldn’t say anything to him. Just because the Oracle at Delphi was still being used didn’t mean that everyone had to be one or even listened to. She remembered the story of Cassandra who wouldn’t yield her virginity to Apollo and he gave her the gift of prophecy with the fine print that she would never be believed. Or would the rebel leader drag her all over the country, hoping he could use her in some way to make the battles go his way?

Ariana rolled over, and felt again the stinging of the whip and a flash of light as it descended and woke up screaming! The bathroom side door was broken in, and Pirata and Helen rushed in to find a naked Aristotles holding the hysterical woman in his arms. The thunder from outside and another bolt of lightning lit the room.

“She’s always been afraid when Zeus is hurling his thunderbolts.” her mother, switching on the light, explained as Pirata threw his friend a blanket to put around him. She felt safe in the rebel leader’s embrace, but moved away to use an offered handkerchief from her mother. Mortified wasn’t even close enough to use to describe her current situation…Screaming out loud, and crying like a baby, being found in a naked man’s arms, let alone one she had known for all of 3 days…

What an intolerable situation! Ariana was still trembling, with her heart beating a mile a minute, but at least she was fully clothed. That would’ve made it so much worse. There would’ve been no suitable explanation. It was bad enough that HE didn’t have anything on, but with HER bare too…forget it! Her father would’ve forced them to be married at gunpoint or just shot him on the spot…All of a sudden, she wanted her daddy back. He had been her rock of Gibraltar and she needed him right now.

She squared her shoulders, blew her nose and took a deep breath, centering herself and feeling the security of her home around her. The rebel leader put his hand on her shoulder. She turned to look at him. “I’m okay now, thanks.” He removed it and stood. He nodded to the two older people and left through the broken door.

“Would you like me to give you a sleeping potion?” She nodded and within 5 minutes her mother came back with a drink that tasted of mint and caused her dreams of quiet green realms, burbling streams and Satyrs playing their pipes.

Nano 09~Adventures in Arkady~~

2009-11-12T19:00:00.001-08:00

This one's set in Greece around the time of the Trojan War.
The main characters are Ariana, Aristotles, King Theran. There are lots of incidental characters too.

PART 1
CHAPTER 1

It started like any other early summer morning in Ariana’s short life…how was she to know that what was about to happen would change her life, and she hadn’t even had the good (or bad) fortune to have seen it coming.

She and her mother were in the parlour of their home watching the video screen. When the breaking news fanfare blared and the banner appeared, she felt that something had gone wrong, and nothing would be the same again.

The bad feeling was reinforced when the talking heads stated that the country was at war. The government was going to do all they could to stop the Rebellion, but it would be a long drawn-out ordeal and they needed all of the citizens’ “help” to shorten it.

Neither woman agreed with the current leaders’ idiocy…he was a blathering puppet to his advisor’s puppet masters. When he made appearances, it was like they propped him up and pulled his strings to make him move correctly…

Since they were way out in the country, away from the large cities, they figured they’d have plenty of time to prepare in case the worst came to pass. The crops were all planted and doing well. The winter had been mild, like it usually was, just a dusting of snow, more of an annoyance than a hazard. Ariana had heard that some parts could be completely covered. The big city of Athenai didn’t get much either, not that they went there all that often now that her father was gone. It was amazing to think it had been as many years as it had. She knew that her mother, Helen Zeno, missed him. She had seen her staring down the road too many times when she was younger. She had always hoped that he’d come back. He had to give her away at her wedding. She had been betrothed at the age of 10 in an arranged marriage to a son on a neighboring (if you could say, 4 miles away was neighboring) estate.

While her mother was lost in her thoughts, and Ariana pondered what might need to be done in the fields in the next few weeks, a sharp rap sounded at the door. They weren’t expecting any visitors, because they would’ve been sent a message before hand…

Helen went to open the door anyway. A uniformed man and about a dozen others pushed their way in. Helen was shoved aside as they checked all the rooms on the first floor with guns drawn, then went up the stairs. Ariana sprang to her feet as they streamed in.

“You’ve got no right here!” she yelled, glaring at the leader. “Get out of our house!”

He looked down at her and stated quietly, “We have every right. There’s a war on.”

My mother went to turn off the video screen, but as she did the Archon came on and started to blather on about the Rebels: their appearances; he made them out to look like trolls or worse, except for their leader who he described as having one eye and a beard. Photos were flashed on the screen, as the vitriol continued. It ended with one of the puppet masters telling the citizenry that they were all armed and considered dangerous and anyone giving aid to them would be considered traitors too…

“Wonderful,” Ariana thought. “We’ve been struggling all these years to prevent our home from being taken by the government for taxes, just so they can take it through no fault of ours.”

The voice died out as one of the soldiers put his rifle butt through the screen. Helen gasped in horror, and Ariana picked up a heavy crystal trinket dish to hurl at the man.

“That will be enough!” A different voice snapped. “We are guests in these ladies’ house and will act accordingly.”

“Not the rabble you obviously are.” Ariana muttered under her breath. She didn’t think that anyone heard her, but HE did…

“Very true”. The soldier stated drily, as his ice blue eyes scanned her up and down. Ariana’s spine stiffened and her chin came up as she took offense to being looked over like she was a ewe going to market. It seemed like THIS was the man in charge rather than the one that the Archon THOUGHT was the leader as he seemed to defer to the younger man. “Interesting” Ariana thought to herself.

The one eyed older man came to stand beside the newcomer and an expression of the Gods knew what came into his face as he looked at his leader, Helen and she. Her mother seemed to try to become invisible under the one-eye’s dark gaze. The two men spoke quietly, before the command of “At Ease!” came. The clatter of rifles being dropped to the floor sounded and soldiers kept watch out the windows, while others flopped where they were.

Helen ran out to the kitchen and as Ariana watched her go, she got a chill as she realized that they were just two women against however many armed rebels. She wasn’t keen on the odds at all. The old one eye looked at her and as if reading her mind growled, “There is less harm to come from us than your Archon, so you don’t have to be afraid.”

The leader glanced at his men and then around the room.

“Is there a place to talk here?”

She led them down the hall and into the dining room. It had two open windows which the leader gazed at nervously before she shut them and closed the curtains. The older man stood guard by the door, which he closed after looking behind them.

Without too much preamble, the leader started explaining why they chose this particular place instead of another.

“My name is Aristotles and am the head of this band of soldiers. My friend here” He indicated the one eyed man, “Is Pirata Vulpes and we have need of an out of the way place to house our forces. We don’t wish harm to you or your property, but if it comes to that, we will not hesitate to take what we need by force…”

“We’ve heard what the Archon said.” Ariana stated. “Is it true? That we could lose everything by helping you?”

Both rebel leaders nodded.

“Shit!” she thought. “At least they’re standing up for something while the rest of the country sit and complain and do nothing…”

Aristotles must’ve realized that she was thinking fiercely because when she again paid attention to where she was, he had a wry smile on his face.

It was just about noon and Ariana’s stomach felt the embarrassing need to growl that it was time to be fed. Not that she wanted to be aiding and abetting people on the government Shit List, but ingrained politeness required her to ask if they were hungry.

The three went into the kitchen where Helen was finishing up making some simple sandwiches. They were Ariana’s favourite too: Tuna with celery, onions and tomatoes…She went to the refrigerator, took out the pitcher of lemonade, put it on the table and got four glasses for them all. Her mother opened the jar of Kalamata Olives and Feta cheese and set that out too.

The guys set into the food like it had been years since they had seen any… After the tableware had been set into the sink, Ariana started washing them. “Evkeristo” Aristotles said from too close behind her. She almost jumped out of her skin. When she turned around, he had taken off the soft cap he wore and she saw the blond hair and blue eyes that were so rare in the country. She, herself, had light brown hair and grey eyes, a small nose, and round face from some long distant lost traveler from over the mountains, and thousands of miles and years away.

She could hardly fathom where HIS ancestors were from, except the WAY far North where they wore bear furs and horned helmets and wrote in a strange alphabet, and raped and pillaged. She had learned about some of the cultures outside her own because of her father’s travels. He used to bring back momentos that he’d let her rummage through his cases to find. It was like a small treasure hunt when he returned. Ariana gave herself a mental shake as Pirata’s voice broke through her reverie.

“Gods, Ari, you have good fortune in finding excellent locations.” He continued. “ Although we’re in the middle of nowhere, the estate is in the very heart of Archon territory. Lady Helen told me…”

Ariana’s jaw dropped. How dare the rebel refer to her mother by her given name?!

“She also showed me the storehouses and the root cellar. There’s enough food for all of us…” Us WHO?! Ariana thought “to last a long siege.”

“Good” Aristotles, purred, rubbing at the scruff of a beard. Because the house stood on a bit of a hill and the forest edges were over a mile away with one long winding road in, it was easily defensible…Ariana could almost hear the gears turning in his mind.

Her father had picked the spot for the same reason…”Clever man. Is his daughter as intelligent?” Ariana blinked at the rebel leader.

“Excuse me?!”

Aristotles spoke to her again as if she were a simple child…”I asked if you had any brains in that pretty little head of yours…but since you didn’t answer, I would presume not…”

In outrage, she took a swing at him. “How dare he think that she was a stupid child?!!!” He had hold of her fist before it made it halfway to his jaw. “She doesn’t have very much good sense, does she? I cannot in good conscience converse with a child with a half score of years behind her….”She swung the other fist at him. Pirata grabbed the angry young woman from behind, as she spluttered and hissed like a cross between a wild cat and a serpent.
“It doesn’t look like your daughter has too good of control of her temper, Helen…”

“Sometimes she’s too much like Zeno, rather than me.”

Pirata’s eye widened in surprise…at her father’s name, but Aristotles didn’t catch it. Ariana filed that little bit away in her memory for later.

“I’ve heard of the man. He was an Archon many years ago.” he stated.

“He was my husband.” was all Helen quietly said.

Ariana had loved her father. Her mother hadn’t said too much when he left for the last time…neither of them had known that at the time, though. She still missed him too, even if it had been almost a decade since the bad news had come.

The rebel leader asked for a tour of the property so he could tell his soldiers where to set up tents, and whatever else they might have to use while they were there. The two women wanted to defer, but neither could find a credible excuse. Ariana took Aristotles outside to check the outbuildings while Pirata and Helen and a couple of the other soldiers would do an actual inventory of supplies. They had a stable, but no horses: they had had to sell them to pay the ever rising taxes levied for no good reason. They bartered for meat and wool from some of the neighbours’ flocks, weaving fabric and selling it back. Ariana could read and write and was great with numbers so she’d do the accounts in exchange. They hired some itinerants every year and they were so fair in their dealings that the same people kept coming back for each season. She explained that they were pretty self sufficient. The summer wheat would be ready to harvest shortly. She hoped that the soldiers wouldn’t still be there then. There’d be too much explaining to have to do and if word got out that they were harboring criminals, they’d be out on the street with nothing.

The rebel leader didn’t say much, but she knew that he was processing the information as she prattled on. She noticed that more soldiers had come since they had been inside. How many more would there be? The situation was making her more and more uncomfortable. She didn’t KNOW these men. They could be murderers or rapists or worse! She wanted to run back into the house, bolt the door and hide until it was all over with.

As sick and tired as she was over the never ending restrictions on travel(not that they went anywhere), rising taxes on the middle and lower classes, subsidizing producers not to produce, and outright thievery by the rich, she was not going to openly rebel! She couldn’t! Not if it meant losing the only home she had known, maybe going to prison or having to beg on the streets or become a prostitute, which in her virgin state might prove to be a lost cause(no pun intended), and Gods only knew what might become of her mother! She was too old to be made to do unsavory things…They were both healthy so maybe they could go along with the itinerants as they went from field to field. Ariana sighed. There had to be something they could do. Not like packing up the whole estate in a bag and moving away hadn’t occurred to her more than once.

By a quick count of tents and estimating that each could hold 2 or 3 men, she guessed that there were close to a hundred rebels on the grounds in front of the house…no way that they could hide them in case anyone came around snooping. Shit! She hoped that it wasn’t likely, but it wasn’t like that it hadn’t happened before…

She stopped the rebel leader and asked if it was possible that they could move their encampment to the back of the house or anywhere not so openly “out there.” She made a quick visual measurement to see whether they’d all fit in the back…

Aristotles did the same, taking quick glances between the tents and the house. “I guess you DO have a brain after all.” Ariana didn’t know whether to be insulted or complimented. “I’ll have my men move so we won’t be so obvious. Will that make you less nervous?” Having them find somewhere ELSE to stay would be a big help on that point, but she wisely kept her mouth shut.

He gestured to a young man, not much older than a boy really and told him to have all the gear moved more towards the back of the property so that it couldn’t be seen from the front.
“But I thought…” the kid started. Aristotles didn’t say or do anything to make him, but he stopped and went to carry out his leader’s order. She didn’t know if it was respect for Aristotles, fear, or something else that kept his soldiers in line and didn’t really want to find out the hard way.

They ended up where they started, on the portico at the front of the house. Ariana’s companion rested a hip on the railing and looked around once more, making sure that the kid was doing what he had been told. Helen and Pirata joined them a while later. The older woman had opened up a couple of other bedrooms for the two men to use. Ariana thought it was a bit presumptuous. She’d rather they not be that near NOR anywhere in the house at all. Having a man that they didn’t know and wasn’t family in the house, made Ariana’s skin crawl. It just didn’t seem right; like they were opening their home to them…just opening the doors and saying “Do what you want, we won’t say anything…”

It wasn’t like her mother to be like that, and that was something else that made her nervous. She had never even looked at a guy since her father had died…maybe it was about time…but Shit! Someone who against the government? How could she be that stupid?

The two women went back in the house to start getting supper prepared to be cooked. It would be stuffed eggplants, and peppers with a salad. Helen told Ariana to put out the good dishes and silverware…and they got into an argument when she set the table with the everyday stuff anyways…

“Do you want them to think that we’re rich or something? That would just give them incentive to steal! What are you thinking??!!!”

“Daughter, I am thinking that we are entertaining guests in our house and your father would be shocked to think that his child wouldn’t as respectful…”

Ariana threw up her hands. “What-EVER!!” and reset the table with the good stuff.

Once everything was cooked, Helen sent Ariana out to find Aristotles and Pirata. She would rather be hand feeding Argos and Kerberus…

They were in the parlour listening to the radio…She knocked on the door jamb. Another thing she was adding to the Shit List. Knocking on doors in her own house, broken video screen, aiding and abetting…Dammit! She called…once, then again, then yelled “Supper!!!” and returned to the dining room. They had all the windows open once again as it was hot, and there was no way that Ariana was going to close up the house so that THEY could feel more comfortable. To Hades with that!!! They weren’t invited guests. They were unwanted and she had no reason to make it any easier on them…

She knew she was acting like a spoiled child, but couldn’t help herself. She and her mother had been doing alright by themselves…they didn’t need guys to be underfoot, telling them better ways to do things and to just be annoying. But then the guys that she knew from growing up were like that. 98% of the time she wanted to smack her betrothed senseless because he either deferred to whatever she said or told her that he would do it differently.

There were others who envied the estate and wanted THAT more than her, some that were too young, too old, too fat, too thin, smelled like feet, lots of excuses…but at this point marriage wasn’t a top priority. Getting the soldiers to move on was…

She was running through various delicious ways of making them leave when she heard her name mentioned…
What in Hades name was her mother doing?! It was bad enough that she was making them welcome, but giving names out freely just went against it all! She had made SURE that she hadn’t introduced herself…

“Ariana, that’s a very pretty name…means “Very Holy”…doesn’t it?”

“My husband named her.” the other woman elucidated.

That was the final straw that broke the camel’s back. Ariana lost her temper and turned on her mother. “Why don’t you tell them that I can speak 4 languages, write in two others, keep books, thresh grain, churn butter, plant crops, slaughter animals for food, and that though I have been kissed, I have never lain with a man!”

By the end, she was yelling at the top of her voice. Aristotles had the good sense to blush. Her mother had her face in her hands and Pirata was trying hard not to laugh. Once again her tongue had gotten her in trouble. Gods dammit! Would she never learn?!

There were soldiers with guns drawn standing in the open doorway wondering what the cause of the commotion was. Stupidity, basically was the cause…Ariana wanted to hide. The soldiers were mumbling between themselves and she saw coins change hands…Lovely, taking bets on whether their leader could bed the landowner’s daughter…just great…

“Take off!” Pirata yelled. “It’s no concern of yours what goes on in the house…”
“Or doesn’t…” a higher voice piped in.

“10 Lashes, Vulpes,” Aristotles, bellowed getting out of his chair…there were too many shocked faces as the soldiers slunk away…

What the Hades?! He was going to whip some kid because he opened his mouth at the wrong time? Would he stop there or was it possible that they could be whipped too? Pirata told the women to stay in the house. But Ariana being her stubborn self, felt drawn to the actions outside. She knew she shouldn’t care about the soldier’s internal strife, but if it would keep them out of their hair, she wanted to know.

“Ariana?!” Her mother pleaded. “Stay inside with me!” That wasn’t going to happen and she should’ve not wasted her breath.

She went out the front door, and around the house. And she found out WHY she should’ve stayed inside. The boy was shirtless and tied to a tree. Aristotles produced the whip…she had seen one before and wasn’t impressed. But there was some switch on the handle and the cords of the cat o’ nine tails started to glow with some sort of electrical charge…She was fascinated and repelled at the same time. She could only hope that it would NEVER be used on her mother or herself.

The number of soldiers had increased even more and they were spreading around the sides of the house. She had to get to the rebel leader and stop his punishment of the kid…so he opened his mouth at the wrong time. She did it every day at least once. As the first lash hit his back the boy named Vulpes screamed…
“Damn, Damn Damn!” Ariana thought. “This cannot be happening. I can’t allow this!” The kid fell silent as the progression of lashes continued. Somehow or another she got between the soldiers and was able to get to Pirata’s side. She put her hand on his arm. The rebels were all muttering nervously, because it seemed like he had never had to use a whip on any of them before and never for such a little thing…

The old one eye looked down at her, before he cast his glance back to the boy, who Ariana had finally figured out was his son…His knuckles were white and she knew that he was feeling it as much as Vulpes was. She was mentally counting 5-6-7...

“Stop this!!” she shrieked running forward without thinking right in front of the whip’s falling lashes…Ariana wound up taking the boy’s 8th lash.
She couldn’t imagine anything more painful than the scorpions line dancing on her back while wearing cleats. “Shit, shit Shit!” she remembered herself saying. Aristotles was saying worse, having dropped the whip as soon as it had hit her and was kneeling by her side. Pirata cut his son down with a knife from his boot, shoved his leader out of the way and picked up the hurt young woman. There was blood on her back, and he ran to the house anyway with her in his arms. Helen was already in Aristotles’ face about the whole thing…she didn’t know her mother had it in her. Pirata gave her some sort of injection that made her float into the black of unconsciousness.